201
   

Really bad jokes - don't be afraid to post yours here

 
 
DrewDad
 
  4  
Reply Mon 7 Dec, 2020 09:10 am
"The Owls have a spy in our midst!"

"Who?"

<narrows eyes>
0 Replies
 
hingehead
 
  8  
Reply Tue 8 Dec, 2020 06:45 am
A priest, a minister and a Rabbit walk into a blood bank.

The rabbit says...... I think I might be a type o.
0 Replies
 
Builder
 
  -2  
Reply Thu 10 Dec, 2020 03:24 pm
A good old Aussie bloke was standing at a bar when a beautiful woman came up beside him, so he leans over and says, "You remind me of my little toe"
She replies, "What?... You mean I'm small and cute?"

He says "No, I mean I`ll probably bang you on the coffee table later when I'm drunk"
0 Replies
 
Frank Apisa
 
  5  
Reply Mon 14 Dec, 2020 02:33 pm
https://imageproxy.ifunny.co/crop:x-20,resize:640x,quality:90x75/images/00952256e52f2e48caf6ea5bb6a6363512451a1c0ae4a0d6e45776aeb4dc4885_1.jpg
0 Replies
 
Phoenix32890
 
  5  
Reply Wed 16 Dec, 2020 08:11 pm
What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is a heavy mammal and one is a little lighter.
BillW
 
  2  
Reply Wed 16 Dec, 2020 08:18 pm
@Phoenix32890,
Phoenix32890 wrote:

What's the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is a heavy mammal and one is a little lighter.

I really like that one Phoenix!
0 Replies
 
lmur
 
  5  
Reply Thu 24 Dec, 2020 01:03 pm
My wife told me that 'sex is better on holidays.'

True perhaps, but still the worse postcard I've ever got.
0 Replies
 
lmur
 
  5  
Reply Fri 25 Dec, 2020 11:29 am
'Thank you Santa! A donor heart that's a perfect match! This is the best Christmas present ever!'

She rang her twin sister to share the good news. No answer.
eurocelticyankee
 
  3  
Reply Fri 25 Dec, 2020 03:34 pm
Daddy what's a transvestite?

- Ask Mommy, he knows.
0 Replies
 
eurocelticyankee
 
  2  
Reply Fri 25 Dec, 2020 03:35 pm
What is cold and stands under a street lamp?

- A frostitute.

0 Replies
 
glitterbag
 
  1  
Reply Fri 25 Dec, 2020 06:25 pm
@lmur,
lmur wrote:

'Thank you Santa! A donor heart that's a perfect match! This is the best Christmas present ever!'

She rang her twin sister to share the good news. No answer.


first I laughed, then I felt a little ashamed of myself, then I laughed again......I'm going to hell.
lmur
 
  2  
Reply Sat 26 Dec, 2020 02:58 am
@glitterbag,
Keep a seat warm for me.
Walter Hinteler
 
  3  
Reply Sat 26 Dec, 2020 05:31 am
@lmur,
Due to the pandemic, you can only get in if you make a personal reservation online.

https://i.imgur.com/dOpM7uf.jpg

I've got my ticket already.

0 Replies
 
crackedhead
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Dec, 2020 01:22 am
One Trump supporter is bad enough. Two Trump supporters can't be found. Three Trump supporters is all it takes to make the world retarded
roger
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Dec, 2020 02:21 am
@crackedhead,
If you can't find two around here, you are either not reading much or you're very new.
0 Replies
 
crackedhead
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Dec, 2020 02:45 am
The only thing worse than COVID is being a Trump supporter. At least COVID knows how to kill fast. Trump supporters kill like AIDS, slow and annoying.
0 Replies
 
crackedhead
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Dec, 2020 04:14 am
How many Trump supporters does it take to eradicate COVID?

Hopefully all of them
0 Replies
 
crackedhead
 
  1  
Reply Sun 27 Dec, 2020 04:59 am
What whines about life not being fair more than your kids?

Trump supporters
farmerman
 
  3  
Reply Sun 27 Dec, 2020 07:15 am
@crackedhead,
You really are sticking to the spirit of this thread. I must congratulate you
Frank Apisa
 
  3  
Reply Sun 27 Dec, 2020 08:49 am
@farmerman,
farmerman wrote:

You really are sticking to the spirit of this thread. I must congratulate you


I was going to post something of that sort, but better to just get this thing back on track:

A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender..."Gimme a whiskey and...ahhh...ahhh...

...ummm...soda.

Bartender asks, "Why the long pause?"

Bear answers, "I dunno...I was born with 'em."
 

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