How to belive my husband after knowing his love life before marriage?

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We married 2 years before. My husband is very lovable to me. But he had a love with his college junior girl. It is continued in college days and after joining in office also he carried his love with that girl. He didn't tell anything like he loved her but he said he just had a crush in college days. After 6 months of our marriage life I came to know by seeing his messages, mails that they both loved each others and they msged intimately. I asked him about it he said that she is crush to me. But he loves me more. They both didn't continue their love now after our marriage. She also married. Its been 2 years still I can't forget that he lied to me and loved one girl and talked intimately. Till now am putting fight with him.
Anybody help me. How should I cope up with it.

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Type: Question • Score: 4 • Views: 1,114 • Replies: 10

@Aarthi balaji,

What your husband did before you married him is none of your business.
The important thing is, that he married you and hasn't had any outside interest after that. You cannot control what another person is doing while you have no knowledge of the person yet. That's absurd to think your husband owes you any explanation for things that happened prior to meeting you.

Who cares whom he went out with and/or loved before you. Get a grip on
what's important in life now, not what happened in the past.

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@Aarthi balaji,

You can love more than one person in your life. You can be best friends with more than one person. You love your Mum, you love your Dad.

Your Husband is very lovable to you, he has been consistent with you always stating he had a crush. He was a young man, he learnt how to express and now from that learning he is expressing more, with his wife.

He did not lie to you, you assume.. Even in a crush you talk intimately.

You need to let go of this now, or you will ruin your marriage.. I am sure you had crushes and talked in your sleep intimately to that crush.

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@Aarthi balaji,

Aarthi balaji wrote:

We married 2 years before. My husband is very lovable to me. But he had a love with his college junior girl. It is continued in college days and after joining in office also he carried his love with that girl. He didn't tell anything like he loved her but he said he just had a crush in college days. After 6 months of our marriage life I came to know by seeing his messages, mails that they both loved each others and they msged intimately. I asked him about it he said that she is crush to me. But he loves me more. They both didn't continue their love now after our marriage. She also married. Its been 2 years still I can't forget that he lied to me and loved one girl and talked intimately. Till now am putting fight with him.
Anybody help me. How should I cope up with it.

What he doing the intimate communication during your marriage?

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@Germlat,

I think she snooped and found the messages. She says nothing continued once they were married and that that girl is now married too.

Snooping gets you every time huh.

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@FOUND SOUL,

FOUND SOUL wrote:

I think she snooped and found the messages. She says nothing continued once they were married and that that girl is now married too.

Snooping gets you every time huh.

Well...I hope they weren't engaged when this went on. I wouldn't want to play second fiddle to anyone/ consolation price. What if she married someone else? I guess we need more details.

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@Germlat,

No, she said it was in his college days, prior to meeting her.

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Both talked intimately after she got married. She used to share her personal things like family and intimately with my husband before we got married. I asked him so many times he said he did mistakes in his early life and apologised to me also. After she got married why she have to talk intimately with him. How a days I started to hate him.

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@Aarthi balaji,

Aarthi balaji wrote:

Both talked intimately after she got married. She used to share her personal things like family and intimately with my husband before we got married. I asked him so many times he said he did mistakes in his early life and apologised to me also. After she got married why she have to talk intimately with him. How a days I started to hate him.

Sweetheart ...people make mistakes. As long as he was not disloyal to you, what does it matter? Are you thinking he married you simply because the other woman was already taken? Are you jealous of him having had feelings for someone in his past? I don't understand . But--if you can't get past this, you could ruin your marriage.

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@Aarthi balaji,

Don't mind that,forget it quickly!The more you think,the more you will be tired of that matter.

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@Aarthi balaji,

Hi There!
I believe that you shouldn't shatter your love.Just forgive him

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How to belive my husband after knowing his love life before marriage?

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