18
   

Phobia of her

 
 
Lee1
 
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 07:56 am
Are all women that much into oral sex ? Giving & receiving ?

I’ve never participated in either, never was asked to perform it nor was it ever offered until recently, she found it odd that I’d never participated.

I guess my views are different than most, if I like her and see a future with her, I don’t want my private parts in her mouth...
I also don’t wanna put my mouth on her where I know others have been .

This is with a woman I’ve had a crush on for years and just recently started seeing, she was very promiscuous in her teens and early 20’s. Even was with a few friends of mine back then, I always wanted her myself, seems that I have a chance to have her now, I’m not so sure
 
blatham
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:02 am
@Lee1,
It will be a very unusual woman who will wish to pursue any long-term relationship with a fellow who holds that attitude. Do you have any sense of how you came to think this way about the reproductive parts of our bodies? And if I may ask, how old are you?

0 Replies
 
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:14 am
Read a lot in recent years about HPV and throat cancer being related to oral sex, and how women retain dna from every person they had unprotected sex with.

I’m 37.
blatham
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:18 am
@Lee1,
Quote:
HPV and throat cancer being related to oral sex
What sources? Who or what led you to seek them out?

Quote:
women retain dna from every person they had unprotected sex with.
And where is that data from? And why on earth would it matter?

0 Replies
 
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:27 am
https://health.clevelandclinic.org/throat-cancers-link-oral-sex-know/


Now your talking to a germaphobe anyhow, but, I especially don’t wanna get another mans dna on me .
blatham
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:33 am
@Lee1,
Quote:
According to Centers for Disease Control and Prevention data, there are 18,000 new cases of throat cancer diagnosed annually that are potentially related to HPV. About 10% of men and 4% of women have oral HPV, but only about 1% have the particular type associated with throat cancer: HPV 16.
Those odds are miniscule. You are hundreds or thousands of time more likely to end up in a serious auto accident every time you pull out of your driveway.

But I'm still curious as to why you were led to do such research? The germaphobe thing? Church? Something else?

If you don't want to get another man's dna on you, you had best cease shaking hands or touching any stair railing or armrest or cafeteria table or or or. So I don't get that.
0 Replies
 
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:37 am
I didn’t research it , I just happen to see an article on it.

When I say another’s dna, I meant biological material.
blatham
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:39 am
@Lee1,
Quote:
When I say another’s dna, I meant biological material.
Any handshake gives you that (or the others situations I noted). So do you actually mean sperm?
0 Replies
 
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:43 am
Yes, exactly.


I hate to leave a relationship that just started over something as uncommon as this, but, I also believe how I believe.

I feel as though I’d be a fool to Pursue it any farther knowing how she was at one point in her life.
blatham
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 08:51 am
@Lee1,
Thanks for the honesty.

We all have oddnesses. Sometimes they will result in positives for us and sometimes negatives. I understand that you believe what you believe (I guess we all do). I'll just end off by wishing you luck up the road but encourage you to understand that your notion here is not widely shared.
0 Replies
 
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 09:11 am
Thank you

I understand it’s not widely common, I’d think there’d be a few others though.
0 Replies
 
maxdancona
 
  0  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 09:11 am
@Lee1,
1. I don't believe that a man's dna can be found in a woman for more that a few days after sex. I would be interested in a link that this is the case.

2. Every person is different. I have met women who have zero interest in either giving or receiving oral sex. You should be able to find a partner who is supportive of this.

3. In my opinion both giving and recieving oral sex is well worth the risk. But that is just my opinion.
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 09:21 am
@maxdancona,
I don’t have a link that says it does , most I’ve read it’s 50/50 on the issue...

Just don’t see putting my mouth the same place some other idiot had his penis.
jespah
 
  3  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 11:40 am
@Lee1,
Then don't pursue this woman. In fact, you can probably write off just about any woman, even virgins (you can have had oral sex without also having experienced intercourse).

I hope you get some counseling. Your "concerns" make for impossible standards that no one will ever be able to meet.
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 11:45 am
@jespah,
I think that’s what’s wrong with our society today, everyone is okay with “ she’s slept with 15 guys “ no biggie , I’d like to be number 16.


Just seems like a good way to get a disease.
neptuneblue
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 11:54 am
@Lee1,
And how many sexual partners have YOU had?
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 11:59 am
@neptuneblue,
Three
neptuneblue
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 12:03 pm
@Lee1,
Were these long term commitments or marriage?
Lee1
 
  1  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 12:04 pm
@neptuneblue,
1 marriage of 7 years

Others LTR of 3 + years each
0 Replies
 
jespah
 
  3  
Fri 11 Oct, 2019 12:06 pm
@Lee1,
So?

I am being perfectly serious here.

Be honest with your sexual partners and expect/demand forthrightness from them. Consider the past to be ancient history. It tends to not matter, no lie.

Many STDs have cures, BTW, and just because someone had more partners than you find acceptable, it doesn't mean that they didn't take precautions.

Oh, and BTW, kissing a virgin who hasn't had a flu shot can be a dandy way to get a rather serious illness which kills people every single year --- influenza.

Or do the risks of getting a disease only matter if that disease is venereal in nature?
 

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