Well i now want to leave, I just need to figure out how and when... I can't take it anymore, it is tearing me apart... driving me crazy.. I can't do it anymore.. he makes me feel like sh*t... he walks all over me and he lovess every minute of it.. God please give me the strength to leave him, I don't want to feel like this anymore, I just want to hide from everything.. I know where this relationship will lead to if I don't leave now... I also know he is going to come home very angry tonight... he went out with his friend tonight and I just talked to him and he is in a bad mood now.... He said they are boqling right now, the three of them.. there ws only supposed to be two, and then they are coming back to the house to drink... I don't want to be here when they come back but I can't leave right now, he will get even angrier... but I don't want to deal with him...I just walked into the house and he will probably be at the house within the hour... I hate my ohter friend right now, she is a back-stabbing b*tch.. but what is new... she was supposed to call me and go out with me tonight , but she ended up going out with my boyfriend and his friend... I am soooo p*ssed right now.. I just want to scream!!
You've got to go.
Go home to your family.
Send George a p.m.
You don't deserve to feel the way you're feeling right now. You're nice, you're smart, you deserve good things.
Go.
I sent george the pm already... Like I said I can't leave tonight.. nowhere to go, have to tell them first, can't just show up, my family isn't like that
I know it is stupid, but I just wrote this.. It helps me think.. figured I'd share it...
Wish I could disappear
Get away from here
Wanting something better than this
What will I truly miss?
Should I stay another day?
Is it time to go away?
Why do I feel like this?
What will I truly miss?
Is it time to say goodbye
All I do is cry and cry
Why did it turn out like this?
What will I truly miss?
Will this be worth it in the end?
Will my broken heart mend?
What do I do with this?
What will I truly miss?
Decisions, Decisions, what do I do?
Do I leave or stay with you?
Is there something more than this?
What will I truly miss?
Miss Christine, you just made my heart beat a bit stronger, knowing you've pm'd George.
Well, I figured... if all these people that don't know me think I should get help and I have a gut instincy that says I should and my some of my friends and his friends say he treats me bad, then maybe I should talk to someone! thank you everyone
I'm so glad you decided to leave. Can't you call your family now and ask them to go stay there?
Very good, Christine. You've taken that first step. You're stronger than you realize. You can break free of this oppression. You can break away and start to live your life the way you really want to. Keep us updated and let me know if there's anything I can do to help.
Maybe you will see me at the end of the month if I go to that boston meeting thingy... But I will keep u updated... All I know is that once I do leave It will feel amazing in the end and the pain will go away... I can do this... I can be strong... I just hope I can keep this attitude, he has the tendency to break me down and make me think I am thinking wrong... I can't let him do that, I won't let him do that...
Sweetie, the pain is more about confusion than about loss, isn't it? And it's scary. Most good things in life come from taking a chance and stepping outside of your expectations to look to your dreams and trust your instincts.
Remember HE is the one who is wrong. He is the one who is weak and needs to manipulate and mindfuck you in order to feel like a man. Try your hardest not to let the things he says poison your mind. Repeat a mantra in your head, or say a prayer, or think affirming thoughts.
You are going to be so proud of yourself.
CL, I really wish you had somewhere to go NOW, tonight. He may be easier to deal with tomorrow than tonight. Daylight makes people more sane.
You ARE strong! Not only that, we are all behind you, and you are with us in our thoughts. Feel us standing behind you, making you strong, making you do what will make your future bright and joyful.
These people care about me (repeat)... these people care about me....
They are right. You are strong and you can do this. Keep reminding yourself that you deserve to be happy. We are here for you and we care....
Keep your chin up.
Christine, I hope things are ok with you now. You said in your post a couple hours ago that you thought your bf would be back within the hour.
Please, please take care tonight. Stay safe, leave the apartment if you have to. If you have to leave in a hurry go to the police station. Use 9-1-1 if necessary. If you can't get to a police station go to a public place; a gas station or store. Have someone call the police.
I'm thinking of you and sending prayers your way.
Tomorrow you can take stock of your situation and proceed with a plan to move on. Take care CL. We're all here for you!
((((((((((CHRISTINE))))))))))
We care about you, Christine. So do your real-life friends and family.
Take care of yourself.
CL, I haven't read all the posts here, but enough to know what's going on with you.
You MUST LEAVE[/i] right now! Better to surprise your parents than to have them worried because they haven't heard from you, or worse.............
This is a life or death situation, so please get out, go to a friends house or to your parents house, they will understand and they will protect you.
If I were in your shoes I would leave when he is not around. Don't invite a confrontation by being there, just go, and deal with the rest when you have loving friends/family around you.
Nobody can make you feel less than you are without your permission!
Don't give it to him!
Good luck and God bless!
Thinking of you..... I hope all is well.
I just got on and received CL's pm. I have given her the number of a
group in the next town who do counselling and provide shelter and
protection in complete confidentiality. Thes people are outstanding.
CL - as I told you, there is nothing you can say to these folks that they
haven't heard dozens of times before. They will take care of you and that
guy won't be able to find you. They'll help you get your act together. It's
what they do and they're damn good at it.
God bless you.
George, thanks for the update.
You're welcome. Let's hope everyone's support
here will help her take this step.
Hoping CLady's ok. I've been thinking about her a lot today.
