Quote:Gosh, that sounds perfect, Boomerang! I completely forgot you are a member of the clergy.
I don't like to flaunt it; as it is multitudes run up to me every day saying "Grant my wish! Please grant my wish! Pretty please!" and I'm like all "Look, doll, I'm just trying to pick up my dry cleaning so buzz off a bit, okay?"
But for you......
Send him up and I'll see what I can do.
Don't forget the check.
So, there was like this guy in my office, mmmkay? And he was scarfing down the tofu at lunch. And I was, like, gross! I mean, like, you can do that at home and stuff, but really??!?!? Who wants to see that in public, or at lunch? I am trying to eat my chicken salad sandwich and this guy is like, oh, man, it's just too gross to mention.
But then, he like, took me shoe shopping.
I'm afraid your marriage is irrepairably soyed by this affliction.
First of all, it was the Sixties, actually the part of the Sixties that included 1973, but I'm not offering any excuses. We were hippies then, but again, this isn't offered as any form of deflection from this essential, and shameful, fact:
we made tofu in the backyard.
I don't know how it happened, it was just something else to try and we were already making our own cottage cheese. I believe that cottage cheese making leads to tofu, I mean, I believe that now, I didn't then, there were no ads on TV to warn us.
So, when a friend of ours said she had a source of soybeans and would we like to try making tofu-- dare I say it?-- we lept at the chance. The actual process is so hypnotic: white white bubbles and burst of aromas and gasses and you stick the spoon in and stir and stir and stir. Then you rest, then you stick the spoon in and stir and stir and stir.
The waiting is the worst part. You want it to be hard and firm with just a little whitish creamy stuff on top, but, at first, none of us could wait and we cut into it and mixed it with blueberry jam and spread it on hot bread from the oven.
It was a crazy time. We tofued with garlic greens and tofued with hot peppers and peanuts. Then, we had no shame, we exposed our friends to tofu. We put tofu in the chilli. They didn't notice it wasn't beef. We were mad with delight.
===
Joe(yes, we gave it to the children, but it didn't take)Nation
cyphercat wrote:I mean, I'm just a layperson, so I'm just guessing.
You're a "lay person? ! ? ! ?"
I don't think your husbands soy addiction is the only problem in this marriage.
I love this thread because I just came from another (more conservative) forum that is talking about the article in a serious tone. This thread proves to me that there is some hope for the world. I would rather roast in Hell with a few good comics than lounge in Heaven with a bunch of loonies from the right. Long live soytire.
Green Witch wrote:I love this thread because I just came from another (more conservative) forum that is talking about the article in a serious tone. This thread proves to me that there is some hope for the world. I would rather roast in Hell with a few good comics than lounge in Heaven with a bunch of loonies from the right. Long live soytire.
Last night I had 2 chicken flavored soy cutlets for dinner.
This morning I sent squinney off to work a satisfied woman.
And I don't mean I bought her a new coat either. :wink:
So much for the queer soy theory.
OMG
I can't believe it.
I never thought that I would be one of the women affected by this awful epidemic.
I found soy milk hidden in the back of the fridge.
I don't know what to do.
Bi-Polar Bear wrote:Green Witch wrote:I love this thread because I just came from another (more conservative) forum that is talking about the article in a serious tone. This thread proves to me that there is some hope for the world. I would rather roast in Hell with a few good comics than lounge in Heaven with a bunch of loonies from the right. Long live soytire.
Last night I had 2 chicken flavored soy cutlets for dinner.
This morning I sent squinney off to work a satisfied woman.
And I don't mean I bought her a new coat either. :wink:
So much for the queer soy theory.
That proves nothing . . . obviously, you've only reached the bi-sexual stage . . . so far . . .
You should have been prepared for this to happen when you married an edamame's boy.
Bella Dea wrote:OMG
I can't believe it.
I never thought that I would be one of the women affected by this awful epidemic.
I found soy milk hidden in the back of the fridge.
I don't know what to do.
Don't worry, based on the theory it would be a cure for lesbianism.
Setanta wrote:Bi-Polar Bear wrote:Green Witch wrote:I love this thread because I just came from another (more conservative) forum that is talking about the article in a serious tone. This thread proves to me that there is some hope for the world. I would rather roast in Hell with a few good comics than lounge in Heaven with a bunch of loonies from the right. Long live soytire.
Last night I had 2 chicken flavored soy cutlets for dinner.
This morning I sent squinney off to work a satisfied woman.
And I don't mean I bought her a new coat either. :wink:
So much for the queer soy theory.
That proves nothing . . . obviously, you've only reached the bi-sexual stage . . . so far . . .
actually all I did was unload the dishwasher without being asked.....
Bi-Polar Bear wrote:actually all I did was unload the dishwasher without being asked.....
Whoops. You may be already past the bi-sexual stage.
I thought we were all aware of Bear's permasexual inclination.
You mean he has his pubics waved?
My roommate, whose name I cannot mention here, drinks almond milk by the gallons. Should I tell her she needs help?
I also noticed that Dyslexia is suspiciously absent from this thread. He used to bash soy and tofu publicly and now... this silence. Do you think he will come out of the closet?
I am about to fix lunch.... whole wheat pasta with red sauce containing mushrooms onions and peppers (and of course extra garlic.... it's vampire mating season in NC) NO SOY!!!!!!
Can I be part of the straight bear club now?
This serious?
Soybean makes man homonsexual?
Borat Sister wrote:This serious?
Soybean makes man homonsexual?
No, it is not serious. There has been a claim made by people who are politically conservative in the United States that the use of soy milk in baby formula makes male babies grow up to be homosexual. It is a silly, and a politically vicious claim.
The point of this thread is to employ satire, to make fun of people who believe such nonsense.
