209
   

Really bad jokes - don't be afraid to post yours here

 
 
Berty McJock
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:02 pm
@roger,
Quote:
Erm, he was also from The Bronx


well that explains it!!
they can't even say "coffee" without inserting a "w".

i wanna cwoffee Razz

a coffwee is something completely different, and medical advice should be sought.
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:11 pm
@Berty McJock,
Maybe, a speech therapeth.
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:15 pm
@cicerone imposter,
thereapissed surely?
0 Replies
 
Berty McJock
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:16 pm
@cicerone imposter,
personally i'd go and get my prostate checked if i started coffweeing.
spendius
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:21 pm
@Berty McJock,
What's a prostate?
Lustig Andrei
 
  1  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:23 pm
@Berty McJock,
Berty McJock wrote:
they tend to insert an "r" into consective words where the first ends, and the second begins with what sounds like a vowel...e.g. saw a = sawr a, thaw a = thawr a. even in liverpool "lots of" becomes "lorra".


I'm familiar with that accent. New England Yankees from the greater Boston area do much the same thing. They drop the 'r' in some words and then put it back into words where it doesn't rightly belong. Laughing
Berty McJock
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:27 pm
@spendius,
Quote:
What's a prostate?


about £20/hour if your not worried about personal hygiene.
Berty McJock
 
  2  
Reply Tue 26 Feb, 2013 06:34 pm
@Lustig Andrei,
Quote:
They drop the 'r' in some words and then put it back into words where it doesn't rightly belong.


aaahhh like the classic dropped "t", a very gutteral sound in scotland.....it almost takes more effort to drop it than to pronounce it. interestingly/ironically/both/neither in yorkshire, they keep the "t" and drop everything else e.g. goin down t' mine (where the " ' " denotes a dropped "o the" in "goin down to the mine")

i read about all this on' t'in'erne'.
0 Replies
 
Advocate
 
  3  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2013 12:51 pm
If you can’t find a lawyer who knows the law, find a lawyer who knows the judge.
Lustig Andrei
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2013 02:22 pm
@Advocate,
That's no joke; that's excellent advice.

There's another version of it: "It is good to know the law, but it's better to know the judge."
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2013 03:59 pm
@Lustig Andrei,
And it's even better to know the governor; he can pardon you!~
0 Replies
 
DrewDad
 
  4  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2013 04:21 pm
John Boehner.


That's the whole joke.
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Wed 27 Feb, 2013 04:34 pm
@DrewDad,
Unfortunately, what Boehner is doing is not a joke; he's dangerous the our country. Some 700,000 people are going to be losing their jobs. I hope none of them are conservatives. Mr. Green Drunk Drunk Drunk Drunk
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  3  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2013 05:39 am

https://sphotos-b.xx.fbcdn.net/hphotos-prn1/540962_10151423046587870_1245819031_n.jpg
0 Replies
 
Advocate
 
  4  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2013 01:37 pm

California vintners in the Napa Valley area,
which primarily produce Pinot Blanc, Pinot Noir, and Pinot
Grigio wines, have developed a new hybrid grape that acts as an anti-diuretic.
It is expected to reduce the number of trips older people have to make to the
bathroom during the night.

The new wine will be
marketed as



PINO MORE
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2013 02:06 pm
@Advocate,
Where can I buy that pino more?
Advocate
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2013 02:19 pm
@cicerone imposter,
cicerone imposter wrote:

Where can I buy that pino more?


I haven't found it yet.
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2013 02:35 pm
@Advocate,
Let me know as soon as you find it; I'm going to the bathroom 2-3x's every night, and cutting one trip would be great!
Mame
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2013 02:58 pm
@cicerone imposter,
Just wear a diaper!
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Thu 28 Feb, 2013 03:17 pm
@Mame,
That's a thought! Evil or Very Mad Twisted Evil
0 Replies
 
 

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