@Wilso,
Wilso wrote:
I’m worried about my friend who hoards magazines. I think he has issues.
Some of your recent jokes are pitiful...and deserve to be in this thread.
BUT..."
My wife threatened to smash my face into the keyboard if I don’t get off the computer. She sounds angry but I think she’s jokigfsgrgs7(67&rbnfuy"... is classic.
I laughed my ass off! It does not belong here!
My wife just left me. She says my life revolves around the football and she's sick of it… I'm quite upset. We were together for 7 seasons!
I was in the fish and chip shop and saw a very pretty young Mum spank her kids' bottom for chucking chips on the floor... So I chucked my chips on the floor!
@Frank Apisa,
I laughed out loud, you're right Frank.
Lance isn't a common name these days.
But in medieval time people were named Lance a lot.
I was doing up my trousers but got distracted singing along to Disney songs...
And now I’ve zippered me doo-dah!
Old MacDonald had a police radio,
Echo India Echo India Oscar...
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I have to say that the urge for me to sing 'The Lion Sleeps Tonight' is always just a whim away...
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Man-the doctor said I should touch myself whenever I feel like it.
Wife-No, he said you could have a stroke at any time.
I phoned the ‘Cannabis Helpline Service’, it said ‘For more information press the hash key’…
People have often asked me why I wanted to become a film editor.
Well, to cut a long story short...
A study showed that 9 out of 10 husbands agreed that their wives are always right...
The 10th one hasn't been seen since the study was conducted!
@glitterbag,
Most of his jokes don't belong here
He's got a lot of great ones!
@Mame,
Ever since I employed Spiderman as a chauffeur he's been driving me up the wall.
A friend asked me to play the part of Brutus in an upcoming play about Julius Caesar. I said I'd take a stab at it
My Spanish bodybuilder friend told me he's run out of protein powder... I thought “no whey Jose’!”
Did you hear about the big Lego sale?
People were lined up for blocks.
I once dated a girl with one leg shorter than the other. Her name was Eileen.
My wife is thinking of leaving me because of my obsession with poker.
But I think she's bluffing.
Bought a new deodorant stick today.
The instructions read: REMOVE WRAPPER AND PUSH UP THE BOTTOM PART.”
I can hardly walk now....
but whenever I fart, the room smells great
Our neighbour's dog shat in our garden, so the missus told me to get a shovel and throw it over the fence... I don't see what that solved, we've still got dog **** in our garden and the neighbours now have our shovel!
@Wilso,
Maybe you should start a Wilso Comedy thread
