does she love me

@ossobuco,

i know but i love her for her not how she looks she could be the uglyest , poorest, ect girl on the planet i would still love her yes i am 29

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@Eva,

she was the one who approched not me i liked it anyway if it helps

1 Reply

@sffsa,

I don't really know what to say, sffsa.
We are of different cultures.

I see you as all fixated on this woman with just about no experience of your own, and I feel sorry for her, you with your eagle eye, no judgment, all crazed. (Not that I know all that - it is what I take from your posts).

But, if she approached you, I'll start to listen.
I'll stop posting, too many cultural differences.

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If she's the one who initiated the kiss, I say "Go for it!"

Yes, it's a risk. But you have no hope of getting what you want if you don't take the risk.

1 Reply

@Eva,

how big is the risk and can we still be friends if i take the risk and it goes badly cause im going to take the risk probably but i dont wanna lose her shes my best friend i love her

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Sorry, but that's the risk.

If you tell her and she's thrilled, everything works out great.
If you tell her and she's not thrilled, you may lose her friendship.
If you don't tell her, you get to keep her friendship, but you'll be endlessly frustrated.

Those are your only options. Please note that only ONE of them results in everything working out great.

The choice is yours.

2 Replies

@Eva,

ok 5 more questions

1.is there a way to approch this without posibly loseing the friend ship
2.how big is the cance that she'll be thrilled
3.should i just email this thread to her
4.any tips i never done this before this is the first girl i loved like this
5.can you plese give me all the experene you have

1 Reply

@Eva,

by the way thanks for the help i'll probably will end up marrying her someday because of you

1 Reply

@sffsa,

sffsa wrote:

ok 5 more questions

1.is there a way to approch this without posibly loseing the friend ship
No. It IS possible. A lot depends on the girl's personality. But bottom line, if she doesn't return your feelings, continuing to be friends will be awkward for her. I don't know her, so I can't say how she'd react.
2.how big is the cance that she'll be thrilled
Based on what you've told us, I'd say your chances are good.
3.should i just email this thread to her
NO! Women like men who are confident and decisive. This thread would NOT come across that way.
4.any tips i never done this before this is the first girl i loved like this
Take it slowly. Don't overwhelm her with talk of marriage and babies and forever after. Just enjoy being with each other, and see how it works out.
5.can you plese give me all the experene you have
Hahaha...no. It wouldn't do you any good anyway. No two people's experiences are the same. I wish you luck.

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@sffsa,

sffsa wrote:

by the way thanks for the help i'll probably will end up marrying her someday because of you

That is very flattering! I really hope things work out just the way you want them to.

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@Eva,

is there questions you can ask me that would make you able to tell how she would react

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@Eva,

by the way sorry for asking so much questions its just that im in love and looking for help handiling it hope you dont mind and also im very thankful for the tips that is probably exatly what i would of talked about

Quote:

4.any tips i never done this before this is the first girl i loved like this
Take it slowly. Don't overwhelm her with talk of marriage and babies and forever after. Just enjoy being with each other, and see how it works out.

2 Replies

@sffsa,

I'm sorry, but there aren't any magical answers here. Her response will be determined as much by her own feelings and experiences as by what you say.

Here's a plan:
Start out by saying that her friendship means the world to you, and you would never want to do or say anything to change that. THEN tell her that your feelings for her have become deeper, and ask her if she feels the same way. If she does, GREAT! If not, tell her you will not bring it up again, and say that you're really glad that the two of you are such good friends that you could tell her something that close to your heart. Then change the subject quickly to something light and silly.

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@sffsa,

sffsa wrote:

by the way sorry for asking so much questions its just that im in love and looking for help handiling it hope you dont mind and also im very thankful for the tips that is probably exatly what i would of talked about
Quote:
4.any tips i never done this before this is the first girl i loved like this
Take it slowly. Don't overwhelm her with talk of marriage and babies and forever after. Just enjoy being with each other, and see how it works out.

Ooh, yeah. WAY too much pressure! You'd be asking her to decide about love, marriage, family, children and everything all at once. That would scare off just about anybody! Let things develop.

1 Reply

@Eva,

thanks eva now i have a girlfriend she was actually having the same problem she could bearly stay still after i told how i felt i relly wish there were mor people to help with things like this like you just one more question
when do i pop the question

2 Replies

@sffsa,

Oh! You just made my day!! That is WONDERFUL NEWS, sffsa!!! You must be on top of the world!

The best relationships often start out as friendships. You have a solid foundation. I am so happy for you!

When to propose? I think that depends on where you are and what is expected. Cultures are all different when it comes to this. What do you think she (and her family?) would expect?

2 Replies

@Eva,

yea but i have no idea when i dont wanna take to long or be to fast

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@Eva,

i already got the wedding all planed out and the all the sulplys ready and still buying a heck of alot more it will be really fancy and the preast is just waiting for me to seual the wedding i just need to know what time help on when to pop the question but i have no experence with perposeing for marrige but can you plese help me determan when to pop the question and how i just dont know how long to wait but im ready and i have the wedding meterls and invites hidden well so she does not expect me to perpose only i have the key to that storeage room and the prest is keeping his mouth shut to i promased if someone offers him money to spill the beans i will triple it and im i approching this correctly or do i want her to figer this out i gathered from your post she cant figer out tell the time is right but the problem is i cant figer out that ehrn the time is right eather

3 Replies

@sffsa,

What country do you live in, sffsa? I'm in the middle of the USA, and I find this rather strange. It is common here to be boyfriend-girlfriend for at least a year or so before becoming engaged. And once engaged, it is the bride who plans the wedding, not the groom. I would be scared if a guy came on that fast and wanted to control everything. But perhaps that is not unusual where you live?

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@sffsa,

If you are 29, then just follow your nose. Your nose knows best.
Just kidding, but you shouldn't have to ask someone else what to do when you and your girlfriend seem to be attracted to each other. That is, you both feel the same. Are you from Mexico? India? Are you American Indian?

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