21
   

Being intelligent is hard. Life is frustrating. I'm worried.

 
 
aperson
 
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 06:21 am
You'd think it'd be good. In a way it kinda sucks. I sometimes get into quiet, deep, reflective moods and I feel like discussing life and death and reality and truth and meaning and reason and human nature and the future, but I have no one to talk to that I know first hand. Some of my peers are more intelligent than me in maths and in terms of IQ, but none of them think. I mean, they do think of course, about video games and exams and girls, but they don't actually think deeply about anything. My parents only care about shares and work and what horrible **** is going down in the world lately. Their minds are closed to any big question, just like everyone else.

Last year I owned my school exams, but only due to lots and lots of study in the preceding 3 months or so. I am doing a Philosophy course at university for a challenge, though the it is more geared towards logic than typical Philosophy. I get bored in lectures. I got A+ in the first assignment, one of the only two in the class. And seriously, I say this without any arrogance: I feel like I am living in a world full of morons. Even the lecturer is stupid. It frustrates the hell out of me.

I am losing enthusiasm for school, and I'm worried that I'll end up getting lazy and flunking my exams. I still have almost two years to go. It's worrying me, and I don't feel any real incentive to work hard any more. Whilst being generally popular and well-liked, I find I have an inability to connect with people. There's no-one who I can talk to about everything that goes on in my screwed up mind. I have never had a best friend for longer than two years. As soon as I get close to someone, I start to lose interest in them, and they in me. I am beginning to have a slightly existentially nihilistic view on life. Nothing really matters. Real morals don't exist. Life is pointless.

I don't even know what I'm asking from you, a2k. Just talk to me. Please.
 
DrewDad
 
  3  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 06:54 am
@aperson,
aperson wrote:
I am losing enthusiasm for school, and I'm worried that I'll end up getting lazy and flunking my exams. I still have almost two years to go. It's worrying me, and I don't feel any real incentive to work hard any more. Whilst being generally popular and well-liked, I find I have an inability to connect with people. There's no-one who I can talk to about everything that goes on in my screwed up mind. I have never had a best friend for longer than two years. As soon as I get close to someone, I start to lose interest in them, and they in me. I am beginning to have a slightly existentially nihilistic view on life. Nothing really matters. Real morals don't exist. Life is pointless.

That sounds like depression to me. That's how I felt my third year in; I ended up dropping out. Later on I got it worked out, but I wish I'd known how to handle it then.

Go look up your campus counseling office. You're right about needing to talk.
Joeblow
 
  0  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 07:06 am
'morning aperson.

Drewdad's post made sense to me.

I'll follow this thread.

I'm paying attention.



0 Replies
 
sullyfish6
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 07:35 am
So you seem to be gifted in ONE area.

Great!

How does it translate into a happy , well rounded life?

You can join clubs of like minded people and have all these cool discussions, but at the end of the day you still have to live in a real world.

Try to put aside this "exaggerated" focus and develop some other sides of your intelligence. In the Arts or physical activities, for example.

I am concerned that you are going to drown in your own self-intelligence
0 Replies
 
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 07:48 am
All intellect is a dead end life......this is a good time for you to learn this lesson. What you need to do is find stuff that you love, people that you love, laugh more, see life as a game and care enough about the game to want to win.

80%+ of the people that you will meet are asleep, dull, but not everyone is.....seek out those who are passionate, alert, awake, alive, still growing.
0 Replies
 
rosborne979
 
  2  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 07:57 am
@aperson,
Hi Aperson,

Physical exercise often does wonders to counter depression. In addition, it can allow you to set a goal and challenge yourself.

I don't know much about your specific situation, but you might consider setting a goal for yourself with some type of physical expression. For example, you might take up jogging with a goal of running 3 miles a day, or 10 miles a week or something. Or maybe do some weight lifting (bench press your own weight). I found weight lifting to be extremely refreshing mentally. I always felt good after a good workout. Or you could pick up a sport, tennis or basketball or something. Just make sure your initial goals are attainable. Then if you hit that goal, just set another one and keep going.

Good luck,
0 Replies
 
OmSigDAVID
 
  2  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 08:05 am
@aperson,
aperson wrote:

You'd think it'd be good. In a way it kinda sucks. I sometimes get into quiet, deep, reflective moods and I feel like discussing life and death and reality and truth and meaning and reason and human nature and the future, but I have no one to talk to that I know first hand. Some of my peers are more intelligent than me in maths and in terms of IQ, but none of them think. I mean, they do think of course, about video games and exams and girls, but they don't actually think deeply about anything. My parents only care about shares and work and what horrible **** is going down in the world lately. Their minds are closed to any big question, just like everyone else.

