My sisters in a pickle and not sure what to do?

Thank you ALL....... ((( HUGS Back)))

I don't even know what to say...she really blowed my mind with this. I should've seen it coming but I didn't want to face it.

Were all dropping it. She wants US to leave HER alone and let HER live HER life according to HER. So......we are leaving her alone. Everyone single one of us are done with her. Its not just this event, but it was divorce 5 months ago...the fact that her daughter was put into the hospital for two weeks due to basically having a nervous breakdown, the child is 12. Its the fact that she pulls the youngest child off his medication and then puts him back on it...(he's HDAD) I eat her alive over that here recently. The fact that having a man around is more important to her than her children. And the way she loves to lie and manipulate, to turn it back around on us...as if its our fault.

I re-read an earlier post that I wrote....About us not trying to be meddlesome...etc.

What that was about...there was none of us that had a good feeling about this boy...man, idiot.......and after two weeks of thier relationship......my cousin called me up and wanted to know what I thought about loverboy. I told her. We discussed my sister and loverboy...and some wishful thinking on our part about the whole situation. We didn't do anything other but have a friend run him...to see if the warrants were true. She called us ......

Wanna know the real kicker to this story? She's the one that called the LAW.....We didn't. 24 hours later, she's back with loverboy and he's back in the car....cruising around town like Big Daddy.....

So.......she loves him.......he loves her. And we were all warned that we were not to discuss her furthermore in any conversations. That SHE was off limits for a topic. Ok.........

We have decided basically that she's mentally unstable...what we do now...we have no idea. We had someone ask us the other day if she was on drugs? Humm, might be.......I didn't think she'd do alot of things, but apparently I'm wrong.

Thank you all for you help, advice......I'm letting it go and washing my hands of it. When he gets around to getting her hooked on dope, or boxing her jaws......and her kids taken away...maybe she'll find her true happiness. Cause God knows, its she's not finding happiness in her family that truly love her.....

I can see you giving up on her, but the KIDS! The last thing I would do before washing my hands of the situation is call CPS.

Yes, the kids.

I'm not giving up on the kids. I'm just not sure of my next move in that area.

Come to find out, she had a court date for having her child support raised. The issue on who is living in the house was brought up by the childrens father. He questioned the kids.

The daughter lied to the father and told my sister...and she run and dropped the court case. Fearing she'd loose her children......

So.....I'm not giving up in that area, just going to choose the battle wisely.....

mms--

Hold your dominion--with kids.

Frist off dose she have the car back. If not call the cops have it reported stolen. 2nd Have her get a restaing order put on him. Get her to tell the Judge
about his past history. Make a tip to the local cops that this losser is dealing drugs.

I wish I had a brother like you. I have three big brothers none of them or like you.

fireball--

Welcome to A2K.

Most of the posters on this thread are women.

Somehow, I missed this thread until now. What a mess.

MMS, you know your sister better than any of us. And you know if you're really fed up or just pissed off at the moment. Like you said, she IS your sister and you're not going to let anyone hurt her. Including her, if you can help it.

Do your best to look after her children. After all, they're the innocent ones here.

Oh well. That's your FAAAMMMLAY.

I've just read through this thread for the first time too. It's very sad.

It must be hard for you, your cousin, her kids and your mom. I know how frustrated you are but you've been doing the right things. Sounds like it's good that the kids are with her ex MIL for now.

Hi, Thanks everyone.

Ohhh HELL YEAH, were FRUSTRATED by HER. And not pissed now at the moment.

ITs been a very very frustrating time with her. I have never in my life come across someone to pig headed as not to take heed the advice that SHE asked for. But thats her perogitive......not ours.

I happen to be friends with alot of the Deputies for the County that we both reside in. She did let him have the car back. 24 hours later, after the law was called and he spent a few hours in jail, she took him out to where the car was hidden and gave it back to him. My question is why?

Anyway..........the Deputies, have been told what was going on. They know what I know...but what good that does, I won't know till its either over or she's run off with him. And I hate to say it, but I'm thinking that it might be the best thing she could possibly do. Let her go........is what I say. She'll leave the kids behind, matter of fact, we believe thats what she's looking to do anyway......is run.

But this is his mentality~~~> A few days ago, the deputies seen him cruising in that orange car, gave chase to him. (they had been looking for him, but didn't realize that the warrants had been served) He eluded them. My buddy heard it over the radio and told them her home address. They go there...... (3 deputies and cars) and have a talk with him...cite him for driving without a liscense. Here we go again.........I mean the IDIOT RUN FROM THEM!!!.......

Ohh yeah, another note on this lil situation. Loverboy...was even seen by me cruising the streets the other day. And to top that off, a few days ago...he was seen with another woman in the car that WAS NOT my sister. When she was told about it. Her reply was simply that it was a friend of his...SHE'S 16.......HE'S 30! UMMM, anyone see anything wrong with this picture. He even bragged to my sister before he come up here that he thought he had an 18 year old girl pregnant, but wasn't sure.

