Dave was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone...anyone...and I know them."
Tired of his boasting, his boss calls his bluff. "OK Dave, how about Tom Cruise?"
"no probs boss, Tom and I are oooold friends, and I can prove it."
So Dave and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruises door, and Tom shouts "Dave, whats up? Great to see you! Come in for a quick beer!"
Although impressed, Dave's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Tom's house he tells Dave he thinks him knowing Tom Cruise was just lucky.
"No no...just name anyone else" Dave says.
"President Obama," his boss quickly retorts.
"yep", says Dave, "old buddies. lets fly over to Washington", and off they go.
At the white house, Obama spots Dave and motions him and his boss over.
"Dave! What a surprise! i was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and lets have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
Well, the boss is a bit shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the white house he expresses his doubts to Dave, who again implores him to name anyone else.
"The Pope", his boss replies.
"Sure. I've known the pope since I was an alter-boy." So off they fly to Rome.
Dave and his boss are assembled among the masses at the Vatican's St. Peter's Square when Dave says, "this will never work. I cant catch the popes eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards, so just let me pop upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with Him", and off he goes into the Vatican.
Sure enough, half an hour later Dave emerges on the balcony with the Pontiff, but by the time he returns he finds that his boss has had a heart attack , and is surrounded by paramedics.
Making his way to his boss's side, Dave asks him "what happened?"
His boss looks up and says, "It was the final straw! You and the Pope came out on the balcony, and the man next to me said 'Who's that with Dave?'"