36
   

WHAT IS THE HONORABLE RESPONSE?

 
 
DrewDad
 
  2  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:12 am
@Setanta,
Setanta wrote:
people who take this thread as an opportunity to attack me personally

So, pointing out to you your own behavior is an attack? This is what I've pointed out to you on another thread; your definition of "attack" is pretty broad.

I'm not attacking you, Set.

Edit: Feel free to ignore me as much as you wish, though.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  0  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:15 am
Oh, i always feel free to ignore you, and often do. I see you make snide comments about quite a few members here, and consider you an opportunist who likes to take cheap shots to make yourself look clever. Don't take that as a personal attack though, i'm just pointing out your own behavior.
JPB
 
  2  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:15 am
I don't recall who mentioned that you can take those comments as learning something about someone that you didn't previously know and adjust your thoughts about them accordingly. I think we do that all the time. In real life or in cyber relationships. We may think we know someone and know them well, but there are things about each of us that may surprise someone.

One difference between face-to-face interactions and internet responses though is the very real possibility that you've mis-interpreted their intent. Tone is very difficult to transmit correctly in writing and it's always possible that the thing you found offensive was taken in a different tone/context than the one intended.

Maybe you could say something along the lines of, "Did you really just mean to imply that you believe...?"

That could apply to those you respect as well as those you don't, of course.
Mame
 
  2  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:19 am
Is anyone getting anything constructive out of this mutual verbal bashing party other than FM who appears to find it amusing?
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:19 am
@Setanta,
If that's the way you see me, then that's the way you see me.

TTFN
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:22 am
@JPB,
JPB wrote:
That could apply to those you respect as well as those you don't, of course.


It could equally well apply to those who take offense at what i've written, also without having the guides to "tone" and intent which one can garner in face-to-face conversation.
0 Replies
 
Chumly
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:23 am
@JPB,
Me agree 100% that tone is very difficult to transmit correctly in writing. Especially certain kinds, some of which I quite like, such as tongue-in-cheek and anti-humor.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:23 am
@DrewDad,
My response exactly.
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:28 am
@Mame,
Mame wrote:
Is anyone getting anything constructive out of this mutual verbal bashing party other than FM who appears to find it amusing?


I did say at the outset that i intended to ignore people who just looked on this as an opportunity to indulge in bashing. I have done so from the outset with some people posting here. With others, such as Brown, i attempted a friendly exchange, but then began ignoring him when he obviously was just looking for the opportunity to take a cheap shot. As for FM, i wasn't even aware that he had posted in this thread, but you can be assured that i won't waste my time reading what he has posted.

Yes, i've gotten a lot of constructive posts from several members in this thread, and i am gratified that they have made the effort.
0 Replies
 
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:48 am
@Setanta,
Setanta wrote:
My response exactly.

It wasn't your response, actually. Your response was that I was attacking you.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:49 am
@Robert Gentel,
Here, i missed this (it's hard to step around all the turds which have been liberally littered in this thread, and i have tended to scroll rapidly). Yes, my experience of the failure of my brother's loyalty, after he expected it of me had a profound influence on my attitudes. Very often, in the situation you describe, if you object to the bullying, you will become the target yourself--and them you might be treated to the prospect of seeing the person defended slink away once you have become the target. By and large, though, i express personal loyalty by simply not criticizing my acquaintance in public, and supporting them if they are criticized, unless i consider that they have been outrageous. Hence, the problem i face which has lead me to start this tread.

Thank you for your comments about what you have said about me. I do not in fact hold grudges, but so long as someone has attacked and never makes a friendly overture thereafter, and especially when i attempt to be conciliatory and it is brushed aside, then i consider that they have no claim on me for civility or consideration. Some people here seemed to have decided that i was their enemy quite early on, and have never retreated from that position. I don't consider that they have any claim on me for decent treatment.
DrewDad
 
  4  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:53 am
@Setanta,
Setanta wrote:
By and large, though, i express personal loyalty by simply not criticizing my acquaintance in public, and supporting them if they are criticized, unless i consider that they have been outrageous.

I wouldn't be surprised if ehBeth feels exactly the same way...
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  -1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:56 am
Mind your own goddamned business clown--there, now you have an opportunity congratulate yourself on your low opinion of me. Does your wife enjoy you shitty-mouthed behavior?
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:59 am
By the way, that's another wonderful example of your penchant for jumping in to take the cheap shot--that remark was not addressed to you, it was not about you, and there was no reason for you to have commented on it, other than the petty joy you take in being snide to people.
0 Replies
 
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 09:59 am
@Setanta,
Well, since I'm the king of cheap shots, I have to live up to my reputation.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:04 am
Never worry about that.
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:07 am
@Setanta,
You might try putting down my remark to "supporting someone when they are criticized" rather than assuming it is an attack on you.

Why does everything have to be about you?
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  0  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:13 am
Everything doesn't have to be about me. When, however, you jump into a thread in which i am soliciting the advice of others about a problem i am having, and you start making foul comments about my relationship with someone whom you do not know and have never met, when you make comments about my behavior without acknowledging your own, when you take very opportunity to take cheap shots at me, you can hardly be surprised at such an assumption. I frankly would consider you full of **** if you claimed anything else were going on. Of course, i already think you are full of **** for a wide variety of reasons, of which you concerted effort to trash this thread is not the most blatant example.
DrewDad
 
  1  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:20 am
@Setanta,
Foul comments? Really? How are my comments "foul"? I gather you find them offensive, but ya'll are posting on a public forum after all. If I support ehBeth's comments, I fail to see how that makes me "foul".

(You also called "shitty-mouthed" earlier, which is a projection if I ever heard one.)

Stay classy, Set.
0 Replies
 
Setanta
 
  0  
Reply Mon 22 Feb, 2010 10:24 am
Oh yeah, classy like you? If ever there was a tag line from a fictional character with whom i think you should identify, that is a good one, although i think that anchorman was more intelligent than you.

It is foul for you to stick your nose into my relationship with Beth, and i'm not at all surprised that you don't seem to understand that. My experience of you is that you don't have the least concept of honor or decency. It may have escaped your attention, but honor is the subject of this thread.

Creeps like you have completely ruined this thread, and i suspect that people with decent, honest responses will not visit it any longer. But i was fortunate in that i got a lot of good responses from decent people here before the creeps showed up.
 

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