The sexy French man who caught my eye

So he has a 5-speed in his pants. Fair warning, french hardware tends to fail when needed the most.

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ossobuco wrote:

I am a wrinkle head of frowns here.

You don't want his attention now, and duck your head all the time. Very coy. You see him doing all these elaborate sets of stances, and could be right. How old are you two?

I don't get how a guy who is single with a girlfriend, flirting with another woman, and maybe, gadzooks, switching, is all so horrible. That's what vows are about, you have them and you don't do that. Or you have lovers without vows of whatever kind. Or you're married and do do that, more complicated.

I tend to agree with you, that as a mature person, you finish one thing before leaping to another, generally speaking. And I'm all for fairness re the relationship. But what are you doing thinking these people are committed? That, in part, was a bit of what marriage vows were/are about.

People are more complicatedly divided than the paired and the not paired.

On the other hand, from your descriptions, the guy sounds like a peacock.
Really, Montana, best not to f/k peacocks from work. Also best to not to s/t where you work... that's an old truism for good reason. Not that I've always obeyed it. Still, there are good reasons for the truism.

Osso, you must be a mind reader, because this is exactly how I'm thinking.

I have been in the work relationship more than once and as much as I know better, I've become somewhat addicted to him and I don't think I'd be able to turn him away, if things don't happen to work out with his current squeeze.
I know the potential of me getting hurt by him is high, but it's been almost 9 years since I've been in a relationship out of fear for getting hurt and at this point, it would be worth it, just to have that feeling I miss ohhhhhhh soooooo much and who knows, we might just turn out to be a good match for eachother.

I feel that 9 years is a long time to live without love and I ache for it at this point.

I'm older and much wiser now, so I would surely take my sweet time before jumping in the sack with prince charming and if he couldn't wait, then he's not for me.

That is if things don't happen to work out with said girlfriend ;-)

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cjhsa wrote:

So he has a 5-speed in his pants. Fair warning, french hardware tends to fail when needed the most.

I'll keep that in mind Laughing

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Ah, I see we're not communicating. You summarized what I said as the opposite of what I meant....

Whatever. Go ahead, be yourself, see if I care (kidding).

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ossobuco wrote:

Ah, I see we're not communicating. You summarized what I said as the opposite of what I meant....

Whatever. Go ahead, be yourself, see if I care (kidding).

It wouldn't be the first time Laughing

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Let me try this again

ossobuco wrote:

I am a wrinkle head of frowns here.

You don't want his attention now, and duck your head all the time. Very coy. You see him doing all these elaborate sets of stances, and could be right. How old are you two?

I'm 42 and he's around 34

ossobuco wrote:

I don't get how a guy who is single with a girlfriend, flirting with another woman, and maybe, gadzooks, switching, is all so horrible.

I'm not sure how I feel about it

ossobuco wrote:

That's what vows are about, you have them and you don't do that. Or you have lovers without vows of whatever kind. Or you're married and do do that, more complicated.

I agree in a sense, but I wouldn't want my boyfriend lining up other women while he's in a relationship with me.
Flirting is one thing, but I see the wheels rolling in his head and I know what he's thinking.

ossobuco wrote:

I tend to agree with you, that as a mature person, you finish one thing before leaping to another, generally speaking. And I'm all for fairness re the relationship. But what are you doing thinking these people are committed? That, in part, was a bit of what marriage vows were/are about.

I don't know for sure if these two are committed to eachother, but if they are girlfriend/boyfriend, in my eyes, that's a commitment.

ossobuco wrote:

People are more complicatedly divided than the paired and the not paired.

On the other hand, from your descriptions, the guy sounds like a peacock.
Really, Montana, best not to f/k peacocks from work. Also best to not to s/t where you work... that's an old truism for good reason. Not that I've always obeyed it. Still, there are good reasons for the truism.

How did I do in my understanding you? Laughing

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I guess I lived in a bubble in time, relative to now. I would never think anyone had any claim without talk and agreement on commitment in terms of marriage or some other working things out.
Friends' boyfriends were off the possibility list (heh, usually). I never felt I couldn't date a second person myself, good grief.

I read here about various thirteen and fourteen year olds committed to their boyfriends (I know this is a close to home subject with you) and think, what? are they talking sixty years? That is all a romantic miasma to me.
You commit or you're free. And with some, depending on the understanding, they're still free to leave. Not flirting with a guy because you hear he goes out with someone, when he has been flirting with you, perplexes me.

Anyway, I am far more put off by fooling with a guy at work than by engaging someone with a girlfriend.

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Then I did understand you correctly, but I guess I didn't quite express myself well enough the first time.

See, I'm one of those people who truly don't see marriage as being more of a commitment than being with someone who you agree to be faithful too. Marriage to me is just a piece of paper and I don't think anything of it, but even though I never plan on getting married, I take my relationships as seriouly as someone who is married and even more than many.
I was never involved with two men at the same time, because one man is more than enough for me Laughing

I know I'm a hopeless romantic, but if I am, there must be more out there like me and I hope to meet one some day so I won't spend the rest of my life alone. It simply goes against my grain to settle for less.

I hear the french from France are very romantic people, so he just may be looking for someone romantic like me as well, instead of all the easy women there are out there these days.

I just gotta be me and I'd rather spend the rest of my life alone than with men who simply want to get their dick wet for awhile, until they get bored and move on.

I sometimes wish I felt differently, but I just can't change who I am.

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I don't want to change you, no way, just talking.
Lot of people who date don't express to each other that they intend to remain faithful.

Unless the moon turned purple when I wasn't paying attention.

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Thanks for not trying to change me Laughing

Dating is just something I did a few times, as I just ended up meeting these guys and "poof" we were together and I remember talking with all my boyfriends about our commitment to eachother.

What kinda boyfriends did you have? Laughing

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Many and varied... Laughing

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You go girl Laughing

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That was a while ago, but I remember it sort of fondly. Was married for +/- 20 years after that. Resting before I get my second wind...

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Resting before you get your second wind, osso? Lord help us!

On second thought, Lord help the men out there!

You are a VERY interesting woman, m'dear.

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ossobuco wrote:

That was a while ago, but I remember it sort of fondly. Was married for +/- 20 years after that. Resting before I get my second wind...

As long as you know that I've got dibs on frenchy ;-)

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Eva
Yes, she is quite interesting, eh Cool

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The man is driving me mad Confused

Will explain later.

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crazy lady

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Just my opinion, but I think you need to let another guy into the running.
Healthy competition never hurt anyone, and at the very least, you can be having some light fun dating.

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The sexy French man who caught my eye

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