Roberta
 
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:00 pm
A crush--an intense infatuation. I've have more than my fair share. On boys in my class at school. In the neighborhood. Around. Almost always unattainable.

Even as an adult, I still get crushes --usually an actor or singer.

Of all the crushes I've had, only two lasted. I still have them.

My first crush was on Elvis. I remember the first time I saw him. I was ten. I remember all the details of the room and the company as I watched a small black-and-white tv screen and saw HIM on the Dorsey show (can't remember if it was Tommy or Jimmy). He got my juices flowing, my heart pounding, my somthing somethinged. I was obsessed. I got Elvis 78s. Elvis bubble gum cards. Elvis picture books. I sat on the floor in front of the first row of the movie theater that showed his first movie--Love Me Tender. Why on the floor? Because girls came to the theater to see him and wouldn't leave. But management kept letting people in.

When I was in college, Elvis was out--but not with me. I snuck off to see his terrible movies.

I forgave him his Vegas persona. His goofy outfits. His horrible arrangements. I forgave him everything.

When he died, I sat in my apartment in the dark on the floor in front of the radio listening to his music being played and crying like a baby.

My major second crush--not quite as intense but just as enduring--was on Paul Newman. I met him once. I couldn't speak. Couldn't breathe. Couldn't function. I still get all soft and gooey when I think about him. See his films. Sigh.

What is this phenomenon? Is it more specific to girls than boys? Am I unusual in having such a sustained fascination? What's your take on this? Anybody else have a crush for fifty years? Or one that's lasted? Or one you want to talk about?

(BTW, I think I'm a sucker for blue eyes.)
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Type: Discussion • Score: 23 • Views: 16,646 • Replies: 159

 
ossobuco
 
  3  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:17 pm
@Roberta,
Great topic. I have no idea re girls' crushes and boys' crushes, younger or with age.

I had some crushes in elementary school (ours went to eighth grade, and for me they were more intense at eighth grade level). My first major crush from afar was a near pathological case of sublimation. I was in love with Notre Dame's quarterback, Paul Hornung, then quite a handsome lad. I was undergoing the good sisters telling me I was called to be a nun, and so I constantly prayed for him. This all passed but it took quite a while. (p.s., my prayers didn't work.)

I've had other crush situations but they were more 'crazy in love with in real life' episodes, than what I think you are talking about.

Musicians, not so much. Movie stars.. thinking. I've appreciated lots, offhand, Dirk Bogarde, early Albert Finney, early Gerard Depardieu, early Tom Conti, but they weren't wild mad crushes. I think I'm too old now, apprehend the human condition too much for the real, unjaundiced crush phenomenon.

Eva
 
  3  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:25 pm
@ossobuco,
Ooh, I have to disagree with you, Osso. There's no such thing as being "too old" to be infatuated with someone. People can "fall in love" when they're 90 just like they did in their teens. It may be less likely, but it happens.
shewolfnm
 
  3  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:32 pm
Im living in one of those types of crushes now.
And it works wonders to remind you of just how human you really are.


Crushes are lovely
Roberta
 
  3  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:33 pm
osso, If you've got a crush on somebody who then enters your actual life, I think that stops being a crush and starts being something else. Even if the feelings are the same or similar, the relationship is different. I once had a crush on someone. We linked up. I was in love. No more crush.

eva, I agree. Never too old. I flip the channels. See someone who catches my eye. Get interested in a distant, fleeting way. Old? Maybe. Dead? Not yet.
0 Replies
 
Roberta
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:34 pm
@shewolfnm,
Living in a crush. How glorious. Yup, we're human alright.
0 Replies
 
gustavratzenhofer
 
  5  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:42 pm
Her name was Sheila. I had been driving through Utah in the summer of '87 and the traffic suddenly slowed because a plethora of sheep were causing disruption. I gently applied my brakes to avoid hitting the two small cars in front of me that were tailing a motor home. At that moment Sheila broke free from the herd and approached my truck. Our eyes met. I am not ashamed to admit that the sight of her caused a noticeable bulge in my trousers and I shifted position, uncomfortably, and embarrassingly, so as to not cause her to notice my predicament. I was startled to realize that she had noticed and not only did she not avert her gaze -- she actually wet her lips in anticipation!

http://www.anntorrence.com/blog/at-images/sheep_2093.jpg

I slowed down my truck, leaned over to the passenger door, and swung it open. "Get in, babe", I said, as my breath now came in labored gasps.

