Hey, Can A Woman "Ask To Get Raped"?

@BillRM,

Quote:

Any firm who send out rapists is not going to be in business for long my friend for one thing.

That's why I asked the man how long he'd known these guys, how long they'd been working for him, and could he vouch for them.

It would have had an effect on my decision if he'd said to me, 'They're new hires - this is their first job.'

Maybe you should start taking some lessons in how to take care of and protect the women in your life.

URL: http://able2know.org/topic/158723-250

1 Reply

@aidan,

Quote:

don't give a **** if a man is attracted to me - if I'm not attracted to HIM - I don't want him touching me.

I have no problem with that but I do have a problem with your statement that if if a man you are not interest in try to do a mild romance gesture hoping to get a positive feedback from you it would sicken you.

He is neither assaulting you or insulting you, just communicating that he is interest in you in a romance way and hoping you share that interest.

You are a walking mine field in my opinion for any male who guess wrong that you might be interest in him.

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@aidan,

I had no problem with women knowing how to defense themselves if need be.

I do have a problem with women trying to teach their daughters irrational fears of half the human race.

The half of the race that unless they happen to be gay they need to find a lifetime partner from.

1 Reply

@firefly,

Dear heart a woman can indeed be rape anywhere however the chance of being rape in your own home with your husband and children is a few hundred thousands time less then the risk of a young woman our drinking and partying alone.

Behaviors can either greatly increase or greatly decrease the likelihood of a sexual assault happening to any given woman and the behavior on average of a young woman compare to an older woman place her at higher risks.

I find it amusing you do not care for the fact that woman do indeed have a large amount of control over how likely or how unlikely that they will be sexual assaults in their lifetimes.

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@aidan,

Quote:

Maybe you should start taking some lessons in how to take care of and protect the women in your life.

The woman in my life do not need my protection all that must even those I would be honor to give my life for her.

For one thing she have an conceal carried premise and is normally arm and aware of her surroundings.

She had travel many times around the country by way of either her own small plane or an RV and beside her 38 she also normally have a short barrel riot shotgun along.

I can remember teasing her more then once that if she ever needed to fire the shotgun inside the RV we would need to replace the RV.

To sum up I have no problem with a woman knowing how to protect herself.

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@BillRM,

Quote:

I do have a problem with women trying to teach their daughters irrational fears of half the human race.

How about men teaching their sons not to rape.

What are you doing--even in this thread--to try to change attitudes that promote rape?

You don't say a word to the men here who claim that the idea of being raped is exciting to a woman. And we aren't discussing erotic fantasies in this thread, we are discussing the real crime of rape.

If you want women to trust men, why mock the issue of rape? Do you think any woman really finds the idea of being actually raped amusing?

Do you think statistical probabilities matter to the three rape victims who have posted in this thread?

It's a real crime, with real victims, no matter how much you want to pretend it barely exists. And people who commit rapes are the reason it's a real crime. And concern about rape has nothing at all to do with how a woman feels about men in general. But men who act as though rape is insignificant or a "silly" concern, certainly give the impression they don't really care much about the welfare of women.

And if aidan says that unwanted touching bothers her, why can't you just respect her feelings? Why should she welcome an unasked for, unwanted, physical gesture of any kind? No wonder you're so dense on the issue of "consent".

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@firefly,

I have a problem with you taking a crime and pumping up the risk by a thousand percents or so.

I do have problem with you trying to redefine a crime so a large percent of the normal interactions between men and woman would fall under it to the benefit of neither men or women.

1 Reply

@firefly,

Quote:

And if aidan says that unwanted touching bothers her, why can't you just respect her feelings? Why should she welcome an unasked for, unwanted, physical gesture of any kind? No wonder you're so dense on the issue of "consent".

I have a large problem with her looking at a hopeful romance gesture by a male as sickening to her if the male had guess wrong concerning her possible return interest in him.

Now if a male would keep on after she communicated one way or another that she is not interest in him that is another matter.

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@BillRM,

Quote:

The woman in my life do not need my protection all that must even those I would be honor to give my life for her.

Well, the daughter I've been given to care for in MY life does need my protection, and it's my JOB to teach her how to protect and take care of herself.

You make normal caretaking and education sound like an illness. I have not and do not talk or act in such a way to make my daughter afraid of all men. Fortunately, she has had wonderful men in her life, in the form of her father, brother, grandfather whose presence has taught her that MOST men are kind and wonderful and would never hurt her.

What she hasn't had in her life is the experience or knowledge of a man who COULD possibly hurt her.
So I need to at least alert her and warn her that that IS a small possibility - so she will at least know it exists - because it does.
I'm not gonna leave her uninformed so she's like a lamb led to the slaughter.