Last year I owned my school exams, but only due to lots and lots of study in the preceding 3 months or so. I am doing a Philosophy course at university for a challenge, though the it is more geared towards logic than typical Philosophy. I get bored in lectures. I got A+ in the first assignment, one of the only two in the class. And seriously, I say this without any arrogance: I feel like I am living in a world full of morons. Even the lecturer is stupid. It frustrates the hell out of me.

I am losing enthusiasm for school, and I'm worried that I'll end up getting lazy and flunking my exams. I still have almost two years to go. It's worrying me, and I don't feel any real incentive to work hard any more. Whilst being generally popular and well-liked, I find I have an inability to connect with people. There's no-one who I can talk to about everything that goes on in my screwed up mind. I have never had a best friend for longer than two years. As soon as I get close to someone, I start to lose interest in them, and they in me. I am beginning to have a slightly existentially nihilistic view on life. Nothing really matters. Real morals don't exist. Life is pointless.

I don't even know what I'm asking from you, a2k. Just talk to me. Please.

The most important thing in life is having fun, including enjoying beauty.
As Richard Bach put it: "we are the otters of the universe."
Each of us owes it to himself to create as much happiness n beauty as possible, on a long-term basis.
This very likely requires financial resources to support comfort, fun and beauty on a long-term basis.
Hence, unless u already have them, this requires u to acquire those resources.
Failing to plan is planning to fail.





David
hawkeye10
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 08:20 am
or to put it another way, what you have is a spiritual problem, and are surprised that you can have a spiritual problem given your gifted intellect. Intellect and spirit are only loosely connected. I am saying (as are others) that you need to work to keep in good spirits. There are specific things that you can do towards this goal.
0 Replies
 
farmerman
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 08:21 am
@OmSigDAVID,
Sounds like youre a potential student for a career in APPLIED SCIENCE. First off, get a gang of similar smartasses and go and clean out some casinos .
0 Replies
 
Mame
 
  3  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 08:38 am
Hi aperson. You've gotten some good advice here. All I want to add is don't dwell on the negative and try and find some positives. You're appreciated here and you know there are some good minds here to challenge you. Hang in there, buddy.
0 Replies
 
aidan
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 10:40 am
@aperson,
The first thing that comes to my mind, is that maybe you're in the wrong course of study. If you're losing enthusiasm and are bored, or think that it's not important and won't make a contribution in terms of life in general, maybe you should do something else that is more practical which would enable you to observe a product or result and see something achieved or accomplished apart and aside from an A* on a paper - because really - as you said, if it came so easily and it's no longer meaningful to you, why do it anymore?
I was talking to a guy today who was initially an engineer, but even after graduating and working in the field, decided it was worth his time and effort to make a change, and now he's taking a course in surveyance and he's done water surveying and now he's doing surveying from the air (learning in a practical course right now). He's going to be surveying a small island 400 miles off the coast of Madagascar in a couple of weeks from the air.
That sounds pretty interesting to me. And I would never have known that was a course of study. I guess what I'm saying is that there are so many options open to you at this point- don't quit because you don't like what you first chose - choose something else if necessary.

I think the advice about physical exertion is a good one. And maybe you could generalize that to work. Maybe you should do some physical work that would result in a finished product. I know when I was in school, in the summers I always worked on a farm or in a garden. I loved being outside, I loved the sense of accomplishment readily visible by the weeded garden or the baskets or harvested vegetables, and it was a good and needed departure from my usual activities of reading and writing papers and thinking.

I'd also advise you to find something fun to do as David advised. And one of the most fun and rewarding ways I've found to spend my time is with children or people who are less intellectually able than I am- because I just find them so refreshing and funny- and again, so appreciative of any time or effort spent on their behalf. And you can learn so much from their views and perceptions on life that tend to be so different from your own or the more 'normally' or 'highly' intelligent people you usually spend time with.

