Are there actually women who DON'T like giving oral sex?

That's what's so funny. Some of the biggest prudes will take out the dildos and put on the kitchen table for general discussion.

Talking or not has nothing to do with prudery or liberation. Some do, some don't.

Again....to clarify....

I don't believe I ever said anything about discussion particulars about a husband, boyfriend, or even a past relationship.

I'm not really sure why anyone thinks finding out if a friend likes or doesn't like oral sex would have to delve into the most intimate details of what exactly is going on in their lives.

Have I ever sat around saying something like "Well, then he did this, and then I did that, and he tried to get me to do this other thing, and I tried but it just didn't happen and so then we did this for 10 minutes but he didn't like that....."

uh....no, I haven't.

but, have I ever heard a friend, male or female make some type of comment, in passing, nothing obvious, no long discussions, that indicate they have a preference or non preference as to something.

Well, of course I have.

This isn't directly specifically at you mame, or any one else in particular, but I certainly don't see how realizing during a certain time of a friendship that a friend enjoys or doesn't enjoy something.

God, I've watched regular, on the TV movies with friends, and some scene happens that it makes me, or someone there say, basically....ewwww, or bleechh....that is a pretty good indicator the person doesn't care for that.

Or the opposite, you've never watched a movie, or seen/read something and said to someone else....Wow! In a way that would lead the other person to believe they think that would be a pretty nice thing to do?

God, no one said anything about any blatant, no hold barred confession.

And anyway, what if 2 friends DID have the type of relationship where they discuss this....no business of mine, and it certainly doesn't make them horrible people.

Calm down, Chai. Take a deep breath. Now.... open wide.

Incoming!

Me and my friends talk about sex loads, either in jokes, seriously etc etc... I am lesbian and love oral, so I suppose I only answer half the question. I have met women who love oral on men and women, but also some who are repulsed by it... some have even said in surveys I have read that they find it dirtyand would never consider it... each to their own!

Chai,
I'm the same way. No details, but just taking about what we enjoy and things of that nature. Never long conversations and we don't talk about what we do with our husbands or boyfriends.

Oh, god.... that felt good.

I can tell by the look on your face, Gus

On the question of women talking at any detailed length about what happens in their sexual encounters... I've no problem at all that we of a2k, and beyond, behave differently on this. (I forgot to mention before that I nodded along with Mame too, re privacy/consideration between partners). The no talk, all action comment was a sluggish effort at lightness of tone, not an accusation or defining set of how I think things should be for everyone, or even me, all the time.

I'm not working to convince others to have my own behavior on this.

Yeah, that's what I was getting at too. There seemed to be on one side the "Gasp! You talk about personal details? How gauche!" and on the other side "Gasp! You don't talk about personal details? How repressed!" Whereas I think either is fine.

I also think talking about relationship details is fine. I don't do it lightly -- there are maybe 3 good friends total who I trust enough to do so. But yeah, sometimes I need another perspective (in both directions, whether I'm too giddy about something or taking something too seriously), and sometimes the only way to get accurate advice is to provide some details. <shrug> Only with people I trust implicitly, not generally floating out there. I expect E.G. does the same with his good friends, and that's fine with me.

Do you give blowjobs or not, osso?

This shouldn't be that difficult.

None of your business, sweetie pie...

I've been searching for an article that I swear I read just three or four days ago, probably in the Guardian online. Well, maybe more a blog than an article. Anyway, this woman wrote a book about what women want re sex, anonymously, but by the publication date it was no longer anonymous, to her dismay, for a while, until she decided she liked all the honesty. She was quite firm about various distastes.

I thought you'd enjoy the article, but I can't find it...

Chai - That WAS funny - Montana was right! And you have a wicked sense of humour (not masculine at all - totally female - lol)

And Chai, my comments weren't directed at you.

Yes, I've been in conversations where someone might say they didn't like this or that, ie. oral sex (and yes, even specifics discussed at some points - eek), but generally no one will discuss things with their current guy. Somehow, if and when they do, the conversation is changed None of us want to know!

But I hear you on the generalities... lol - just girl talk.

Gus, our figment, asks personal questions blithely.

I think women just generally love to play with the penis. They like to watch it grow, find new ways to make it grow, smack it on their tongues, flick it, yank it, slap it, rub it, squeeze it, and otherwise manipulate it; sometimes it is with serious intent, but a lot of the time it's more like they're just giggling and playing with a favorite toy that never fails to amuse. Kind of like how men are with boobs.

As far as men go, sure, there are a lot of guys who are very excited about the female genitalia, and like to get in there and play around like it's some kind of new toy they've found, but for most guys, it's like, yeah, okay, I'll go down there and do my duty. Sure it's a turn-on to turn somebody on, but the female area is just so loaded with flaps and folds and hanging things and hidden things and inner and outer parts of things, and usually it's all covered in some kind of viscous fluid that, in and of itself is not disgusting or repulsive or anything, but it's definitely not something you want to gulp down like chocolate milk or spread on your toast in the morning. It's just not much like a toy down there. It's more like some kind of Rubik's cube or maze that takes focus and concentration to conquer. Unlike the penis, the vulva is a much more serious and delicate thing. It needs to be handled with care and precision, not jostled and played around with like a toy.

Right?

It is like a different life form, something not of this earth.

Like the rings of Uranus

I beg you pardon.