My Christmas shopping delivery just arrived. The driver said: "We've had to substitute two items with this sprig of rosemary and a haddock." "Ah no," I replied. "This is neither the thyme nor the plaice."
Going to change my will so my wife gets everything on the condition that she has to remarry within the year.
I want at least one person to be sorry that I died.
@Wilso,
Not bad Wilso. Not bad at all,
What do you call karate for amputees?
Partial arts.
What’s the difference between Iron man and Iron woman?
One’s a superhero, and one’s a command.
How did the blonde break her legs while she was raking leaves?
She fell out of the tree.
How does Bob Marley like his doughnuts?
With jam in.
Thanks to the person who explained to me the definition of the word plethora.
It means a lot.
I watched a documentary on weed last night.
I think that's how I'll watch all documentaries from now on.
