Good grief! Aren't these cheating spouses adults? Did the people with whom they had affairs somehow cast spells on them, forcing them to cheat?
I agree that, if the 'other' man or woman set out to ruin a marriage, it would be an ugly and unethical thing to do; but most affairs are truly outside marriage and allowing lawsuits like these are opening up a string of lawsuits that will ruin more lives than compensate those who were hurt in the first place.
I couldn't agree more Diane.
Hi Y'all,
Seems to me, that if 2 persons are in a relationship (not fling, not 1 nite stand) but a relationship which includes all the extra stuff, and they produce a child which they both take care of, if a split comes - the one with the child should get some support. I could possibly be biased, as I have 2 little girls from sitchs like the above described, but I have never gone after support, because for me, more hassle than it's worth. My husband is all the support my girls need.
Even though he was already married, I believe he did indeed enter into a commonlaw marriage with Margo. Is there a law that says you've got to live together a certain amount of time to be married? I hope not, because I know 2 married couples who live apart (one has a great job in NY, one a great job here in FL) and they 'live together' mainly in the summer months and they're most definitely married.
I think she's entitled to the same support she was getting while they were good together....just like a wife.
I don't think it's promiscuous though. 20 years, most likely 1 man (married though) not uh...
I think promiscuous is more like various #s dif guys/girls a month (on avg) for a number of years in a row...I think it's constantly getting with folks for the sole purpose of sexual gratification and changing the 'get together person' everytime. I formed this definition all by myself, because uhm, i used to know all about it.
I also think promiscuity is a word given to men & women who seemingly can't get enough, by men & women who seemingly think they're getting too much :::giggle:::
Whoa! I just read this whole thread from start to finish......
Be back to comment later .....but, as to promiscuity, I think that, in a very real, if flippant, sense - the usual FELT meaning is, as others have said, someone who is getting more than I am!
Montana- a reply to your earlier question-
If you were married and you could prove that the husband was with this woman before you separated- example- did he move right in with her after he left you. Any evidence of your (meaning your family's) money was spent on her or them- dinners, trips etc.
The union of marriage (in the eyes of the law) is a legal union. A married woman or man- whose spouse breaks that union - should be able to persue this legally(in my opinion). Of course, by suing the spouse for divorce and by suing the mistress or what ever you would call the guy.
In the case of a spouse sleeping with many partners- There is no legal recourse.
Also, depending on what state you live in - this type of lawsuit is titled differently.
If it were my husband- I would drain him and her.
Beebo
We were not married, but lived together for over 5 years, so does that make a difference to you?
You were probably considered common law in your state. - If you had joint financial stuff.
I have a very different view than some of you regarding:
1. Two people, not married, who have a relationship and/or children.
If there is no legal binding of the relationship there should be no legal discourse when the relationship ends. When children are involved, child support is automatic, right? That should never change whether the couple was married or not. However, if the partner (who has custody of the child) wants something from the other partner, I do not believe they should have a legal right to anything unless they shared finances while buying assets or something like that. If they buy a home together, they should split the home. If one partner goes out to work and the other raises the child/children, and they are not married and I really do not understand the common law wife/husband idea. If a choice is made to not work by one partner then I don't get why they should expect the other partner to keep them in the manner they have become accustomed after their split. If there is a marriage then it is legal. If there is no marriage then they are an "at-will" couple and any split should result in neither party having to pay out monies to the other because of it. Again child support is a separate issue.
2. If the other party of an affair should be held liable for the breakup of a marriage.
This is absolute rubbish. The husband/wife are the immediate guilty party of an affair. If a husband finds out his wife has an affair and she leaves him for this other man, SHE is the one the husband should be suing, not the other man. Yes, this other man is guilty of less than perfect behavior but he made no promises in front of a priest, judge, whatever, to be faithful. The wife did and if anyone is to be sued it is she. However, in most cases spouses are angry at the new partner their former spouse goes to - whether they be better-looking, famous, richer, whatever - and they want a piece of them, to ridicule them because they want to believe that, if not for them, they would still be happily (or not?) married. What they don't realize is their spouse was unhappy enough in the marriage to cheat in the first place, so the relationship was perhaps not working out before this!
Yikes, when does the madness stop? I wish people would take their own responsibility for the situations they find themselves in and stop feeling they are entitled to everything that others have. While there are really genuine situations where a spouse should be supported by an ex, most people could really get on with their lives and leave the bitterness behind.
beebo wrote:You were probably considered common law in your state. - If you had joint financial stuff.
I was the one supporting him, so I guess I lost all the way around.
No you didn't, Montana. You got a great son.
beebo wrote:You were probably considered common law in your state. - If you had joint financial stuff.
It takes more than just "joint financial stuff" and very few states even recognize common law marriage any more.
Heeven wrote: 2. If the other party of an affair should be held liable for the breakup of a marriage.
This is absolute rubbish. The husband/wife are the immediate guilty party of an affair. If a husband finds out his wife has an affair and she leaves him for this other man, SHE is the one the husband should be suing, not the other man. Yes, this other man is guilty of less than perfect behavior but he made no promises in front of a priest, judge, whatever, to be faithful.
The laws on "Alienation of affection", or what some people used to call "home-wrecking", is a carry over from British law going back hundreds of years (you know, when wimmins weren't allowed to think for themselves so it
must have been the other guys fault.
).
Most states in the US have dropped it from the books. I think there are only 8 or 9 states that still have it.
Honestly, the fact that people sue each other for alienation of affection makes me want to pitch. How on earth can you ask for cash because someones feelings have changed? What's next? Do I sue my mother because she sent me to my room when I was five? I felt very alienated of affection at that moment, I can tell you!
I could sue myself, perhaps? There have been times when I have alienated my affection for someone when I find out stuff about how they REALLY think....?
ya mean ya don't luv me anymore?
With that proboscis? How could I help lovin' ya?
... fine, making me look up words in the dictionary ...
ooh my beaker? Yus, well they all say that about me snout!
Heeven - I've read some articles lately on children suing parents for all kinds of (what i would consider) trivial things. It seems to be the North American way.
Eva wrote:No you didn't, Montana. You got a great son.
That is so very true Eva ;-)