(I learn more and more all the time)

We've been asked many times in the last week if she was on drugs? I don't know........didn't think she'd do half of what she's done....so that leaves that wide open for discussion now.

Its just one big mess. I don't think I knew my sister as well as I thought that I did. She's lived 200 miles away from me for the last 6 years, up until 5 months ago, when she moved back. I honestly think down deep inside, I knew what and how she was, but didn't want to believe it. Now its hard to deny when its staring you in the face.

So...you can see, that this relationship spells disaster.....of her own makings. I have washed my hands of it.......

But the children......All I can say to that is, there are things in the works right now. I'm NOT going to let those children be treated like that.

Fireball~~~Psst! I'm a gurrrrlllll..........lol

Hang in there MMS and I'm so sorry to hear you going through all this. It must be very hard for you.

Thanks Montana...very much.

It is hard. My sister calls me everyday to talk. And I really don't have anything to say to her. I know it hurts her feelings just as much as it does mine to be that way with her. But I'm listening to someone that needs help. And after what all she has had to say about each one of us and all the lies that have come out into the open here recently, I can't let myself talk to her. I don't utter one word about anyone, I just uh humm her.......and thats it.

My mother called her the other day to talk to her about things. She just really got blunt with her about everything that has happened in the last 5 months. It didn't do any good...

My sister loves being the "victim" were finding out. She lays the blame on everyone but her...Its going to take alot of growing up on her part to face the facts head on. And I don't think she'll be prepared for it when the time comes.

She has alienated everyone that was close to her with this man that she has allowed to come into her life. And I know...it shouldn't be any of our business. It her life, she's the one that has to live it. BUT, there are 2 kids involved that I don't want to see hurt anymore than they have been. It breaks my heart to know that they don't have a mother standing ready for them, to hold them or to have as a mother to care for them. They didn't ask to get brought into this life, and shouldn't be asked or expected to be treated this way. Abuse is a viscous circle and it comes in varying forms. Where we were mentally, emotionally and physically abused, she's doing the same thing with her children. Some how, I was able to step out of those boundaries and rise up above it. There is no way on Gods Green Earth that I would EVER treat my children the way I was treated and I really thought she felt the same way about it.

But the fact is, she doesn't see it like that.

See, when she first got moved down here...she got a job and it was day shift. No nights. The kids started school and poof, she got herself moved to nights. She takes her kids to school in the morning and has all day free to do whatever she pleases. She is gone when they come home from school and its usually 9 or so before she gets home at night. So..MIL has them. It was her way of avioding having to tend to them. So........about 3 or 4 nights out of the week, she'll skip going to get them. Because her words to me were~~~~~~~"I take care of my kids!! What does it matter WHOSE house they sleep in?"

Ok.....maybe she's right. But I don't feel that she is.

~>Throwing hands up in the air again!

She doesn't physically abuse her children that I have seen, heard or known of.

I am atleast glad that the kids are not staying with her, which would be worse at this point, but I do feel very sorry for those poor children who must feel that their mommy doesn't care. The children are always the biggest victims in these situations and it's very sad.

MMS--

Every year at the State Fair there is a competition for Difficult Family Members. Nationwide, I think you sister may be blue-ribbon material.

Is there any chance she can get pregnant?

Well Noddy, she's got an IUD, but I'm sure she's not using any other protection with that.

Not smart, if you ask me...in this day and age of STD's that KILL.

You know what girlfriend? If you really can wash your hands of this chick, do it. She'll drag you and anyone else down with her if given half the chance. She's gotta hit rock bottom eventually, so all you can do is pray that the bottom won't be too, too ugly. That maybe she can make a come back somewhere down the road.

It's so hard dealing with twisted family members. Especially when you love them. Hang in there. I feel ya.

Thank you eoe....I understand it completely. I do hope that rock bottom isn't that ugly, but if its not...then she won't learn anything from it.

I just hate for her to have to go through all this. She has a family that does love her and wants to be there for her.

makemeshiver

i thought of you and your sister when this hit me in the face earlier today



http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/01/19/foster.abduction/

Make sure someone great, and strong, and tough, is taking care of your sister's kids.

ehbeth...thats the problem. They aren't strong ex-inlaws. They are there, they do whatever she wants. And I really don't think they would stand up to her if they had too. Even to the point of someone else holding the gun on them to make them stand up against her!

This past Christmas...get this! Instead of them having THIER son at thier house on Christmas. They had my sister and her loverboy there! They told him they'd soon visit with her and the kids than him!

But I have a funny story to tell on this romance from hell.

Sister is the one who called the law! Sister is the one that wants EVERYONE TO LEAVE HER ALONE! WAAA WAAA WAAAA Let Her live HER life the way she wants too. WEll...GUESS WHERE LOVERBOY IS? Back in JAIL!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH


Ask me why? Cause of the phone call she made 10 days ago. They picked him back up again on the child support issue and he's there till a court date.

So.......I call it Poetic Justice! She's alienated EVERYONE. And has no one...not even loverboy now...........HAHAHAHAHA

I know...shame on me. That'll probably come back to bite me in the butt, but she didn't want anyone but him and now she can't have him...lol