175
   

What made you smile today?

 
 
chai2
 
  1  
Reply Wed 11 Apr, 2018 09:01 pm
@abc2018,
abc2018

I don't think your humor is much appreciated here.

If English is not your first language, part of it is that something is lost in the translation. Your "jokes" come across as very childish, immature, and frankly not at all funny.
I'm confident no one has even smiled at them.

0 Replies
 
roger
 
  1  
Reply Wed 11 Apr, 2018 09:41 pm
@glitterbag,
glitterbag wrote:

Baba is considered a tad goober......sort of like MeMaw .


Thanks. I've never heard 'goober' used that way.
0 Replies
 
Kolyo
 
  2  
Reply Wed 11 Apr, 2018 10:45 pm
@abc2018,
abc2018 wrote:

- "Monia, I want to talk to you about your relatives!"
- "Yeah?"
- "Monia, f...ck your mother! When are you gonna give me $ 200?"


Well, ho ho ho, ain't that an oldie but goodie....
If that don't get me every time....
HA HA HA.
Neocapitalistic realist humorsky.
0 Replies
 
Region Philbis
 
  1  
Reply Thu 12 Apr, 2018 03:57 am
@abc2018,

these make smile?

check with doctor -- could be facial tic...
0 Replies
 
izzythepush
 
  3  
Reply Thu 12 Apr, 2018 05:08 am
@glitterbag,
And people say the Russians have no sense of humour.
glitterbag
 
  2  
Reply Thu 12 Apr, 2018 10:59 pm
@izzythepush,
hahahahaha

0 Replies
 
chai2
 
  2  
Reply Thu 19 Apr, 2018 10:11 am
I can so relate.

0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Apr, 2018 10:49 am
cicerone imposter
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Apr, 2018 11:21 am
@ehBeth,
Went to Stan's donuts for donuts and coffee, but they were out of donuts, so I had the bar with coffee.
roger
 
  1  
Reply Thu 19 Apr, 2018 09:19 pm
@cicerone imposter,
Did you get arrested for only having coffee?
FOUND SOUL
 
  3  
Reply Thu 19 Apr, 2018 10:47 pm
@roger,
I am part of my wedding wish SA. Which in short donate to those that wish to get married due to a terminal illness.

I provided bouquets and the other day helped with reception decorations and showed the Bride how to do them.

She just sent me several photos of her re-creating them, stress free, thinking only of her wedding for once, whilst her future husband has very little time to live.

She then posted on my facebook page and was so excited it didn't just make me smile it made my heart sing.
0 Replies
 
Lash
 
  2  
Reply Fri 20 Apr, 2018 05:47 am
Last Saturday, when I arrived at my kid’s house, he told the grandbairn, “Grandma’s here,” at which point this two year old took the bite of food out of his mouth, put it back on his plate, and came screaming and running to me, shouting “Grandma, Grandma, Grandma!”

It does NOT get better than this. 🙆‍♀️🙅‍♀️🙋‍♀️🔥
Walter Hinteler
 
  3  
Reply Fri 20 Apr, 2018 10:02 am
@Lash,
A duck or a pair of ducks have been caught by the same speed camera flying at more than 20 kilometers per hour over the limit. The feathered felons are still at large.

A speed camera in western Switzerland has snapped a duck twice within a period of three days, Swiss police said on Friday.

The camera in Köniz, a municipality southwest of the city of Bern, picked up the first offense as a duck shot through the air 22 kilometers an hour (13.5 miles per hour) over the speed limit for vehicles.

"The duck was traveling in a low-altitude flight at 52 kilometers per hour in a 30 kilometer zone," local police said in a statement accompanying a picture of the airborne speed-fiend.

Three days later, the same camera snapped a duck flying at a similar speed.
But police said they could not determine whether it was a repeat-offender or whether they were dealing with a flock of felons.

Exceeding the speed limit by 21 kilometers per hour in a built-up area in Switzerland can result in an official police complaint, a fine and a minimum one-month driving/flying ban.
https://i.imgur.com/03xVLzd.jpg
Source: Gemeinde Köniz
0 Replies
 
ehBeth
 
  4  
Reply Mon 23 Apr, 2018 04:10 pm
watching video of the takedown of the guy who ran down pedestrians in North York (Toronto) earlier today

looks like the officer was already cool as all get-out or the recent police training really worked

so cool
so calm
no shots fired

the guy's yelling I've got a gun . the officer says, I don't care. Get down!

the officer gets him down without shooting

awful awful incident, 10 reported dead, at least 16 injured.
if I was still with a former employer, I'd have been doing my lunchtime walk along that road.

but the officer captured him without shooting him. I prefer that result. Better chance of finding on what the hell was going on.

So

a small smile in the middle of the absolute shitty news
chai2
 
  2  
Reply Mon 23 Apr, 2018 04:26 pm
@ehBeth,
I just watched a video (don't know if it's the same one).

The guy and the cop were having a standoff in the street, both with their guns drawn.
Behind them, 3 people just stroll by, casually looking back and them, and continuing to walk slowly. It wasn't until they were almost in a doorway/building that one of them increased his speed from a 2 mile an hour walk to a 3 mile an hour trot.

What the?
0 Replies
 
George
 
  2  
Reply Tue 24 Apr, 2018 08:55 am
@ehBeth,
"I don't care." That officer has ice water in his veins.
ehBeth
 
  3  
Reply Tue 24 Apr, 2018 09:10 am
@George,
Listened to an interview with the chief of police last night. A fundamental of their most recent training is containment with least possible harm.

Constable Lam really was amazing as were so many of the first responders and just regular people who ran to help the victims of the attack.

Hard to look at a lot of the photos - partly because the buildings are so familiar as we walked that stretch so very often.

but Constable Lam

http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/toronto/officer-praised-taking-van-attack-suspect-custody-peaceful-1.4632661

Quote:
"The officers here are taught to use as little force as possible in any given situation," Saunders said. "The officer did a fantastic job with respect to utilizing his ability of understanding the circumstance and the environment, and having a peaceful resolution at the end of the day."
0 Replies
 
Roberta
 
  4  
Reply Thu 26 Apr, 2018 05:32 pm
I had lunch today with members of my book group. Yes, I'm still the youngest member.

One of the women (91 years old) currently has two men vying for her affections. The last time I spoke with her there was just one.

What's her secret? How the hell should I know? It's a secret.

chai2
 
  1  
Reply Sat 28 Apr, 2018 10:01 pm
@Roberta,
Went for an evening stroll just now.

Approached this maybe 15 year old young man. I could see his Jeff Spicoli sneakers in the street light. As I got up to him a nice pickup truck pulled up next to him and lowered the passenger window.

Kid says "You the Uber dude?"

Yeah...

Off they went.

https://media.giphy.com/media/1xtSBR0oIbcRi/giphy.gif
farmerman
 
  1  
Reply Sun 29 Apr, 2018 05:45 am
@chai2,
Im so fuckin far out in the sticks I have no idea who Jeff Spicoli even is, and why did this kid grab his sneakers?? CANT WE JUST GET ALONG??
 

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