One of the flimsy silver linings in the Middle East is that counseling is losing its stigma in the armed forces.
i do not believe that there will be any negative side effects
im not trying to work anything out any more. i read an email she wrote to a guy where she told him she was sorry she didnt tell him she was married, and that she is not seperated and in the process of a getting a divorce. she told him we were only married for 2 months (the 22nd of this month makes 4) and that i was physically and verbialy abusive. that i can not stand for. she is pretty much cheating on me. So it is over.
again..
are you SURE there is no way to remove yourself , or HER from the situation until you can seperate completely?
Can you really stomach living with her, knowing she is, was, and will continue, cheating?
The net effects of cheating vary from couple to couple; for some it defines an unequivocal end for others not so. Whatever happens Seed, stand tall and don't take it lying down (unless you're outside being the gentleman)!
Sorry to read that, Seed. Ok, now will you contact an attorney?
Actually, much as I say that, you should ask around. I am sort of without doubt the armed forces could have what they call ambulance-chasers hanging around, given the difficulties going on, back in the states.
But, from a non involved person, you do need to speak with someone who can bring you up to speed on all this. So, watch your ass.
Consider looking up stuff on line re a) the armed forces, b) your particular state, before you go into any office, any where. Not to scare you, but heads up.
Not to freak you, but research online could be fortifying. Look at varied sites, as some might have sucky-in ways about them.
Sorry to hear that, Seed.
Looks like it's really over.
Crap! Now you have to wonder about the baby.
I'm glad you could talk to someone "in-house" so to speak, and not have it affect your military service record. PLEASE, DO! I know just typing it out can be therapeutic, help organize thoughts, and hitting "submit" helps make it real... But, talking to someone in real life is even better.
Seed:
Selecting an Attorney to Handle a Military Divorce
I urge you to seek legal counsel.
Yesterday.
Seed--
Quote:im not trying to work anything out any more. i read an email she wrote to a guy where she told him she was sorry she didnt tell him she was married, and that she is not seperated and in the process of a getting a divorce. she told him we were only married for 2 months (the 22nd of this month makes 4) and that i was physically and verbialy abusive. that i can not stand for. she is pretty much cheating on me. So it is over.
You married a stranger. You fell in love with a woman who didn't really exist. That part of your life is over.
Now: See a lawyer. You know now that the woman you married has no intention of playing fair. You don't want to be unfair to her, but you don't want to be cheated any more.
If you want custody of the baby, you should start the arrangements now. The poor sucker she's corresponding with probably doesn't want your baby--and you do.
Hold your dominion.
Lots of good advice here, Seed. There's nothing like a good dose of anger to help you move out of the pit you're in. Take advantage of your anger and put it to use in a positive direction for your future and the future of your child.
I'm sorry this is so painful for you.
Last I remember eoe, that had to be in a truly desperate situation.
Most of the times, you just have to wait for the birth of the baby to get the DNA test.
She has said that she doesn't even want the child. Get her to say that on tape before she changes her mind and starts crying her eyes out in the courtroom saying how much she loves it and how bad you've been to her.
ok, that is pretty sneaky
but you have an excellent idea.
One that may help with the long drawn out custody / divorce /property battle .
But if she's taped w/o her knowledge, it will be considered inadmissable, right?
Personally I hate the whole idea of even getting lawyers involved in a divorce, but from what I hear of her I don't give her the credit of the necessary moral fiber I to resolve things privately. When it comes to your kids' future, you've just got to do what it takes. In this case it seems clear that your child would be better loved by you, Seed...which is why I suggest getting the necessary evidence now while it is up for grabs and holding on to it just in case.