In terms of connecting - I'll always remember what someone said to me when I was about your age (I'm guessing) and I was complaining about a friend to him, he said - 'You can't control what kind of friend anyone is to you, you can only control what kind of friend you are to them'.
That made me realize - maybe I wasn't being the best friend I could be. And since then, I've always just made a point to be the best friend to anyone I wanted as a friend that I could possibly be- without always worrying about what they were giving me.
And my connections since then have been close and tight and wonderful- with ALL kinds of people.
It's so much more interesting to have some connections with people who experience things differently than you do, than to always be with people who process the world and experience it just like you do- in other words, other smart people.
Sometimes I think intelligence, especially as some sort of goal and as any sort of be -all and end- all, is overrated.
fresco
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 10:59 am
@aperson,
Quote:
You'd think it'd be good. In a way it kinda sucks. I sometimes get into quiet, deep, reflective moods and I feel like discussing life and death and reality and truth and meaning and reason and human nature and the future, but I have no one to talk to that I know first hand. Some of my peers are more intelligent than me in maths and in terms of IQ, but none of them think. I mean, they do think of course, about video games and exams and girls, but they don't actually think deeply about anything. My parents only care about shares and work and what horrible **** is going down in the world lately. Their minds are closed to any big question, just like everyone else.

Last year I owned my school exams, but only due to lots and lots of study in the preceding 3 months or so. I am doing a Philosophy course at university for a challenge, though the it is more geared towards logic than typical Philosophy. I get bored in lectures. I got A+ in the first assignment, one of the only two in the class. And seriously, I say this without any arrogance: I feel like I am living in a world full of morons. Even the lecturer is stupid. It frustrates the hell out of me.

I am losing enthusiasm for school, and I'm worried that I'll end up getting lazy and flunking my exams. I still have almost two years to go. It's worrying me, and I don't feel any real incentive to work hard any more. Whilst being generally popular and well-liked, I find I have an inability to connect with people. There's no-one who I can talk to about everything that goes on in my screwed up mind. I have never had a best friend for longer than two years. As soon as I get close to someone, I start to lose interest in them, and they in me. I am beginning to have a slightly existentially nihilistic view on life. Nothing really matters. Real morals don't exist. Life is pointless.

I don't even know what I'm asking from you, a2k. Just talk to me. Please.


One philosophical position is that I is an illusion evoked by situation. Try reading the above putting it in place of I and that will give the same perspective on it as it gives to other its. Interesting things might follow !
0 Replies
 
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 11:24 am
@aidan,
aidan wrote:
Quote:

I think the advice about physical exertion is a good one.
And maybe you could generalize that to work. Maybe you should
do some physical work that would result in a finished product.
I know when I was in school, in the summers I always worked on a farm
or in a garden. I loved being outside, I loved the sense of accomplishment
readily visible by the weeded garden or the baskets or harvested vegetables,
and it was a good and needed departure from my usual activities
of reading and writing papers and thinking.

I enjoyed relaxing with friends.

Quote:
I'd also advise you to find something fun to do as David advised.
And one of the most fun and rewarding ways I've found to spend
my time is with children or people who are less intellectually able
than I am- because I just find them so refreshing and funny-
and again, so appreciative of any time or effort spent on their behalf.
And you can learn so much from their views and perceptions
on life that tend to be so different from your own or the
more 'normally' or 'highly' intelligent people you usually spend time with.

Where did u get them ?



Quote:
In terms of connecting - I'll always remember what someone said to me
when I was about your age (I'm guessing) and I was complaining
about a friend to him, he said -
'You can't control what kind of friend anyone is to you,
you can only control what kind of friend you are to them'.
That made me realize - maybe I wasn't being the best friend I could be.
And since then, I've always just made a point to be the best friend
to anyone I wanted as a friend that I could possibly be-
without always worrying about what they were giving me
.
And my connections since then have been close and tight and wonderful- with ALL kinds of people.
It's so much more interesting to have some connections with people who experience things differently than you do,
than to always be with people who process the world and experience it just like you do- in other words, other smart people.
Sometimes I think intelligence, especially as some sort of goal and as any sort of be -all and end- all, is overrated.

" Give a little more than you 're asking for, and your love will turn the key . . . . OOOOOoooooooo "

When r u returning to New York, Rebecca ?





David
LostBlackBook
 
  2  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 11:35 am
@aperson,
Globally, the average IQ has diminished ever so slightly in the past 20 years. This could very well be a trend. I'll let you think about the longterm end result on your own.

As for the coping strategies you seem to be lacking at the moment, I can suggest one thing that may help. Think of overall goals and what you can accomplish. If the lack of altruism in friends and family causes them to be in error in your mind, set goals for yourself educationally and career-wise that will allow you to do better things for others than they. Keep your altruistic goals in mind when you are feeling uninspired or lacking in motivation to accomplish good things. This should help.
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 11:36 am
@aperson,
aperson wrote:

You'd think it'd be good. In a way it kinda sucks. I sometimes get into quiet, deep, reflective moods and I feel like discussing life and death and reality and truth and meaning and reason and human nature and the future, but I have no one to talk to that I know first hand. Some of my peers are more intelligent than me in maths and in terms of IQ, but none of them think. I mean, they do think of course, about video games and exams and girls, but they don't actually think deeply about anything. My parents only care about shares and work and what horrible **** is going down in the world lately. Their minds are closed to any big question, just like everyone else.

