I read your new posts this morning, but was in such a rush I had no time to respond.
I'm so sorry you are having such a rough time of things. You have every good reason to feel really upset. Having been so reasonable up till now, I fully appreciate how hurt, let down & angry you feel.
It is as if he's turned into another person completely, isn't it? How could all those shared years come to this low point?
May I suggest you spend as little time as possible trying to figure out why
he's being so unfair, treating you so differently. I don't mean to be dismissive, but it happens all too often when ex-partners find themselves in new circumstances. Look at Mame's original posts here. Look at what I've posted here. It's really sad, but it certainly happens.
And may I give you the best bit of advice I can give you at this point? Don't, no matter how angry you might feel at his behaviour & his words, respond. Something you might innocently, inadvertently say in an email can be used against you in a court of law & you could find your position compromised. It might be something that seems pretty innocuous to you, but it might damage your case. Best not to risk putting yourself in that position at all. Responding when you're really upset is definitely not a good idea.
But I'm sure you've been advised about this by your lawyer. So consider this a bit of reinforcement from me.
No matter how crappy things might feel right now, Iz, this will pass. You will recover & you will feel much better & happier over time. It is just this frightful crap you have to deal with in the meantime. Sigh. I thought I'd never get over some of the post-relationship traumas I had to cope with, but I have. I live to tell the tale! And so will you, trust me.
Hang in there, Iz. This is the time to get as much support as you need from the good friends in your life. And to (try to, at least) switch off as much as you can from the poisonous, selfish stuff coming from him. It won't be easy by a long shot, I know, but you'll get there, you'll see.
Best of luck to you, Iz. Hang in there.