My wife's affair and her lack of desire towards me now

Germlat,
I thought you said that post in my thread will be the last one.
Leave me alone, please.

No one really knows if that guy still have her motors going.
She dumped him pretty quickly.
Maybe she is not all that sexual at all but understands it is not good for a family and she is just 'working' that sex for her husband.
Is this a possibility that she is frigid but kind and caring?
No one says she has hots for the other man still. So she might just not.
She is 28. My own sexuality slept until 48!

If you're posting about someone else the rules change....your post your rules. I can give my opinions freely..different thread see.b stop giving advice to others when you can't figure out your own life!!

This is to answer a post in April and I've not read up since then; here's the link to the exact post -
http://able2know.org/topic/240140-4#post-5629829

I had, and have, a feeling of being told things you don't think I know.
You may figure I'm defensive as a "cheater" when I talk about complexities, cheater a word I take as perjorative in the first place, which could be part of what vikorr was getting at back then re blame and all that, but many people use that for their own good reason re their beliefs, their vows.

I didn't 'cheat' in my marriage of circa 25 years, so I'm not defensive - I just know a lot of people with tales to tell of their lives and can understand a lot of whys, also known as complexities.

May have more to say when I read the rest of the thread.

Please, do tell me if you ever felt your wife was very sexually aroused with you by you? Maybe you 2 had a nice quiet sex before an affair and you weren't so crazy as you are after an affair.
Maybe being mild like she is now - is her way that she always had been?

Another think I am suspecting is that being not so sex crazy she had decided to see if it is you. And had an affair...
But you said it yourself she dumped him as soon as you wanted her to stop it. Right? So there was no value in that man for her.

What if its just your hurt feelings imagination about her being colder than before?
I am just hoping you are going to be cured, both, soon.

You made me laugh.. which is unusual since I rarely even read your takes anymore.

You named your thread "50 in love "...REMEMBER
And BTW, I don't care if others agree with me. You're confused....refrain from giving others advice....you're cheating...even if you haven't had sex, which I doubt.

We all have our own opinion don't we. Sometimes...people are about to make a huge mistake though rationalizing it. I make no apologies to my posts. People know all they need to know often...but, they don't want to be reminded.

I am not Eliusa.

Please direct your reply to the person you are responding to.

That may be, but you directed your lecturing instruction to me, twice now. Consider using the REPLY TO ALL button, if not the person you are responding to.

Not twice...first was for the shameless female using her husband as a meal- ticket , the next was appropriately for you. BTW--an opinion is not lecturing instruction...

Yes, but you lectured me with your opinion, by putting your corrective informational post to me.


quoting,
@ossobuco,
There are many studies on the issue of cheating. Relationships are complex. Some people think the ability to articulate your thoughts, makes you an efficient communicator. The ability to listen and interpret makes you a good communicator. Facial expressions, body language, all these things matter. Also it's important to remember some people are introverted vs extroverted. [Some people just want to win the argument, in spite of what the processed message is. I still think cheating is never ok..it's dishonest.]

Quit lecturing me, it is getting annoying. I am not four years old. I'm the one who said all this can be complex.

So your holding a grudge over an old post?? Wow! That's sad. I don't consider utilizing a study as wrong when using it as info. I don't have a problem with it, if it's valid when others are communicating with me. " I'm the one who said all this can be complex."---That wasn't any kind of profound, enlightening statement...we all came to that conclusion.

Answering the April post is not a grudge. I do wonder why you address me as a learner at your knee who didn't know about complexity or facial expressions and so on. Criminy.

Addressing the thread at large would be less grating.

See, that's were we differ...that's all on you. Much ado about nothing...I can't help your reaction to my personality. If you don't care for it ..put me on ignore.

Eh.

And THESE people are advising me on how to live? Now I am ROFLMAO!
Thanks for the laughs, Germlat!!!
Maybe YOU need to get laid. Ever thought of it?

I don't use anyone as a meal-ticket .,I'm good with that. You are instead worried if your daughter finds out about your affair...it'll end up in PARENT alienation. You don't have a clue and are as narcissistic as they come...

And you don't pay attention when you read because I am slaving in my business so no one is using anyone as a meal ticket.
I said it 10 times but you are just following me and keep telling me the same stupid thing about me being narcissistic. LOL

So, I guess since you still want my opinion, you must have it....I maintain you're afraid to be on your own financially and don't give a crap about your daughter or your husband.