If a woman doesn't want to be called a feminist, that is her choice. This doesn't mean that she want sto be treated like "seagull ****". It just means that she doesn't want this label slapped on to her. In the post you made above with Helen Mirren is the specific example you request of the attitude that women should be feminists merely because of their "reproductive bits".
There are lots of women who don't want to be feminists, and they don't want the feminist label.
Why can't you respect their choice?
(You are man giving your opinion that self-respecting women should be feminists. I hope you at least see the irony in this.)