But then, just as she put her front hooves on the the seat of my truck and struggled to climb aboard, a semi horn sounded behind us and she fell backwards and rolled into the ditch, her eyes locked into mine as her lithe body tumbled backwards and eventually disappeared from sight in the prickly undergrowth.

I had to speed up to avoid being crushed by the semi and as I glanced in my rear-view mirror I saw Sheila climbing from the ditch and bleating in desperate tones for me to return.

But, alas, I had to make Kansas City by sundown and I hit the accelerator. I never did fulfill my sexual desires with Sheila -- never did run my fingers through her thick wool and whisper sweet nothings in her ear -- but I did, for that one glorious moment, have a crush on her.

And I will never forget that moment in time.

Thanks for the thread, Roberta. I needed this to cleanse my soul.
Eva
 
  4  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 05:49 pm
@gustavratzenhofer,
While I am thrilled to hear that you finally have a clean soul, Gus (a clean anything for that matter), I wouldn't call that a crush. You and Sheila had a mutual attraction.

I think of "crushes" more as unrequited infatuations.

What do the rest of you think?
Izzie
 
  3  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:07 pm
@Roberta,
Oh my..... yes yes yes

http://i277.photobucket.com/albums/kk41/LzzieIzzie/trinity1.jpg

When I was a kid I watched a Spaghetti Western... and fell in love with the blue eyed fella....

oooooooooooooooooh <swoons>

blue eyed cowboys a! oooooooooooh Dys.... where are you!!!! (not that I like you of course)! Wink
shewolfnm
 
  4  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:15 pm
@Izzie,
oh yes.
Blue eyes do something dont they..

Blue eyes, brown skin, black or dark brown hair.

oh dear........
Izzie
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:17 pm
@shewolfnm,
oh dear....

Blue eyes, brown skin, blonde hair!!!! oh.... and a hat of course! Does it for me!

(we gotta talk gal.... need to find my mic - ack!)
0 Replies
 
gustavratzenhofer
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:19 pm
http://www.gravatar.com/avatar/3cec6c4ccb4fce467798eff3aa40554a?r=R&d=identicon&s=180
I am a sucker for pure beauty, and, although I have no clue who this woman is, I have a such an intense crush on her that my very being is threatened.

Who, pray tell, is this woman? And why does she torment me so?
gustavratzenhofer
 
  3  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:21 pm
Look at those lips! Christ on a cracker!
Izzie
 
  1  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:24 pm
@gustavratzenhofer,
shewolfnm wrote:

Whewww

And Im not really a girl!

That feels SOOO good to get off my chest..


Surprised
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:27 pm
@Eva,
Get back to me when you're my age, Eva! I know love in real life happens whenever. I just don't think I'll be completely zoned out - or zoned in as the case may be - about some movie star, or, more in my line, writer.
shewolfnm
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:34 pm
@gustavratzenhofer,
gustavratzenhofer wrote:

Look at those lips! Christ on a cracker!


You can thank my plastic surgeon..

he did a good job
0 Replies
 
ossobuco
 
  1  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:34 pm
@ossobuco,
Ah, unrequited infatuations. That's pretty good. I'm more likely to have that in real life than re a star of some sort. But I think it would move on, one way or another, from infatuation, fairly fast.

No time to tarry.. as my grandmother might have said.
0 Replies
 
shewolfnm
 
  0  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 06:53 pm
@gustavratzenhofer,
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3233/2815291965_504238b5bf.jpg

Reeeooowww Mi Amore..

Te Quiero Puto.. >muah
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 07:35 pm
@gustavratzenhofer,
gustavratzenhofer wrote:
I am not ashamed to admit that the sight of her caused a noticeable bulge in my trousers ...


Hon, I think you're exaggerating slightly
0 Replies
 
Ragman
 
  3  
Reply Sun 31 Aug, 2008 07:39 pm
Tuesday Weld (Dobie Gillis TV show character Thalia Menninger )
Michelle Phillips (Mamas & Poppas)
Salma Hayek (pre recent 2007 pregnancy)
Halle Berry
Marina Sirtis (STNG - Counselor Deanna Troi)
http://www.imdb.com/media/rm1920834048/nm0000642
 

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