0
   

Why would he say this?

 
 
Montana
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:09 am
That's perfect then. Be careful and get the hell out of there.
0 Replies
 
Debra Law
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:15 am
????
Crazielady420 wrote:
Slappy Doo Hoo wrote:
It's pretty easy to find roomates. Check out craigslist.com and roomates.com.

You'll feel a lot better when it's over with.
Actually I already had someone in mind..... we will just say he is an old friend


Are you leaping from the frying pan into the fire? I'm not sure what you're saying here, but if you're thinking about moving in with an old boyfriend . . . doing so could cause your current nut job boyfriend to fly into a frenzied rage . . . .

Perhaps I'm wrong, but I think you ought to be focusing on everyone's safety rather than doing something that possibly adds fuel to the fire.
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:16 am
That's great that you might have something lined up!

A quick word about being careful with this "old friend" -- you don't want to jump out of the frying pan and into the fire (or however that goes.) I have a sense that part of why you're with knife dude is because he was an escape from your parents' house. Now this guy is an escape from knife dude's house. Long-term, I'd strongly suggest that you get yourself in a place where can rely on yourself for these escapes rather than leaving yourself vulnerable in this way.

Good luck!!
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:16 am
Shocked Hadn't seen debra's!!!
0 Replies
 
Debra Law
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:18 am
thinking alike
Soz . . . we were thinking the same thing and posted at the same time . . . there must be something to it! Perhaps the "guardian angels" out there are trying to send crazielady420 a strong message!
0 Replies
 
sozobe
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:23 am
:-)
0 Replies
 
Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:33 am
thanks both of you, he is actually my best friend (and an ex)... but I could move in with him or my friend (whom is a girl)...

I don't know anymore, like I've said before, I am SOOOO confused right now.... When I went out last night I stopped by my ex's work place (the dude who's my friend too) and we talked for about an hour ( he took a break)... he has a girlfriend now (but he says it he isn't very happy with the relationship) and now all I can think about is him... and I feel really bad but my boyfriend now has driven me to the point where I just want to go out and have fun and be single but at the same time I don't want to loose what I have with him
0 Replies
 
Debra Law
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:40 am
Confusion? I understand your confusion, but SAFETY comes first. You are young. You will have lots of years left to "go out and have fun" if you take steps to ensure your safety.

Reread Brooke's post. You're not losing anything other than a possible death sentence.
0 Replies
 
Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:51 am
But I know he may get angry, but he is still such a good person... which makes it hard... because I really love him but I just hate his temper... and I know he won't change... but a part of me is not ready to let go!!
0 Replies
 
jpinMilwaukee
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 11:54 am
Getting angry and threatening somebody with a knife over a small and trivial matter is two different things. That isn't anger... that is scary.
0 Replies
 
FreeDuck
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 12:16 pm
Move in with the girl who is a friend. Then if you want to date ex later, you can do that without putting your home at risk.
0 Replies
 
JPB
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 12:48 pm
I agree with FreeDuck, unless the she-friend is the girlfriend of the ex boyfriend, now he-friend. In that case start over and check for wanted roommates or a temporary stop at Mom and Dad's.
0 Replies
 
Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 01:38 pm
I just want to scream!!!! Or go far far away for a little while and then come back and see how I feel, I am soooo stressed out about this... I know to everyone here the obvious choice is to leave him because of the knife situation and the danger.... and I know it isn't healthy for me to be with him anymore but a part of me needs him...

I have asked him if he would ever think about hurting me before and he tells me he can't promise anything! I know what that means but at least he is being honest.... he can't control his temper, even though he doesn't mean it.... So I know I could be in danger but at the same time it just doesn't seem to hit me like that,.,.. and I know I am in denial... but I am sooo scared to be without him... I am so confused!!! I just don't know anymore!
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 01:42 pm
Have you told real life friends and family about the knife incident, cLady? If nothing else, do so, so that they are prepared that something could happen to you - or that you may need to suddenly be with them, needing physical protection.

He has physically threatened others, he did not listen to you while doing so, he can't promise that he will not harm you. He needs help from a professional, before help has to come in the form of police intervention.

I am concerned that you might be in danger initially, if you choose to leave him. I wouldn't recommend living on your own for a while.
0 Replies
 
Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 01:45 pm
I have told friends, one was there when it happened(but she is "his friend") and I haven't told any family members because they'd freak out for obvious reasons and they would never ever let me hear the end of it, even if I had broke up with him that day, I am too scared to live alone anyways so that wouldn't happen.... he has gotten proffesional help and scared the guy away (or so he says)...
0 Replies
 
Debra Law
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 01:55 pm
Crazielady420 wrote:
I just want to scream!!!! Or go far far away for a little while and then come back and see how I feel, I am soooo stressed out about this... I know to everyone here the obvious choice is to leave him because of the knife situation and the danger.... and I know it isn't healthy for me to be with him anymore but a part of me needs him...

I have asked him if he would ever think about hurting me before and he tells me he can't promise anything! I know what that means but at least he is being honest.... he can't control his temper, even though he doesn't mean it.... So I know I could be in danger but at the same time it just doesn't seem to hit me like that,.,.. and I know I am in denial... but I am sooo scared to be without him... I am so confused!!! I just don't know anymore!


Crazielady420:

Sometimes you MUST divorce yourself from your emotions -- pack them away in a LOCKED trunk so they do not interfere -- make the decision that you intelligently KNOW is the right decision -- and then follow through with your decision.

When the time is right, you can unlock that trunk, and talk about your confused emotions with a professional. But right now, your emotions are paralyzing you and that is unacceptable. If you remain stuck in this emotional quagmire -- you will remain exactly there -- stuck and confused and a jumbled bundle of emotions. You must move forward because staying where you're at is not the answer to your present and future welfare.

Do what you need to do to save yourself and others from a person who has demonstrated (beyond a reasonable doubt) that he is a THREAT to himself and others. Love has nothing to do with your situation. Pick up the phone, dial the domestic violence crisis center, and talk to a counselor. Get yourself into a safe house. LEAVE.
0 Replies
 
Eva
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 03:14 pm
This is very scary, crazielady. There's a big difference between loving someone and being able to live with them. I've known several very lovable people who were hell to live with. I'll say a special prayer that you'll find the strength you need so you can do the right thing and find a safe place. This is no way to live.

(((((HUG)))))
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 03:24 pm
Crazielady420 wrote:
I haven't told any family members because they'd freak out for obvious reasons



If it's obvious, well, then, be smart about this.
Easier said than done, but it needs to be done.
Get out.
0 Replies
 
almach1
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 03:49 pm
No offense to the females, but do you have any brothers, cousins, or another household with a male presence that you can stay at. If you were my sister, that fool would be in alot of trouble if he showed up at my house.
0 Replies
 
Synonymph
 
  1  
Reply Fri 11 Feb, 2005 03:54 pm
Too bad restraining orders don't come with a barbed wire electrical fence.
0 Replies
 
 

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