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Is dating someone who's a different race okay?

 
 
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:28 pm
Ugh, a dating question. I've gotta ask though. Would you be okay with your kid dating someone who was a diff race?

Here's the story.

I was over at my friend Krystal's house today and we were talking about this guy she likes. His name is Tyler, he's one of my bestfriends and he's black. Krystal's white. Tan but white. Lol

So anyway, we were in Kry's room talking about Ty and Krystal told me that her mom didn't want her to date Ty. I was confused because her mom liked Ty. Krys and Ty have been friends for awhile and Krys' mom said that he was a good kid. So I asked her why and she told me that her mom said that she'd rather Krystal date someone like her. She said " why would you date Ty when there are other cute white guys that you could date." Ofcourse Krystal is still gonna date Ty and everything no matter what her mom says but I was still a little confused by it.

I mean, I just don't see the big deal. I'd date any guy. As long as they were taller and a little older than me. (I like tall guys and most of the guys I know are older because of school). Like, I know her mom isn't racist because she likes Ty but It sounds like a racist thing to say don't you think?

I don't see anything wrong with dating someone different. Different is good right? And Tyler's great. They'd be really cute together. Why does it matter if they're different?

But yeah, anyway, I wondered about that soo I just HAD to come here and talk about it with you guys. Lol

Would you date someone different? Would you let your kids?

I want you guys to be honest but please don't be mean. If your racist Id rather not hear what you have to say. Sorry but I don't wanna offend anybody and most of the stuff racists say about race are offensive. Let's play nice folks! Smile Wink
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Type: Discussion • Score: 36 • Views: 62,038 • Replies: 872

 
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:37 pm
@GracieGirl,
GracieGirl wrote:
If your racist Id rather not hear what you have to say.
Sorry but I don't wanna offend anybody and most of the stuff racists say about race are offensive. Let's play nice folks! Smile Wink
Your question DIRECTLY and explicitly concerns race.
Y bother to ask if u only want to hear one opinion on the issue???????





David
GracieGirl
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:43 pm
@OmSigDAVID,
Well, I just dont want anyone to say anything offense.
Okay. If your racists, fine. I don't like it, but whatever. Rolling Eyes Just try not to be offensive and shove your opinion down people's throats. Fair? Neutral

Butrflynet
 
  2  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:43 pm
@GracieGirl,
These two quotes from your story contradict each other. Do you understand why they do?

Quote:
So I asked her why and she told me that her mom said that she'd rather Krystal date someone like her. She said " why would you date Ty when there are other cute white guys that you could date."


Quote:
Like, I know her mom isn't racist because she likes Ty but It sounds like a racist thing to say don't you think?


Krystal's mom is implying that someone who is not white is second best and not good enough for her daughter.

She is indeed a racist.

Webster's Definition of RACISM
1
: a belief that race is the primary determinant of human traits and capacities and that racial differences produce an inherent superiority of a particular race
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:47 pm
@GracieGirl,
GracieGirl wrote:
Well, I just dont want anyone to say anything offense.
People can be offended by ANYTHING.
I have seen it too many times.





David
GracieGirl
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:49 pm
@Butrflynet,
I dont know. Maybe she is but she's such a nice lady. I don't know why she thinks that way and I guess that's why I'm asking here. She really likes Ty. Almost everyone Ty meets likes him actually. He's pretty awesome and she's always nice to him. I don't think she means to be racist. (if that makes sense). I don't know.
GracieGirl
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:53 pm
@OmSigDAVID,
Okay. Rolling Eyes But you have to know what I mean David. Racists people are mean. If your gonna INTENTIONALLY be mean, then you could just get lost. (not you specifically David. Just people with race issues) Smile
Butrflynet
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:55 pm
@GracieGirl,
Have you and Krystal talked about it? How does Krystal feel about what her mom had to say about her dating Ty?

Have you thought about encouraging Krystal to talk with her mom about it and maybe offer to be there with her if they'll allow you to be?
0 Replies
 
OmSigDAVID
 
  -1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:55 pm
@Butrflynet,
I just wanna say that anyone has a right to any opinion
about ANYTHING, including which race is better than which and how,
e.g., in racing, the blacks seem to run faster than whites.
We are not subject to politically correct thought control in America.

