@Kara,
It wasn't shaggy enough Kara. You made it £5000, a ridiculous idea, in order to get it over with quick.
@spendius,
£500 would have been stretching credulity past its limits.
@spendius,
Hey, you didn't see her. Maybe she was one hot chick. The recession has gotcha, spendius...5,000 wasn't anything a few years ago.
A young nun enters a convent, where she can only utter two words every ten years. After the first decade, she visits Mother Superior and says, "bed hard."
Ten years later, she says, "food bad." After 30 years, she goes to the Mother Superior and says, "I quit."
"I'm not surprised," says Mother Superior. "You've been complaining ever since you got here."
Do ya know the difference between a hamster and a gerbil?
There's more dark meat on a hamster.
The first president of South Korea, Syngman Rhee, had one (adopted) son, Rhee In Soo (in the Korean style of surname first). His son became very Americanized after the CIA whisked him out of Korea in 1960, and by the end of the decade had become a prominent photographer for Life magazine. He photographed the war in Vietnam, smugglers in Macao, the aftermath of a bloody coup in what was then Ceylon, and was traveling across sub-Saharan Africa to Mali when he disappeared. For years, nobody knew what became of him. His father offered a substantial reward for anyone who could find his son, which is how it was that a South African explorer whose name does not appear in Wikipedia was moved to track the young man down. He searched through Mali, Cote d'Ivoire, Ghana, and Burkina Faso, picking up clues here and there, which ultimately led him to join a trade caravan that crossed West Africa and ended up in a remote village in Senegal. When he arrived, there, sitting in front of a simple daub-and-wattle hut, was his quarry at last. And he said, "Ah, sweet Mr. Rhee of Life, at last I've found you!"
@Region Philbis,
What? That was a bad joke but a good play on words..
@nimh,
nimh, that is outrageous.
@nimh,
I read one of those yesterday that is almost as bad:
Quote:Mahatma Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him... a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
@Robert Gentel,
That's so bad you made my teddy bear come to life just so she could faint from how bad that joke was.
@Robert Gentel,
Robert Gentel wrote:
I read one of those yesterday that is almost as bad:
Quote:Mahatma Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and, with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him... a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.
There is definitely no god.
>
>Little Mexican kid (having read about Pancho Villa in his history/civics
>class):
>
>"Gran-pappito, deed you eevar geet to meet Pancho VILLA, who was de worstest
>bandito in all of Mexico?
>
>Old man sitting on rocker on varenda:
>
>"You know, dat question takes me back... I was about feefteen yeers old
>an I was walkin' across de desert weef de two leetle burritos all
>loaded weef corn to sell de corn at de market, an come a beeg clouda'
>dust an up come Pancho Villa an about feefteen or twentya hees banditos,
>an he gotta beeg beer belly an bullet belts goin across de beer belly
>boof ways ana beeg ceegar een hees mouf, an he pull outta peestol an
>point de peestol at one-a-da leedle burritos, an say: 'Hookay burro,
>SHEET!!', an de leetle burro was plenty scared so he sheet hisself, an
>dan he point de peestol at me an he say: 'Hookay, peone, now YOU gonna
>EEEET de burro sheet!' an he laf plenty hard...
>
>"CARAMBA, gran-pappito, what deed you do?"
>
>"I was plenty scared, so I eet de burro sheet, taste plenty bad, an den a
>beeg gust of wind come up an blow de sand in Pancho Villa's face so he
>canna see, an he drop de peestol, an I grab de peestol an point de
>peestol at Pancho Villa's horse, an say: 'Hokay, horse, SHEEET!' an he
>do dat, an den I point de peestol at Pancho Villa an say: 'Hokay meester
>beeg shot bandito, now you gonna EEEEET de horse sheet, an I mean every
>bite, an not leev nottin left over!!', an Pancho Villa was plenty scared
>so he do jus' dat, an de odder banditos laff plenty hard...
>
>An so my leedle fren, you ask me eef I eevar geet to meet Pancho VILLA,
>who was the worstest bandito in all of Mexico? WHY, we had LUNCH
>togeddar!!!!!"
>
@gungasnake,
That joke is a lot older than you are, Gunga. In fact, I think it's even older than me. I must have been 10 or 11 when I first heard it and that would be somewhere about 60 years ago.
@nimh,
Actually, I think yours is worse.
It's a damn close thing, thing though.
@dlowan,
What game do you play with a wombat?
Wom.
@dlowan,
What's invisible and smells like carrots?
Rabbit farts
