Acquiunk
Women actually take the time to veil their contempt!? You must be doing something right.
Perhaps, but I can't figure out what it is.
Ceili, your experience is exactly what I was referring to in one of my posts. Our upbringing, our first experience with sex, especially if it is with a relative and unwelcome, our following relationships, all lead us to make decisions that might seem beyond belief to others.
Our experience and how we grow beyond those first, frightening years of adulthood, also affect our relationships. If one partner doesn't change, but the other one does change, the relationship seldom continues--at least not happily.
Sometimes we take happiness wherever it is offered if the offer is true. Sometimes happiness is so rare in our lives that if we don't take it and love every minute of it, we might as well stop living. I chose to live. I'll never regret it; in fact, I'll always be amazed at my unusual assertiveness.
Like others have said, I like you Ceili. You are a strong, good woman.
Stop, I'll blush.
Don't get me wrong. I would love to be in a committed, monogamous relationship. But, well.......
If I heard a friend of mine was sleeping with a married person*Vice-versa), I'd give 'em a slap upside the head, then I'd listen, because god knows, there are so many sides to a story.
I commend anyone who lives up to promises made and honours their word. I don't necessarily believe my actions have ever justified the many outcomes but I've lived my life by my own moral standard, which varies
My definitions aren't quite as clear anymore.
Me too. Way back in my past there was a rape too, just another date rape, but I was just past virgin, still tremendously naive.. I wasn't promiscuous right away, in fact I went to mass every single day, or almost, for about eighteen months until I got all involved in work and didn't have any sex for about two years, then luckily did have ordinary meaningful nice sex, thank goodness, for my sanity. Well, that is all more complicated, but let's say I didn't get what we would call promiscuous until seven years later, but a loss then did it. Must have been about a year, seems longer in my mind. Then I went back to neovirgin, and then I met a friend/lover and then my husband. He wasn't the perfect person for me or I him, or to correct that we were just right for a time but not as long as we stayed... we lasted 22 years, with two blips of unhappiness at each end.
What, anyone wants to judge me might be right, but put up yr dukes.
And that is not a challenge to eoe, who I like (sans judgmental tone).
eoe has gone beddy-bye. Night yall. Sweet dreams.
seven times I edited it, wow, but tuning, tuning, my view of my life. All much more complicated than twenty sentences or whatever we see on a post.
g'night back.
Interesting that I went on a blind-date on Saturday night (yes I ventured out in the freezing cold!) and discovered that my date was married.
We had met when I went for a drink with a friend and he was a coworker of hers (she never mentioned him being married) and he asked me out. I was really nonplussed about a date since I am taking a bit of a break from men right now. Anyway, we went to a nice restaurant for dinner on Saturday night and got talking about ourselves, you know, the history and what'not - where you been, what you did. I, jokingly, said to him "so, have you ever been married or maybe currently are?" and he said he was but things weren't working out and they were talking about separating. I sat with my fork frozen in the air and couldn't speak for a moment. I was pissed at first and then I asked him what he was doing going out on dates while he was still married. He shrugged and said he liked me and didn't I like him too? I said "not that much, so I guess I'll be leaving now". I did laugh when he asked if he'd be seeing me again. Funny guy!
I now know the first question to ask BEFORE a date.
At least he told you. He gets half a point for that. :wink:
Yeah, but take two points away from your co-worker for not telling you he was married!
But would he have told me if I had not hit on the right question - directly asking him if he was married? I wonder.
As to my friend, I called her said "thanks for not telling me he was married", to which she replied that it was none of her business. Says she once disapproved of a friend who dated a married man and was punished and lost the friend so now she keeps her mouth shut and lets people sort their own relationships out. Couldn't really lash her too much after that.
Heeven- I had met some guy in a club, when I was with some friends. I think that I went out with him three or four times, before he let it inadvertently slip that he was married. Yuk!
Same thing happened to me, except I decided not to go out with him because he was quite a bit older and I was a little suspicious.
About a week later, his wife called me and screamed at me for a couple of minutes, threatening to get me fired. I was so shocked that I didn't reply that he was the one who made the advance. I was 21 and very naive--I'd have plenty to say now.
BTW, he was really handsome, looking like the man in the old Hathaway Shirt ads, very sophisticated with a patch over his left eye. Hmmm....
Hey, Heeven...your co-worker gets two more points off. Telling you he was married would NOT have been the same as disapproving. She should have given you the facts. Eoe is right....some friend!
Well I can't blame her for his cheating ways - that, he does all by himself. I will be wary the next time.