There is nothing rong with having an opinion.
I believe this thread implies that only ONE way of thinking is OK.
From THAT: I dissent.





David
Rockhead
 
  7  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:57 pm
@GracieGirl,
Gracie, racists are people just like you and me. and your friends Mom...

there are mean racists. and loud racists, and very nice little old lady racists (my gramma is one)

You are getting a taste of how deeply ingrained, and subtle that racism is.

it is sad, and something you want to be careful of as you explore how people think even when they nicely say otherwise...

Butrflynet
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 07:58 pm
@GracieGirl,
Was what Krystal's mom said about her daughter dating your friend Ty intentional? What do you think she meant by the comment?
George
 
  3  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:00 pm
@Rockhead,
Totally agree, Stone Dome.
George
 
  2  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:02 pm
@George,
Gracie, I not only dated someone of a different race, I married her.
gungasnake
 
  -2  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:08 pm
@GracieGirl,
There is less genetic variation in the entire human race than in a typical group of African monkeys of the same species and of what little differences there are, the main genetic divide in the world is East/West and not North/South, i.e. the white and black races are genetically closer to each other than either is to the yellow.

GracieGirl
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:12 pm
@Butrflynet,
Yea, me and Krystal talked about it and she said her mom was being a (b)witch.(Krystal never gets along with her mom though). She said she doesn't care what her mom says or thinks. She's still gonna date him. I think her mom just made her wanna date him more.

I don't know what you mean by if what she said was intentional. I know that Krys' mom isnt a mean lady and that she's always liked Ty. I don't know why she'd say that.
Rockhead
 
  3  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:14 pm
@GracieGirl,
gracie, it isn't a meanness, so much as a judgement...

0 Replies
 
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:15 pm
@GracieGirl,
GracieGirl wrote:
Okay. Rolling Eyes But you have to know what I mean David.

Racists people are mean.
R u SURE about that?? Have u sampled a lot of them? Did u give them a chance?
or r u just accepting politically correct principles??

I woud not blame any Jew who hated the Germans. (I knew some.)
I woud not blame anyone who lost loved ones at Pearl Harbor
or on the Bataan Death March for hating the Japs.
I don 't recommend anyone carrying hate around inside
because it is not healthy, but I 'd not shun someone for those opinions.


I remember my friend Neil (Irishman) telling me of his Irish friend
whom Neil described as being one of the sweetest, nicest, mildest guys in the world and
who passionately hated the English. He told Neil that if an Englishman ever saved his life, he coud not like him, even then,
but (according to my friend, Neil), he was very kind, polite, friendly and helpful to the people with whom he dealt.

Presumably, he 'd not want his child to date an Englishman.
I can understand that. ( I am of English descent. )





David
GracieGirl
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:20 pm
@OmSigDAVID,
I dont mean to make it seem like only one way of thinking is okay David, really. It's just that I know how people are sometimes. Even people here. I didn't want anyone to say mean hurtful things on this thread. I want to hear your opinions. That's why I asked the question. I like most people here, I think you're all smart and different and you know alot of stuff about alot of different things. That's why whenever I'm curious about something I come here. Smile

I wanna hear what everyone has to say David. Just nothing that could hurt someone else. You could say what you think without being hurtful or mean about it, or you could atleast try to, right? I don't think I'm being unfair.
0 Replies
 
GracieGirl
 
  1  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:25 pm
@Rockhead,
Hmm. I never thought about it like that. Yeah, my grandparents are kinda racist too but they don't think so. They're really judgmental and snotty and they call themselves "Christians". I hate them sometimes but then other times they're really nice and sweet. It kinda like that, huh? But, then again I don't know. Racists people have soo much hatred for no reason at all. How can someone like Krys mom be like that?
OmSigDAVID
 
  0  
Reply Sat 17 Sep, 2011 08:27 pm
@George,
George wrote:
Gracie, I not only dated someone of a different race, I married her.
When my friend, Donald, married a medical doctor from Red China,
I gave them a honeymoon in Las Vegas for a week in the Golden Nugget Hotel, as a wedding present.
(The bride had told me over dinner how the Reds had tortured her grandfather and how bleak her childhood had been.
I thawt the Las Vegas Strip lit up at nite 'd be a good contrast for her.)
The 3 of us also went to a gunnery range there and worked out with a lot of fully automatic weapons. It was fun.





David
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