@McGentrix,
I wrote it that way first, but changed it. It's better spoken than written down.
@TomTomBinks,
Agreed. Hope I didn't offend, TomTom
@TomTomBinks,
TomTomBinks wrote:
I wrote it that way first, but changed it. It's better spoken than written down.
So many things are like that.
You know what has no point?
Circles.
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
"She is the one who sells the candy."
@chirchri,
A guy walks into a diner and orders a cup of coffee without cream. The ditsy waitress rushes to get it for him but soon returns, apologetic. "I'm sorry sir; we're out of cream. Would you like to have your coffee without sugar instead?"
@TomTomBinks,
Q. What do you call the Emperor of Farts?
A. Gaseous Maximus.
~~~
Eagle vs Shark (2007)
@tsarstepan,
because he's cold? (dead cold)
Perhaps, 'cause he has got a hole in one?
During WW2, Hitler's grandfather clock stopped working causing him sleepless nights as it's ticking was of great comfort to him over many years.
A POW was pressed into service. His job was to stand in the corner of Hitler's bedroom and say "tick...tock...tick...tock" all through the night.
One night, after many months, the POW snapped and started whimpering "tick...tick...tick."
A furious Hitler roared "Vas iss diss? Vee haf vays of making you tock."
A monastery is in financial trouble, so it goes into the fish-and-chips business to raise money.
One night a customer knocks on its door. A monk answers. The customer asks, “Are you the fish friar?”
“No,” he replies. “I’m the chip monk.”
I used to work making bespoke tennis supplies from home, but I had to stop after the neighbours complained about the bloody racquet I was making.
> I went into the
> confessional box after many years of being away from the
> Catholic Church.
>
>
>
> Inside I found a fully equipped bar with Guinness on
> tap. On one wall, there was a row of decanters with
> fine Irish whiskey and Waterford crystal glasses. On
> the other wall was a dazzling array of the finest cigars and
> chocolates.
>
>
> When the priest
> came in, I said to him, "Father, forgive me, for
> it's been a very long time since I've been to
> confession, but I must first admit that the confessional box
> is much more inviting than it used to be."
>
> He replied, "You moron, you're on my
> side."
@panzade,
This is offensive on many levels so DO NOT READ if sick humour is not for you!
How do you circumcise a Trump supporter?
Kick his sister in the jaw.
@lmur,
That sounds a bit like a verse from
The Good Ship Venus.
The cabin boy was Kipper,
A dirty little nipper,
We stuffed his arse with broken glass
To circumcise the skipper.
http://www.shantynet.com/lyrics/good-ship-venus-sea-porn-be-warned-dirty-lyrics/
