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Question to married men who have anothe woman

 
 
Eliusa
 
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 07:42 am
Guys,
can anyone tell me if you (as a married man) had been in long term relationships with another woman because you 'drawn' to her and sex is great and everything is peachy - when you come back home to your wife - what are you looking for at home? Comfort, routine, old bedroom sleepers that you must have on your feet? What makes you cheat but still be with a woman just because she is your wife? Apparently if you are cheating - your wife doesn't cut it as a sex partner. Or if she is - why are you cheating?
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Type: Discussion • Score: 21 • Views: 19,394 • Replies: 297

 
jespah
 
  8  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 08:08 am
@Eliusa,
You honestly think that one size fits all in this area?

You're also making wild assumptions about the sexual prowess of these cuckolded wives. Perhaps they're awesome, and the guy's just a dick.
maxdancona
 
  4  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 08:11 am
@Eliusa,
Reading your questions, you seem to already have an answer in mind. I also think it is interesting that you only address this to men who cheat. Women cheat too. I would think the same questions apply to them.
0 Replies
 
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 08:27 am
@jespah,
I actually think this question is backwards. Humans aren't wired to be with the same person for decades. It isn't at all surprising that people cheat on their long term partners. Humans evolved with a sex drive for a good reason. Looking for other partners is natural.

What is amazing (or should I stay weird) is that there are actually people who don't cheat.
Eliusa
 
  3  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 08:44 am
@maxdancona,
Was that a joke? (your second post?) or you seriously think that? I think I could live with a same partner forever without looking anywhere as long as we have stuff to talk about. And sex.
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 08:54 am
@Eliusa,
Cheating is common, and many (if not most) people who don't give into the temptation find it difficult to stay faithful.

If the person you have been with for 20 years no longer satisfies you, which do you think is better; divorce or infidelity?

Many people choose divorce. But sometimes the fact that there are children and financial considerations makes infidelity a better choice.
Eliusa
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 09:12 am
@maxdancona,
'If the person you have been with for 20 years no longer satisfies you, which do you think is better; divorce or infidelity?'

This actually puts everything I was looking for in one sentence, however I am still wondering what is in men's head when they are all of a sudden flying off their 'husband' handle?
When it is not just a one night stay to get it out of the system, but actual second family. And then they are back to their wives?
izzythepush
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 09:19 am
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Captain's_Paradise
Eliusa
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 09:25 am
@izzythepush,
Wikipedia does not have an article with this exact name. Please search for The Captain& in Wikipedia to check for alternative titles or spellings.
0 Replies
 
maxdancona
 
  0  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 09:27 am
@Eliusa,
I can't help you with that one. I chose divorce (although there was more to the story in my case).

I didn't want to be married to one woman.... I can't imagine why any man in his right mind would want to be married to two. Does he have some sort of mental disorder?

timur
 
  3  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 09:29 am
Here's the link:
The captain's paradise
Eliusa
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 09:57 am
@timur,
And the point of this?
timur
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 10:01 am
@Eliusa,
You need to ask Izzy..
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 10:03 am
@izzythepush,
Brilliant response (when using timur's link)

Laughing
0 Replies
 
izzythepush
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 10:27 am
@Eliusa,
I think the Wiki page gives the gist of it, the captain has "the perfect life," tranquil domesticity in Gibraltar, an exciting life with a beautiful girlfriend in Morocco, and the company of men when aboard ship. Of course it all goes wrong.
Eliusa
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 10:31 am
@izzythepush,
And the point? It is just a fiction!
If I went by fiction literature - there would be nothing good if there weren't cheating in it. All best stories are about...cheating. Right?
izzythepush
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 10:34 am
@Eliusa,
If you don't get it now there's no point in explaining it. Fiction allows people to examine certain possibilities in the abstract.
Eliusa
 
  0  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 10:58 am
@izzythepush,
It had nothing to do with OP.
I didn't ask what will go wrong if you cheating. I KNOW THAT!
I had asked another question.
InfraBlue
 
  2  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 12:29 pm
@Eliusa,
Eliusa wrote:

It had nothing to do with OP.
I didn't ask what will go wrong if you cheating. I KNOW THAT!
I had asked another question.

The point is, a cheating man wants the best of both worlds.

He wants to have his cake and eat it too, as it were.
maxdancona
 
  1  
Reply Fri 22 Aug, 2014 01:00 pm
@InfraBlue,
Quote:
The point is, a cheating man wants the best of both worlds.

He wants to have his cake and eat it too, as it were.


You say that as if it is a bad thing. (Most men like cake.)

People who like cake shouldn't get married. If you aren't married, you can have all the cake you want.

0 Replies
 
 

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