Threads don't digress anymore?
Things must have changed pretty significantly since I've been gone.
Sure they do, but there has been a lot of foopdedoo when a person asked for real help, probably not easily, and she got basically fk all.
And you haven't been gone long enough...
no, I mean...
you haven't been missing...
smiles.
You've still wafted...
She appears to have received a lot of help.
You seem to be trying to shame Montana and I from discussion of anything other than serious answers to Onyx's question. I wish someone had been around to protect my threads so stringently. Of course Montana nor I meant any discomfort toward Onyx. The topic---as happens in just about every thread here---brought up an interest for me that diverges from the main topic.
I suppose we're all still free to say what we choose. I may be wrong.
What's a foopdedoo?
I really couldn't resist, but I still care about Ony, so there.
Sure, and I can hope someone helps Onyx beyond sending her to Hawaii.
I didn't mean to even try to stifle you, heh. I'd go back and look at what I said but but but, it's 1:28 here. I don't care what I said... perhaps I will on the morrow.
A foopdedoo, we could do a thread, it's made up, but, say, a distraction.
I was mistaken to imagine us friendly.
Don't concern yourself with my trip through town.
Onyx--
I'm not an expert in sex, but over the years I've learned a few grim facts about the male ego.
Equal rights in the bedroom seem to lag behind equal rights in the rest of the world.
Many men feel that if they are fond of their partners, then all sexual activity is an Act of Love whether or not their partner is satisfied. Nursing babies don't ask, "Was it good for you?" Neither do most rutting men.
"...And the two shall be one flesh"? Sure--but by the rules of the stud.
Women read The Memoirs of Casanova and note his sensitive bedroom technique. Men admire his prowess and the way he racks up the number of conquests.
Men will pay top dollar to improve their golf swings. After all, a golf score is a public matter. These same men will resist any attempt by the Beloved to modify their sexual habits. After all the act feels right to them.
The theme song in far too many bedrooms is Ol' Blue Eyes exalting, "I Did It My Way".
Criticism is not welcome--if you reject the little head, you're labeling the man as insensitive, inconsiderate, and unmanly. After all, every man has Natural Technique--and he's happy.
When it came to equal rights in our bedroom, I would get up and leave when the scales were not balanced.
just like rubbing a puppies nose close to their poop, it only took a few times..
On the digression of threads:
It happens frequently, no matter what forum you're on. I saw it about to happen here earlier, and PMed the culprit about their comment's tendency to obliterate my thread. It was in jest - mostly. I know that Montana meant no harm in her jokes, i looooooove Montana, as lax as I've been in coming to a2k lately, so I know she didn't. Lash I don't think in all my 4 years of being at a2k I've had an encounter with, of any nature. But, everyone seems to like him, and he seems (or she? lol) seems good natured enough that I am fairly sure he (or she) didn't intend any ill will with the jokes either.
On the "sex without sound" issue
I never said I enjoyed sex without sound. What I said was I only make sounds, when the sex is good enough to warrant it. Quite frankly, if it's not even INSIDE me mostly what have I to moan and groan and/or scream about? Not a damn thing, consequently, I don't. Good sex = sex related sounds of enjoyment, Bad sex = no sounds, beyond the occassional "could you please do it harder/deeper/____"
As far as what he isn't doing right
I won't put that on the public board, but i think i might have mentioned a bit of it on the first page. lol. If anyone is really interested to know lol PM me, i'm an open book.
You may have done this too but-
what about you being on top where you have control over what is happening?
shewolfnm wrote:You may have done this too but-
what about you being on top where you have control over what is happening?
you're right my dear, i have done that. Maybe i'm being foolish? But i surely don't see the pleasure in having sex the same way, the same position for the rest of my life. Not to mention, it's the least favorite of all positions for me, and that's probably because I'm fairly submisive in nature (sexually speaking) so to consider the fact that I have to drive my own pleasure because of his lack of concern for it, is even more reason for the conversation we had last night.
I could see in the conversation we had last night (i think i posted about it on pg3) that what I was saying was in 1 ear and slowly out the other. At this point, I'm wondering if I'll be married in about 3 months. *insert sad laughter here*
Ohhh honey.. I hear you.
TRUST me..
I hear you.
I think there are probably millions of women who hear you, onyxelle, at least at one time or another? Who hasn't had a selfish partner? So, I don't know what to say to you, other than you're not alone, but that doesn't really help, so...
I had one once and lost all interest in sex and him rather quickly and it wasn't because the sex was so-so, it was because it was a sign of who he was (selfish). I don't want someone like that in my life. So, maybe what I'm saying is...
Either you take a stand on this or you forget about it. Really, what are your choices? You've done everything except counselling, so maybe that's an option. Thing is though, why should you bloody have to? I mean, it's such a simple thing and it should be a give and take situation, no?
Is he like this is other aspects of your relationship?
I have to run out to a craft fair now, but I'll be back this afternoon.
Don't know what to say, ony, except I'm sorry this is happening.
I love you too Ony and I hope hubby can grow to understand instead of taking offense.
Gotta love the references that men are selfish. Because women are never terrible in bed.
I think in this case, therapy is the logical progression.
From what I'm getting from Onyx, it seems that her husband knows exactly what pleasures her---he does it for a while--and then reverts to what pleasures him.
At least in his case, selfish seems like the right word.
Thanks for understanding btw, Onyx.
I wonder if he knows just how serious this issue is. Have you asked him why he refuses to give you what you've asked for? Could age and energy possibly be an issue in his ability to perform your specific requests? Men are LOATHE to admit this...
