husband wants threesome

It is funny, many prostitutes will do anything with a client but kiss - it's too personal and intimate!



They make a new doll out foam that is almost life like. Costs a bundle also!

Hey, I have a practical idea for a threesome. You, hubby, and your divorce attorney. Kill two birds with one stone.

Seriously though, I think that the whole idea is problematic, for many reasons!

How much did it set you back, Bill? If you're having financial problems because of overextending your budget don't hesitate to ask me for a loan.

Actually, she told me she was married to you and you kept trying to blow her up (said you just didn't understand modern things ), so she just left. She didn't charge because she got half of everything. Said you promised to fix the leaky roof

I gotta say as a husband i don't ever imaging myself being with two other women at the same time.

I couldn't concentrate LOL....

but seriously i just think there are a lot of potential problems and you could loose friends over it.

I know 2 people who tried this and they both were kicking themselves afterwords. One of them got divorced very soon after the event & second one stayed in the marriage for their child's sake but eventually they got divorced as well. I don't know... I wouldn't do that but if you think this is a right thing for you, go ahead. Just think of all the consequences.

I guess I just don't understand what the lure is for a happily married couple who think it would be great to have a threesome. Forgetting about the morality aspect (since I am not prudish enough to think everyone has the same morals as myself ),
why would you offer another woman willingly to a man who once promised to love only you? Most women would get upset to catch their husband in bed with another woman, yet you really think you would be ok with sharing him? I guess I really am old fashioned.

Well, I'll dispense with the moralizing and concentrate on the practical aspects.

One thing you can do is advertise (there are magazines and newspapers where you can do this, plus online) that you are swingers and looking for a threesome. Be very, very specific as to what you want, and insist on AIDS testing. To be fair, whoever answers the ad will probably insist that you both be tested, so be prepared for that and get tested before anything starts. And, if you really, really want to do this with your friend, you can indicate to her or him (dollars to donuts, the friend is female, but hey, you never know) that you've placed an ad and which paper or magazine it's in, but with no further specifics. If your friend is interested, she or he will ask questions and you can work from there. If he or she is not interested, you haven't gotten too terribly specific although it will probably be obvious to the friend that there is something going on, and so the friend could become squeamish around you if she or he is not into such things. So be aware, the friendship could very well end over this.

In any event, you'll have options, as you will presumably receive responses to your ad and can pursue those if it doesn't work out with the friend or if he or she is not interested or is repelled.

Now, as for this changing your marriage, I will not say, although I'm sure you can see that things will be different, and not necessarily for the better.

I just seem unable to understand the difference between "advice" and "moralizing".

Would one of you kind spirits post a "moralizing" response that might show me?

I'd be truly grateful!

Moralizing injects emotional rules of behavior, ususally based on a religion that is not universally believed. To moralize would be to hold someone to standards based on beliefs they likely don't share--

so, in dispensing advice, most of us try to be logical, instead of emotional or pressing a morality.

A Moral Response--

The Bible teaches that adultery is wrong. It is a sin, and bad things happen when people roll around nude in oil with people other than their marriage partner. Please don't do it. You'll burn in hell.

---or

Its wrong.

It's also (IMO) more about who the person is than what they do. For example, moralizing would be "you're a bad person to even consider this." Advice would be, "get an AIDS test from a prospective threesome participant."

Meanwhile, jennylo, any updates?

Thank you, Sofia and Sozobe. I actually didn't know that "moralizing" was a religious thang. Makes it look kind of silly.

The reason I asked, is because quite a few of those who responded here, started out by saying "I don't want to moralize..."

So I concluded that ANY personal expression of right or wrong, was considered to be a negative, i.e. "moralizing".

Well...think about why it's wrong...
Who says it's wrong, and why is it wrong?

"Wrong" is value laden. Who's values? I guess they don't have to be religious in nature--but still a value system others may not share.

I disagree with some of that, Sofia.

We all make value-judgements during every single day.

Whether they admit to it or not, most people have values. If they didn't, they'd be raping, murdering, thieving terrorists.

"Whose values?" you ask.....I guess it's usually those of the family or general community in which we live.

My own personal values are those I developed throughout my life. Some are solid as a rock and not subject to change......some I might reconsider if given enough evidence. But they exist. And I'm not embarrassed to hold strong personal opinions about those values that are important to me.

I seldom if ever, advise others. Not unless they request that I do. When that's the case, as it is in this discussion, I would not consider advice-based-on-personal-values to be a "No, no..."

All advice (even the example of "get an Aids test") is based on the advisor's values, no?

I disagree with some of that, katya. <smiles>

I know we make value judgements every day. And, there are plenty of people, who DO go about raping, theiving and creating general mayhem, who believe they ARE operating within their value system.

When I say I won't moralize while giving advice here, it means I won't employ MY code of morals on THEIR situation--but will give logical advice, such as Get An AIDS Test.

For clarification, I didn't suggest that someone SHOULDN'T moralize here--but that most people here don't.

I may be wrong, but advising one to get an AIDS test doesn't seem moral to me, but logical.

We've lost too many good people to AIDS, haven't we. Your advice was logical...and sensible, Sofia.

<thank you, Eva>

Even though you say you're attracted to this other woman, would you really want to see your husband enjoying her???

Well, Sofia I think I understand where you're coming from (smiling back at you:).......and I don't want to use up any more space about this, but.....but.....someone who's asking for advice here, may not have a moral compass and might hope to find someone who does?

OK......I'm gone......