I'll just entertain myself

The zeebas in Pearls Before Swine seem quite Urbain and civilized.

Years back, when I was young, fresh out of the Navy, I undertook to hitchhike from Los Angeles to San Antonio. I caught a first ride, which soon left me walking a stretch of San Diego, looking for a vantage point where I could stick out my thumb again. My story is not about the journey, which I aced, by the way. It’s about an incident which occurred when I was walking the stretch already mentioned.

Along the way there was what inside the city would be termed a hole in the wall restaurant. It had a counter with stools just off the sidewalk, open to the fresh air. I plopped down on a stool and ordered coffee. The woman running it was near fifty. She looked very kindly and grateful to have some business. She smiled at me and sat nearby and I smiled as we exchanged some pleasantries. I smiled at her appreciatively as I stood up to leave. I always undertook such journeys in a state of moving in a dream world. There was in her face a crushed look but I was enough disconnected from normalcy as to think nothing of it could concern me and I walked. Far down the road and too far away to go back, it struck me that I had forgotten to pay the woman.

There I was, twenty-two years of age, and I am now seventy-nine, and the incident continually sears my conscience. I can still see her face, fifty-seven years ago, can still experience the big smile I lavished on her. And I regret the pain she suffered. For all I know, I might have been her sole customer the whole morning long. It’s not the fifty cents I stiffed her for. It’s an act that crushed her good feelings and self esteem. It possibly hurt her for days or longer. And even if she could laugh it off later, the possibility of her suffering, plus the fact that I will never know the end result, will always be with me.

And as I was writing these words, other such seemingly trivial incidents made me squirm. Why is it they prick my conscience still? There are major screw ups in my past that have a dulled impact compared to these. Maybe it’s because I could easily correct these minor incidents if they could be revisited. The major ones could never be undone.

Another facet to be considered: The major screw ups can goad you to learn and grow. From these hurtful oversights there is nothing to be learned. You are left with the irredeemable consequence.

You can ride a zorse.

One of my many faults Roger, 👌

Good. You could have taken that the wrong way.

Just learned that a person I know is about to die of Covid complications. They cured the virus, but his lungs were badly damaged. He has pneumonia.

Oh, that's very sad. I'm so sorry, edgar.

He's a man that lived quietly and loved his family. Just a few months younger than myself.

On a lighter note :
I borrowed the wife's lighter to make fires in the yard, then promptly lost it. She had another. During the day's burning I placed the lighter very carefully on a post. The next day I searched for the lighter but didn't find it. I told the wife my dilemma. She said, I have one more in my purse. I want it right back. As I approached the burn pile I discovered the lost lighter exactly where I left it. So I was able to give her lighter right back and still be able to burn. These little side issues are what keeps me from accomplishing things.

Burning is forever; therefore, you accomplished something, yes?

I had a huge pine cut down and ended with a great deal of debris after he hauled away the greatest chunks. Also have a series of piles in the far back from three dead pines. I do it more for the need of exercise than from giving a damn about it.

When you put it that way, I can see your accomplishments!😉

The more physical the labor the better I feel. Once doing maintenance I had to move three refrigerators up and down some stairs. I expected to be ready to drop by the end but strangely felt invigorated. I'm no giant and not a Charles Atlas, but that's the way it was.

I done a little physical exercise myself in the day. I've also got a few trees and a lot of limbs down that need moving into the woods. But, I can only hope next year I have more energy and a better body after a bad year physically this year.

I also know about moving refrigerators and other large items by myself. Done and don't want to do it again.

I find it difficult now lugging in 40 lbs of bird seed. Of course, the bag is 1/3 of my size (both height and weight), but still, back in the day I didn't have a problem. Ageing isn't for sissies, eh?

I hear you. Back operation last year doesn't help. I am just now finishing my third PT for it, I think this one is finally working. Unfortunately, I've had other surgeries in between - including a TAVR surgery. I still haven't fully gotten over it yet.

I lifted and brought into the house two 40 pound bags of salt and that put me.back in bed for about 3 days.

Getting old sucks!

The way I moved my last refrigerator was to lean it against my porch and then push it up from the ground. Then took a dolly and brought it in. No way I could lift it up the steps with a dolly like in the old days.

Last frig I moved by myself was from my house to my daughters house. I have a ramp on my porch and my trailer; my daughter has no porch. Frigs have those little wheels on the bottom, but they always sound like they are cutting the tile. I use the dolly as much as possible.

I am going to admit something here - I have never moved a fridge up any stairs. Never. Going. To. Happen. lol Even the bird seed now I ask my husband to haul in (he's a foot taller).

Now I have built a handicap ramp. No more picking it up. My wife said, "Why are you building a ramp?" Since then we both have found it useful.