nope, had my ears done for about two years now. my lip and eyebrow will grow over really quick anyway. .. i havent' decided on anything yet anyway. i'm not sure if i wanna leave my bf, and my friends and everything.
It's 6 weeks, which is practically a blink of an eye.
If I offer one piece of advice to anyone it's this: never pass up the opportunity for a positive experience.
Your family and friends will be there whether you leave or not. Sure you will miss them, but it isn't like you're leaving for good.
What will you lose if you go? (Holes in your head! *L* Just teasing.) What will you lose if you don't go?
lol i guess i'm goin then.. well i guess i'm gonna end up havin to get them all re-done. not lookin forward to gettin my lip done over again.. three times! .. but oh well i guess that's it. lol it's gonna look so stupid when i take them out cuz there's gonna be a little dent there where the barbell was.
but it's all good. as long as i don't have to take out my tongue.
Or....you could just let 'em all heal over and not get 'em pierced again!
Never!! lol. i'll get them all done again eventually. that's how i met my bf, when i got my tongue done he was waiting to get his lip done. lol he took it out though, i kissed him once and our barbells got hooked together :wink: ... it wasn't that much fun trying to get them appart ..
well ... i don't even know where to start.. .. my bf got killed in a car wreck last night..
Oh my god Tierayn. I'm so very sorry (((hug))).
.... why is it when i get my life together.. something else happens.. i miss him.. there's so much i didn't get to tell him...
No - that is one of the things that really hurts about sudden deaths. But I am sure he knew how you felt.
((((((((((((((((((((((((Tierayn)))))))))))))))))))))))))))
Why not tell us about him?
he was awsome.. he was the first one i loved.. he was always there. he opened my eyes to a lot of things.. i wanted to thank him for everything he did for me.. and i just wanted to tell him that i love him.. We went through so much together.. he was always there to hold me when things got rough.. he gave me so much... my first kiss.. my first dance.. he took my virginity... All i want is for him to hold me and tell everything's gonna be ok.. ... I've tried so hard to tell myself that he's gone.. but it's so hard to believe. .. i guess it'll really kick in when i'm talkin to his grave stone instead of him..
Is it possible for you to see his body, Tierayn - would you feel ok with that? It would depend, too, on how the accident left him. Some people find comfort in seeing, and speaking to, and touching the person who has died. If that is not an option for you, could you write a letter expressing everything you want to say, and put it in the coffin? You CAN still tell him.
Of course it is going to take lots of time to believe he is dead. remember he is still alive in you - it sounds as though he helped and cared about you a lot. What are the most important things about him/his beliefs that are now a part of you? What did he most value about you? What would he want for you now?
I don't think i'm gonna be able to see him... he got beat up pretty bad. . .. he'd probably want me to just get myself back together.. but how can i.. i feel so guilty.. he was on his way to see me when a transport truck hit his car..
he always told me to keep my head up.. and that tomorrow would be a new day.. that everything happens for a reason. he taught me to look at everything from different points of view.. and that sometimes it wasn't as bad as i thought.. when i was with him i was happy.. everything was ok and for a while all my problems would disappear.. when my parents would have a go at me he'd take me in his arms, clean up all my cuts and bruses and tell me it was going to be ok... what am i going to do without him...
Tierayn - we always feel guilty when somebody dies - it is a similar reaction to how your leg jerks when someone hits the right spot on your knee - it does not mean that you ARE guilty.
Sometimes sh*t happens - you didn't cause it - he could equally well have been killed at any other time.
He didn't make your problems go away for a while - YOU did - because you felt good and cared for when you were with him.
Are there friends you can tell? You need people in the real world to be with you. You need to cry and have someone there while you do. Of course you can't think how you are going to go on right now - you are in shock and acute grief.
This is sort of like a dark tunnel you have to go through - just as trains do. At the moment, all you can do is look back at the light you are leaving - do that - grieve for him - think of him - cry for him. This is a tragedy - the loss of any young life is that. Let it out! But try to have someone there - especially people who also cared for him, if that is possible.
Thing is, you WILL move through the tunnel. Of course, you don't really believe that now - but it is true. The hardest part is the middle, when you know you cannot go back - but you cannot see the light of your future ahead - the future where the sadness is gentle, where the good parts of him remain with you, as part of you, and your life continues the better for having known him.
.. none of my friends live around here.. my parents don't give a ****.. they hated him anyway.. my eyes are red and swollen from crying.. all i want is for him to hold me. man he was only 16.. he didn't deserve to die.. it scares me to think that he's not gonna be there for me .. I don't wanna have to move on without him.. ...it's sorta like romeo and juliet.. except i'm not dead yet. ..never take life serious.. it's not permanent..
Gawd, how awful. My sympathies to you.
BTW, this is a time to cry. Don't stick it out, don't try to do the stoic stiff upper lip thing. That's nonsense. It is a time to mourn.
We're with you.
... i didn't sleep at all last night.... I went and visited his dad and his sister.. spent a while lying on his bed.. just remembering how he smelt.. the things he liked.. lookin through some pictures of me and him.. .. i miss him so much.
((((((((((((((Tierayn))))))))))))))))
I'm so scared that i'll start forgetting all the little things about him.. I wanna hold on to him forever and never let him go..
Why not write a diary of memories about him? Everything you want to remember about him and why his life was so special to you.
Ah, what a difficult time you have to go through kiddo! *hugs* We all wish we could ease your pain. The adage "time heals all wounds" is true. I think if you can remember that it won't always hurt this bad, it will help, if only a little.
I can only imagine how you feel...that something has been ripped away from the most tender part of you...that he can't really be gone because you just saw him this week...that if you only hope and pray hard enough he will be there...that your life is now forever altered...all of these things and more I imagine you must be feeling. If it all gets too difficult, try to seek someone out. I know you said you felt you had no one nearby, but what about his family? Someone at school? At the very least there is this forum and all the people here, although it's not as comforting as having a real life hug and support, I know. Is there a friend you can stay with for a few days? Or a relative?
most of my family hated Jason because they thought he was too old for me or something.. thought he was a bad influence.. so i really can't stay with any of my relatives.. i wouldn't want to stay with his family cuz they're goin through enough **** right now without me there.. . and my friends.. i dunno.. maybe i could stay with somebody for a bit or something... it seems like just yesterday he was taking me in his arms and telling me everything was gonna be fine .. and now he's gone.. I'm so used to having him around.. i'll pick up the phone to call him and 4 or 5 rings will be gone through before i realize that he's not gonna answer.. everytime somebody tells me to keep myself busy i'll say "maybe i'll see if Jason wants to do something... " and then i'll remember he's gone and i'll just start crying..
