Confused, lost

Forums: Affair, Mistress
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Having an affair with a Married man. This has completely taken me aback as I have never ever thought I would get involved with a married man ever. I grew up in a complete family with loving parents and for me being in such a situation has make me mentally exhausted. I know nothing will came out of this but I really love him. Part of me wanting to let go and part of it not.

Some days I just feel lke telling his wife what will happened and he definitely won’t contact me for good so that I can really get him out of my life and move on completely. Do you think I should tell his wife about our affair? He seem to be in a loving relationship with his wife as they are always going on vacation together. I feel like an arse if I told his wife about us.

I am very confused and lost now. Please spare the harsh and unnecessary remarks. Thanks

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Type: Question • Score: 3 • Views: 1,503 • Replies: 11

@Decipher,

There is no need or reason to tell the wife. This is something he should get to doing

You are clearly not all that happy with the current situation, it might be best to just end it and move on to the next chapter of your life. Possibly even seek counseling to work through the emotions you are having.

I wish you the best.

1 Reply

@Sturgis,

Thanks for responding. I think I might need counselling as I kinda hate and love him now. Doubt any married man will confess to their wife that they cheated.

0 Replies

@Decipher,

Don't tell his wife. Like Sturgis said (and I agree), your affair partner is a big boy and he can do this himself.

Telling his wife is only going to further kick her when she's down.

1 Reply

@jespah,

Thanks jespah. Don’t understand why would he still wanna do this and hurt other girls when he’s happily married. I’m hurt now.

2 Replies

@Decipher,

Decipher wrote:

Don’t understand why would he still wanna do this

really?

let's see. more people to praise him, profess love for him, to have sex with him.

it's pretty much win win win for him

___

telling his wife doesn't hurt him, it hurts her and does you no good.

1 Reply

@Decipher,

Quote:

Don’t understand why would he still wanna do this and hurt other girls when he’s happily married.

I would turn your question around and ask you why you would want to do this and hurt another woman (his wife?)

Quote:

I’m hurt now.

And you brought it on yourself. So end the affair, put him on no contact and move on. You deserve better than someone's leftover affection.

Good luck.

0 Replies

@Decipher,

Decipher wrote:

so that I can really get him out of my life

this is 100% your responsibility

go no contact and get yourself into counselling sooner rather than later

0 Replies

@ehBeth,

But if u love someone, why would u wanna do this behind their back?

1 Reply

@Decipher,

Come on.

He can love his wife and still want to have sex with other people. That's pretty normal. Not everyone follows through with that desire and not everyone finds someone willing to be the extra sex person.

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Decipher wrote:

I have never ever thought I would get involved with a married man ever.

I never ever thought I would rob a bank until I found myself running out of the Savings and Loan with a bag of banknotes. I don't know how it happened. I tried explaining all this to the judge but he very cruelly put me in jail.

Confused, lost

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