Please stop with the porn

Also, you are right that there is decent percentage of those that hide porn. But it's not issue here, is it? We are talking about PORN, and not about possible lies connected with porn.

And does it really need to be 50-50 to get you to admit women use it too?!
Come on,Kyrian. Just answer this one question.Do women use it too?
(and it seems to me that you're the one who could use a "toy")

Am I obsessed about the porn thing? Obsessed is a pretty strong word. Interested, yes. Why? Because one of those divorces is happening to my best and most dearest friends..a woman who certainly did not deserve it.
.

[ And I will admit that there are cases where no amount of asking, talking or trust can keep these men from the porn. Maybe that is the case with your friend. I can't say because I don't know her or her husband.

I will say that the majority of these women are crying now because they couldn't get the stars our their eyes long enough to see the real man in front of them. Not the story book man. But the real human with real flaws. Big surprise for you who believe that love is all sunshine and roses!

If women were more open to the reason why men use it, I think that 99% of these "woe is me" cases would be averted. I think that men wouldn't get the deer in the headlight look any time the word porn was brought up.

And you said that this isn't stuff brought up in conversation but it damn well should be. It is apparently a big part of our society so why wouldn't people talk about it? I've talked about it with my husband and my friends. It wasn't a big deal.

You wonder allright,but not very intelligently. And BEFORE you get all huffy and insulted by that statement just remember-you havent posted 0ne reply to me w/o an insult or two attached!
Do I remember realationships with real people? Honey,deary,I'm 42 years old,married for 8 years,to my first girlfriend from over 25 years ago.And she doesnt give a damn how much porn I look at! I even show her some if its particularly funny or crazy! And (sit down for this,honey!) she laughs!
So,your friends are getting divorced,huh? Wow. And in each case it totaly porn abuse! Wow.What are the odds youd know so many people with the same uncommon cause?! Couldnt POSSIBLY be anything else could it? But then youve double checked the facts in each case,havent you? You've heard the mans side insde and out(no pun intended!). Wow.
And ,deary, you still havent admitted women use it. For some reason you cant actually SAY it. Oh,you'll say "I havent said they DONT!". But you just cant bring yourself to speak it,can you?
So,in closing, not only are your arguments(and I suspect thats all you really want out of this) invalid,but most importantly you are on the WRONG thread for those arguments.
And as far as wondering why women would"need" those toys, it suggests that women may be turning to that cause they arent getting "it" enough from their spouse. Correct! Works both ways,huh,Kyr?

And,everybody should click on Kyrians name to see where shes been and what shes saying. I'm no expert on Kyrian (thats her therapists job),but she ONLY visits porn threads (the I hate porn thread is probably her favorite) and ONLY blames men. Such an objective viewpoint she has,no?

So the daddys are told to leave by overreacting control freak mothers. I feel sorry for the kids now. Because they're probably being left with their mothers!!! I'm so glad you pointed that out,Kyr.

I could not possibly agree with you more. But, to be fair, Kristie, men need to get some stars out of their eyes, also. My friend's husband had only dallied with porn originally, but ...ah, what the hell...it's a long story...

At any rate, if men would bite the bullet and be honest about why they use it, look how much heartbreak could be avoided! My husband told me about his use, (unfortunately, not until after our marriage). I was devastated initially. Oh, I tried to act cool....yeah, buddy. But, it hurt like hell. Finally, I flat out asked him one day, if he just didn't want me anymore...if he wasn't satisfied with me...all the ?s I mentioned earlier. The good news was that he answered them, with patience, with love, with understanding. AND...he told me how no one could possibly replace me in his life and how much I meant to him, as a wife, a friend and a partner.
He was as concerned that I was going to leave him over it as I was that he would leave me. Funny, eh?

Yeah...I still cringe at the thought. Yeah, I still wonder from time to time if he's really with me in bed or who it is that's floating around his head. So, I don't look for his affection in the bedroom. I miss it, but I know I can never know what he's thinking and maybe that's best. But, I look for it outside of the bedroom and it's there.

You and I are fortunate but some women aren't and, it's to them that my heart goes out. I've learned a lot here. I still maintain that porn is cheating if you aren't honest with each other about it. And I still maintain that it can turn into a serious problem if left unchecked. So, if I sound aggressive, sorry. If I sound like I'm shouting the "sky is falling", I apologize.

You're no fun makemeshiver..... :wink:

And this isn't the thread for pounding the crap out of someone with a different opinion so ease up there carbuncle. sheesh.

Kristie wrote:

You're no fun makemeshiver..... :wink:

I'll bet she is...roowww....