Tue 30 Jun, 2009 07:38 pm
This Saturday night I went to a party. I knew a few people, but it was a pretty big party so there were many people who I didn't know at all. At one point I was walking through the crowd and suddenly there she was, a dark-haired cutiepie, standing in front of me, looking right at me. So I said "Hi!" and we started talking. She soon mentioned that she works Tuesdays through Saturdays, and I said, "oh, what do you do?"
"I'm a stripper."
"Get the hell out of here," I said.
She laughed, but she didn't say that she wasn't one. And after talking to her for another hour or so before she finally left, I still had no idea whether she was bullshitting me or not. She also told me she had three kids from three different fathers, and that when she went out she would give them benadryl to knock them out so she wouldn't have to get a babysitter. She even gave me the names of the kids and of each one's father! But she seemed so sweet and innocent, so I kept joking with her that everything she was telling me was bullshit, and she kept laughing and not contradicting me.
So I called tonight, and the number she gave me was actually her real number, which was surprising in and of itself. And when I asked her whether she had called in sick from the strip joint, she told me she doesn't go on until midnight. Then I asked her where her kids were, and she said they were all with their dads. No hesitation. No pause to think of a plausible lie at all. We made a date to meet for brunch this weekend, and I told her I have to know the truth about her. She said she might tell me a little bit more, but she is still sticking with her original story at this point.
So what do you think the story is here? Is she a stripper or what? And if she is, am I a lucky sonofabitch or what?!
Oh, bullshit Kicky . . . i think you're lying . . . in fact, i think you compulsively lie when you tell us about your social life . . . it's like it's pathological or something . . .
I find it odd that anyone would do lithography in the middle of the night.
@ebrown p,
ebrown p wrote:
I find it odd that anyone would do lithography in the middle of the night.
oh, that's not odd at all. 3 shifts and the graveyard pays a differntial.
obviously you know nothing about the print business. my ex-husband was the supervisor of the 2nd shift, and had 4 strippers under him. I can assure you that when he was letting his strippers, go home, 3 or 4 more were just getting started.
@kickycan,
I don't know who is lying right now. I hope mame, chai, or shewolf see this thread. They would be able to get the truth out of you, kickycan.
Edit: Chai just posted but she is addressing ebrown.
@kickycan,
Quote:
Is she a stripper or a pathological liar?
The two are not mutually exclusive categories.
I see two red flags: I think she is lying because the odds of all three fathers taking all three kids at the same time is like hitting the lottery three times in a row. I also think the odds of someone wanting to go out to brunch after a night of stripping is not realistic. I would think she would just want to go home to sleep- alone. However, she must be interested in you or she would not give you her real number or agree to meet with you again. If she is telling the truth, it does mean you will be sharing her lap dances with a lot of different men and I can't imagine that is very appealing, but hey what do I know, I'm only a woman. Good luck, Sherlock.
@Merry Andrew,
A pathological stripper? (Now that's a possibility I have never imagined before this.)
@Setanta,
Setanta wrote:
Oh, bullshit Kicky . . . i think you're lying . . . in fact, i think you compulsively lie when you tell us about your social life . . . it's like it's pathological or something . . .
No really. I
am dating a cute stripper...yeah, yeah, that's the ticket...
@kickycan,
has she got a sister, kick?
mebbe we could do a double...
(i don't have enough stress in my life right now, ya know?)
@Green Witch,
This is really weird, isn't it? Why would she stick with that story, even now, on the phone? I think she might actually be a stripper. Most of what she told me about her kids kind of felt like bullshit to me too. But hey, what the hell, it's only brunch. And she's really cute. What could it hurt to have a little brunch with a really cute girl who may or may not be a stripper?
Damn kicky.
I will be there in a few weeks.
couldnt wait could ya?
Stripper.
jeezee... dont do emotionally stable much do ya ? haha
@Rockhead,
I will ask her about the sister possibilities, my friend, don't you worry. Wow, I can't believe I might be going out on a date with a stripper!
A stripper who drugs her three kids from three different fathers...? This reminds me of that old Dear Abby joke...you know, the one where a guy who's worried about losing his fiancee lists all these truly awful secrets about his life and THEN asks, "Should I tell her about my brother in Advertising?"
I think she's having a good time with you. Congratulations, Kicky, I think you've finally met a girl who shares your sense of humor.
Man, I was so nervous on the phone tonight. Mainly because I went into it thinking I was going to joke with her and she'd finally tell me the truth that she really isn't a stripper and then we'd both have a good laugh. But she stuck with the story, and didn't even laugh or sound like she was kidding at all when she talked about it.
When I asked her out she said, "What do you have in mind?" and I had absolutely nothing in mind at all. I don't know what the hell made me decide on Brunch. I never have brunch. Is brunch a good idea for a date with a stripper? Oh my god, if she is a stripper I'll be so intimidated. How do you talk to a stripper?
@kickycan,
This thread somehow reminds me of a Seinfeld episode...
Quote:In my country, they speak of a man so virile, so potent, that to spend a night with such a man is to enter a world of sensual delights most women dare not dream of. This man is known as "the comedian." You may tell jokes, Mr. Jerry Seinfeld, but you are no comedian.
I am not sure if this fits or not.
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