Living With A Narcisstic Personality Disordered Spouse

JLNobody you are a hoot! That last line was so funny! And I needed a laugh right now. I am so ticked! Still no water! I paid that bill at 8:00 this morning when the bank opened up just like I told that woman I would.

Now, I want to know where is my water? There is no one home at her house. I am trying to maintain my composure because perhaps they had some kind of emergency today. The husband is still not home and if I thought he had a fit last night because of this, he's going to be doubly mad tonight.

And, to top it all off, I don't think I want him to come home. Last night was the best sleep I have had in quite awhile. Just me and any danged cat (literally) that felt like climbing in the bed with me!

Boy, it felt good to get that out.

JLNobody is an egomaniacle bastard, every moment I have spend with him he consistently redirects the coversation about me to him.

I feel ya there, dys.

Okay, now I am really hacked off! It is 6:31 p.m. and I still have no water! My husband is not home yet and I don't even know if he is coming home.

I don't have a phone so I can't call these people. I am really considering going over there and raising some heck! I don't want to do that while I am angry because I don't want to do or say something I may not mean. But, this is friggin ridiculous!

There has got to be some reason she has not turned the water on. I mean, c'mon, nobody would do this just to be mean. I can't believe anyone would be that petty.

So, what the heck do I do? I am really getting mad! Does anyone know if I can somehow hook my phone up to the computer to make a call? I have DSL but that's different than a phone line so I don't know if that would work or not.

Momma- No phone?? You say that you live in the boonies, and you don't have a phone? What would happen if there were an emergency?

Yeah, Dys, but you always grab it back.

But, Mama, how's the spout on your beer keg?

If you've exchanged your real name with someone on A2K, you might ask them (via P.M.) to call the water lady (if you have her phone number) and communicate your concern (not your outrage).

Well, that's just kind of the way it is for right now Phoenix. Things have been tight since I lost my job and we lost the phone about two weeks ago. I still have the computer (I think they forgot about that part) so I can email and such so I'm not cut off completely.

I can always get to the police through the computer if I need to. I do have a friend a few miles down the road that if I type in 911 on an email she immediately calls the police, so that's handled.

But, if I don't get my water soon I'm afraid she's going to have to call the cops to save my neighbors!

JLNobody,

Great idea! Ok, I just have to wait for her to get home from work and I will ask her to make the call! Thanx. Man, why didn't I think of that?

I will send an email to my friend first, maybe she can call. Was really hoping husband would get home and we could just go over there and handle this ourselves. He's not going to be too thrilled dragging anyone else into this. You know, the embarrassment of it all.

Re: Living With A Narcisstic Personality Disordered Spouse
Here is what to do:

Remove the extra pressures from his life, this means selling off some of your houses and other assets and putting the proceeds into reducing debt and/or into investments that do not require much work (such as stocks and bonds).

Reduce the familial pressures such as found with children, aunts and uncles, mothers and fathers etc.

Take more holidays together and make them very simple and convenient.

A really big one here: spend time together without talking at all, if he wants to talk let him do so, but do not engage him more than the absolute minimum required, in fact you only have to pretend you are listening, just like my wife does with me.

Make everything at home as peaceful and tranquil and stress free as possible.

Do not engage him in any activities or conversations which you know are controversial or upsetting to him.

Unless you are already in strapping good shape. start an exercise regime, loose weight grow your hair longer and get some sexy new under-things.

Buy some romantic sexy how-to books and read them well.

If all of the above fails after two years, you will be all set up for a way better catch!

chumly, half of that is terrible advice!

Chumly,

You rock! Ok, we have sold the land and are moving to our other property soon. So, no more financial worries in about two weeks.

I don't need to lose weight and I have plenty of sexy underthings. Sex isn't the problem. Emotional bonding is. There is none! He does not have the capacity to empathize with anyone. I have come to accept that.

But I like the last sentence there! Let's see, how much time do I have left.............................?

And no answer on my email yet so still no water.

It's ok, littlek, I will only pay attention to the good half! :wink:

That's not much of an emergency system, then!

Well, I'm just grateful it's not a real emergency right now! I'm ok. I really am. I'm just mostly angry because they haven't turned on the water and he's not home and don't know if he is coming home.

I feel connected to the world at least with the computer. I was hoping someone could tell me there was a way to hook up my phone to the computer though.

I know one way.

https://www.sprintip.com/index.html

If the person knows you and knows you're not deaf it could be too confusing, and you're not supposed to use it if you're not deaf. But it's something.

Sozobe,

Bless you! I called. There is no answer there but I will keep trying. Thank you so much! You just connected me to the world again and now I don't have to worry about emergencies at all!

Bless you!

What do you mean, no answer?

There always is, period. Maybe wait longer.

Again, that's really only meant for deaf people's use, and non-deaf people using it can be cause for the whole service being cut, which would be majorly bad news for deaf people, so not to be used lightly.

Why?

It's a message relay service. It is set up to allow deaf people to call hearing people -- that's what it's for, that's how it gets its funding, and if it is shown that its not what funding is going for, the funding dries up.

How it works is that I (a deaf person) call Sprint relay via the computer, with the number I want to call -- I get a caller assistant (CA) who then dials the number and speaks for me. (I type, he/she speaks to the person I'm calling.) Then the person I'm calling speaks to the CA, and the CA types that to me.

I type, the person I'm calling speaks, and the CA is the go-between.

Vital service.

sozobe,

I meant no answer at the people's house. The service worked great! But the answering machine at the water people's house picked up and hung up.

Husband got home awhile ago. He was surprisingly not in a bad mood at all. We drove over to their house. No one was home. So, we went to my father-in-law's and he had some kind of a "key?" to turn the water on? Some tool or something. Anyway, we went back by the water people's house and they still aren't home.

Husband just turned the water on. He said he was tempted to do it last night but knew it wasn't the right thing to do. Now, he is a bit upset that we haven't had water for two days but he said maybe something did come up as an emergency for them. So, I will see if I can find out what happened.

Everyone, thanx so much for the help. You helped me to not get overly angry and sozobe you really helped with that number. I promise I will only use it in emergencies. You are such a dear lady.

Chumly,

Why do you rock or why am I only going to listen to half your advice (the good part)?

You rock because you put it right out there in all honesty. I will listen to the good advice. It doesn't matter if I don't even talk at all. If I don't, he will start a conversation about him all on his own. He can't help it. I know he can't. It just drives me nuts. Now, he thinks they didn't turn the water on today after the bill was paid just to take a potshot at him. I just didn't respond.