Last year I owned my school exams, but only due to lots and lots of study in the preceding 3 months or so. I am doing a Philosophy course at university for a challenge, though the it is more geared towards logic than typical Philosophy. I get bored in lectures. I got A+ in the first assignment, one of the only two in the class. And seriously, I say this without any arrogance: I feel like I am living in a world full of morons. Even the lecturer is stupid. It frustrates the hell out of me.

I am losing enthusiasm for school, and I'm worried that I'll end up getting lazy and flunking my exams. I still have almost two years to go. It's worrying me, and I don't feel any real incentive to work hard any more. Whilst being generally popular and well-liked, I find I have an inability to connect with people. There's no-one who I can talk to about everything that goes on in my screwed up mind. I have never had a best friend for longer than two years. As soon as I get close to someone, I start to lose interest in them, and they in me. I am beginning to have a slightly existentially nihilistic view on life. Nothing really matters. Real morals don't exist. Life is pointless.

I don't even know what I'm asking from you, a2k. Just talk to me. Please.

If real morals existed, person, what 'd thay be ?
In other words: will u define "real morals" ?





David
0 Replies
 
OmSigDAVID
 
  1  
Reply Fri 8 May, 2009 11:43 am
@LostBlackBook,
LostBlackBook wrote:

Globally, the average IQ has diminished ever so slightly in the past 20 years. This could very well be a trend.
I'll let you think about the longterm end result on your own.

As for the coping strategies you seem to be lacking at the moment, I can suggest one thing that may help. Think of overall goals and what you can accomplish. If the lack of altruism in friends and family causes them to be in error in your mind, set goals for yourself educationally and career-wise that will allow you to do better things for others than they. Keep your altruistic goals in mind when you are feeling uninspired or lacking in motivation to accomplish good things. This should help.


If he wishes to be an altruist,
he can commit acts of wanton and promiscuous altruism, as he walks thru the world
(if such be his choice).





David
0 Replies
 
aperson
 
  1  
Reply Sat 9 May, 2009 12:14 am
Thanks everyone. I never thought I'd be depressed. I don't even know that I am. Maybe I'm just having a bad week. I don't know if I should see the school counsellor... there are other kids with way worse problems. I don't really have any right to be depressed... that sounds like denial, I know, but I mean there are kids with abusive parents and alcohol addictions. I'm a high acheiver with good parents and a healthy lifestyle. There's no reason I should be depressed.

Maybe you are right though when you say that I'm too focused on acedemics. I've kind of always had the view that only intellectual work matters. But maybe I should try to pursue other goals like physical activity. Maybe I gardening or something like that would be good for me... though it is Winter at the moment. I'll try weight lifting or something maybe.

And I think my maybe I've forgotten about just making others happy. Maybe I should try harder to do things for my friends and probably also family.

I think I've just gotten so tied up in mental work that I've forgotten what life is really about.

And Mame, you are right. There are some good minds here to challenge me. One such mind is fresco. I never understand what he is saying Wink

Thank you everyone for your help. It is really appreciated.
hawkeye10
 
  0  
Reply Sat 9 May, 2009 12:31 am
@aperson,
Quote:
Thanks everyone. I never thought I'd be depressed. I don't even know that I am. Maybe I'm just having a bad week. I don't know if I should see the school counsellor... there are other kids with way worse problems. I don't really have any right to be depressed... that sounds like denial, I know, but I mean there are kids with abusive parents and alcohol addictions. I'm a high acheiver with good parents and a healthy lifestyle. There's no reason I should be depressed.


you are not yet another ******* professional victim, don't lower yourself to their shitty standards. Bad stuff happens, to almost everybody, we non victims adjust and move on.
0 Replies
 
fresco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 9 May, 2009 12:39 am
@aperson,
aperson,

It's simple really. All you need to do is notice that the "observer" that just replied in a positive manner is "different" to the "self" which posted originally. The observer sees that first "self" as an "object in context" ...and there may be other levels which objectify the current observer! Wink
fresco
 
  1  
Reply Sat 9 May, 2009 12:49 am
@fresco,
Just to clarify,

The observer=aperson2 .......Its object = aperson1
0 Replies
 
 

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