@Lee1,
So, let me understand this: You’ve kept a decent and loving woman from having a fulfilling COMPLETE relationship as she wants to have sex with her partner and be with someone who reciprocates.
Doesn’t she want to be married at some point? Won’t she want to have kids?
I’d call that selfish behavior except that she’s buying into it as she stays in it. Perhaps she has an idea that you’ll get your head straight at some point.