How can I deal with a boss that is unreasonable?

This is torture now.....he left the office to look at some land to purchase with an investor and hasn't returned yet. Its been 2 hours!!! I should of done it earlier! So I am still in agony wondering when he will ever return so I can get this weight off my chest. Until then I continue to post here hoping to make time go faster! All I know.....HE'S GONNA FREAK!!!

hellokittygirl777
I am sorry about your Grandfather. Your boss on the other hand, seems like a real jerk. If he freaks, so what? (as long as he isn't violent) and if you cry, so what? There is nothing wrong with crying imo.

Well.....I did it! I asked him to sit down so I could go over something with him. Of course, being the man he is, he didn't read the whole letter and started with....can you at least give me a two week notice??? I told him that I listed that in there.

He was calm and didn't say anything....then he started with no one would of put up with me getting phone calls at work about my grandfather ( it was just like 2 calls a day to let me know whats going on) I don't think that was many! OR I would call from my cell during the time that should be my lunch that I never get to take! Then he started with he only opened this office to accomodate me and he should of shut down in Novemeber...I put him in a bad situation. There is so much $$ spent into this company. He's never had anyone put him into such a terrible situation before. He passed up on people wanting to work here because I was here. He's been back and forth about it....one minute he wishes me well, the next minute he doesn't understand. Of course he has spoken to his wife yet (who will flip **** because then there won't be any $$ coming in unless he can start his other company quicker) Which ever company he neglects, he will lose on. Also, he will be in contact with his lawyer buddies and then I think the sh*t will start hitting the fan.

So I guess, better than I thought, but its still a shock factor for him right now. Only because he's lost on what to do is why he's not flipping out yet. Do you agree?

I don't think his lawyer buddies will be able to do much. You made no legal agreement about staying with him in the long run. Don't let them intimidate you.
Thats what I would expect from your boss. Intimidation, guilt, and claiming that he was good to you.

"No one else would have put up with your phone calls"
Thats bull:

-Linkat

You never get to take your lunch! I thought there was a law against that in PA; but it only applies to minors; sorry.

Opened office for you, he's invested so much, you put him in such a terrible situation, chose you over others, blah blah blah blah blah.
PLEASE! He's a user. He did it all for himself...perhaps out of fear of his wife. Don't mind him. What I mean is: Don't let his words get to you.
He has no ground. You will be victorious.

By the way: Giving him a two weeks notice despite his demeanor was quite a noble act in my opinion.

No one would put up with phone calls about your grandfather? Yeah right bone head - and most employees wouldn't put up with an a$$hole boss that didn't even have the decency to let you take time off to spend with grandfather.

Response to keeping the office open just for you - smile sweetly and say well what a win-win situation - now you can close the office like you want to!

I agree with Shewolf. All these positions he put himself in were his ideas and now he's trying to put a guilt trip on you. Typical abuser!

I'm glad you finally got things off your chest, so it's one less thing you have to think about.

He was so quick in mentioning everything he suposedly did for you, but it's a shame he forgot about everything you've done for him.

Walk and hold your head up high HK!

Cheers to you :-D

Linkat posted while I was writing and of course I agree completely with her as well.

Walk proud my friend

Good on ya, HK.

I'm sorry about your grandfather, but you know he'd be proud of you.

Good for you!

Now, whatever he says, you can take the high road. You don't have to let any of it bother you in the slightest, because you'll be gone before you know it.

Just smile and ignore him!

Lalalalalalala........

My answer for this is I don't know because I don't know him. I know thats no help to you, just wanted you to know I saw your question. I just don't have an answer

Here's how today is going.....

He calls me about 920 to ask me about a couple loans (even though he will be here in 5 minutes). The one he wanted to know most about was a slight blurr to me because all the information that was gathered happened the afternoon before my grandfather passed. So when he asked if it was at the lender, I said "I don't know, I don't think we have all we need" He then gets pissy and says "yeah it came in on Wednesday and I left it for you to do, so that happened before your mishap so I thought you would of remembered to get it out yesterday." I just didn't say a word. I am not sending the file out now either. He found someone to replace me already. I heard from an appraiser who use to work with that company that they were shut down due to fraud and no one there was in good standing.

So I guess thats my own personal little high note! I wont be the one to tell him. The appraiser said he will more than likely tell him. When I mentioned that I heard that the company had fraud....he started with, "what was I suppose to do, I wasn't given much time to find someone and this company has to make $$" She's coming in tomorrow and I am suppose to "show her the ropes". Apparently I heard that she knows them and knows her own way of getting them done. With someone's reputation like that, he might be best to shut it down himself before she brings down his name.

The great thing is, the appraiser is my best friend so he will be able to fill me in on all the juicy stuff!

My thought is.....if she knows what to do and it would take me literally 1 day to show her the files......he should just let me go. I never got my full bereavement time and I could take my holding week pay and have a week to myself. I think after this long, I deserve it.

HK,

Hmmm. When someone is talking down to me on the phone, I often find myself holding it away from my ear till it sounds like they're done condescending.

It must be comforting to know that his opinion no longer matters.

Linkat,
Were you calling me a bonehead or HK's boss?
HK's boss is a bonehead: I agree.
Myself a bonehead: I meant to say that the boss' quote was bull, and to point out why it was so with your quote. I apologize for my loose and misleading grammar. PS: My apologies for the extended post, but I couldn't get it out of my head.

Sorry - her boss - certainly didn't mean you!

Thought I would give you an update....

My soon to be former boss found a replacement for me and I am loving every minute of it. I was told that she knows this business inside and out...which would be good for him. She comes in, I find out that she can only process. Which means that she gets a list of items that the bank needs and she calls the customer to get them. A 12 year old can follow a list!

She doesn't know how to use the underwriting systems, can't figure out a rate for the life of her and to top it all off......she is not into the a$$ kissing that goes along with this job. She's a bar maid who has to deal with mouthy people all time and brings that attitude to this type of job. He won't go for that!

Also, he is big on appearances....he hasn't seen her nice collection of tattoos on her wrist and neck! This town is very odd about things like that. They won't deal with you if you look like that.

He jumped right in to find someone and got her name from someone that he's known that goes to the bar she works at and drinks most of his days away!

I am to train her how to originate a loan....that cannot be taught in a week and a half. Try about 6 months....the last company I worked for had a training program that lasted about that. Its the blind leading the blind!

I shouldn't be this way....but after all the agony, abuse, put downs and insults, I think I have the right to feel this way! :wink:

Oh and lastly, my soon to be former boss' sister came in (who Ive known forever) told the new girl, "my brother is cranky, a pain in the a$$, why do you think Marlena is leaving?? You wont put up with it for long and thankfully she's not anymore!"

Well, this is great. You couldn't have picked a better replacement yourself. Now, get in there and praise her to the hilt. She already knows how to process (whatever that is)? Subtly give her to understand that most people spend weeks getting to just this point. The rest of the job? Oh, she won't have any trouble picking it up as it comes along.

Heh, heh

I love it!

Can I break out the phrase "what goes around, comes around" yet?

Don't feel the least bit bad HK, ya hear me!

I think this is soooooooo funny

You certainly can bring out that phrase!!! I just said it last night to my husband! My family is loving all of this too because they know what I have gone through.

If I had false teeth, they would of fallen out after he said this to me yesterday......

Boss--so when do you start your job?
Me---The 11th, so my last day is the 8th and I only have the weekend before I start.
Boss--well i will need your work number
Me--Umm..I dont even know what it is and besides working for such a secure place as Capital One, I don't know how that would work. Why do you need the number?
Boss--I have a business to run and if there is something Mel needs help with or I need to know something, I will need to know immediately. I can just call your cell then, I have already given it to Mel.
Me--I never told you to give out my number and if its something you really can't find or need, I will call you after work.
Boss--How can you do this to me? You know that I relied on you this whole time and once you are gone, then you are really gone huh?


At that point, I said, Yes I am.

I am doing much more than any irritated employee would do....I am making sure that she understands every customer file and I am typing up a summary of what has been done and what needs to be done. Even though she should figure it out. I guess I am too nice!

He's lucky that I haven't just up and walked out to take time off after everything I have gone through. Who knows, more comments like that, I just might.

And to think that I am still going to "help out" (help out = tell him the complete way rather than those two figuring it out), well that may be the funniest thing I have heard! IF he were different to me, I certainly would be more helpful because this business is not easy to learn....but Montana got to say it before me on here. "What goes around, comes around!!"

Ok last thing.....today she was to come in at 10, well its 1030 and no show or phone call yet. I can't wait until he comes in to see this! I'm not a snitch and that was his pick....so he can come in to see if for himself that she's not here without a phone call too!

You're doing all the right things, HK.

How many more days?

Next Friday is my last day!!!! Feels like forever away. I kind of wish it were Wednesday of next week because we are suppose to have a counseling sessions at some point with the people from hospice after my grandfather passed. My uncle and I are the worst ones and having trouble coping. So I gotta see what we can do about that. I would hate to leave middle of the work day and then come in after something like that.

Of course we all know that he is not reasonable or understanding.....I will figure something out.