It's like my father taught me - Most snakes aren't poisonous and won't even bite - but SOME DO! (he was a Texan, so that was his analogy of choice).

What if I'd grown up in Maine where there are no poisonous snakes and went down to visit Texas and nobody had ever told me about the existence of rattle snakes and the possibility of getting bitten and how to protect myself from that.

And lastly - I've only had two occasions with two men in which I ever felt I was being touched in a way I wasn't happy with. Thank god they weren't rapists.
I'm pretty good at giving the message I intend to give to forestall any of that unwanted stuff even happening.

But if I weren't - I'd have to rely on the guy's honor - wouldn't I?
I'd have to rely on him to have the integrity to take no for an answer and leave me alone.

And yes, it sickens me to think of what would happen and what does happen when a woman is with a man who can't/won't read her signs and leave her alone.

URL: http://able2know.org/topic/158723-251#post-4412214

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@firefly,

Quote:

How about men teaching their sons not to rape.

Men have no more special need to be taught not to rape then not to kill or steal or do a millions others anti-society behaviors.

Your implying that the majority of men are rapists in waiting that have a need of tight training not to do so is insulting to half the human race.

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@BillRM,

Rape is non consensual sexual intercourse.

That is not my definition. That is the definition in the state in which I live, and in just about every other state. I haven't re-defined anything.

Non consensual sex is not "normal". Normal sex is between two consenting partners.

I'm sorry if you don't like the statistics supplied by government agencies--like the U.S. Dept. of Justice. Complain to them about their "pumped up" numbers.

But statistics do not assess the risk for individual women. I cannot accurately predict the probability that I might be raped because too many factors enter into that--including whether I might encounter a rapist who has motive and opportunity. And all women must still try to take the same precautions to protect themselves, so statistical risk becomes somewhat meaningless as a form of "comfort" for women.

Why does it even bother you that women are concerned about rape?

The concern that aidan showed for her daughter's welfare was entirely appropriate. You just do not understand that safety is always a concern for females, where it's something men might not even think about. Perhaps that's because you never have to think about the possibility of being raped. Aidan was being a very good mother and she was teaching her daughter how to be careful.

It's not that woman shouldn't worry about being raped. It's more that it's a shame that women should have to worry about it at all. Being blindly trusting is a luxury few women cannot afford.

Quote:

Your implying that the majority of men are rapists in waiting that have a need of tight training not to do so is insulting to half the human race.

I never implied any such thing. But I do think young men have to be taught to respect women's feelings in sexual matters--just as they need to respect people's feelings in any regard. That isn't something people are born knowing.

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@firefly,

Quote:

Non consensual sex is not "normal". Normal sex is between two consenting partners.

No one had said otherwise but your statement/position that adults loss their rights to consent to sex if they had been voluntary drinking is bullshit and in such cases only the male never never the female is totally libel for any sexual activity that occur after such drinking.

That is not the law almost anywhere in the country nor should it be no matter how often you claim otherwise.

If is was the law then the female partner would be in as great a risk of charges as the male as I never seen a law that state only the female need to grant valid consent for having intercourse not the male. Women are suppose to be as responsible for their own actions as men are.

The law is for the most part is as South Central District Judge Sonna Anderson wrote in this ruling.

“However, it is not a crime in North Dakota for intoxicated persons to have consensual sexual encounters,” the judge wrote in the order. “Persons who are of legal age to consent to sexual relations and are not otherwise mentally infirm still have the ability to consent to sexual encounters, even though one or both may be intoxicated, even extremely intoxicated, may not recall the events clearly, and may come to regret their decision to have sex.

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@BillRM,

Bill, the shotgun is fine,
but your wife shoud not put too much faith in the STOPPING POWER
of a .38; that has not worked out very well in the past.

I respectfully suggest that she upgrade to a .44 special revolver, loaded with hollowpointed slugs,
and work out with it a lot.

David

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@firefly,

Quote:

I never implied any such thing. But I do think young men have to be taught to respect women's feelings in sexual matters--just as they need to respect people's feelings in any regard. That isn't something people are born knowing.

So a young man being raised by a mother and likely with sisters and surrounded with all others manner of females including a large percent of his teachers have a special need for a father to tell him not to sexually assault women otherwise being a sexual predator by reason of his sex he will do so?

What bullshit…………….

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@aidan,

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And you're telling me this because....?

have you forgotten the question you asked

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Who do you think rape is exciting to?

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Yeah, so I guess female, homosexual orgy attenders represent the average woman and her thoughts toward the penis...

I dont think you are right about that but they do present an opportunity to study arch-typical trends in femininity.

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And as far as being raped and living or getting in a car crash and dying - I can't say.

Thats going to be disappointing to your friends and family. I am sure they want you to stay around.

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So this 'rape as exciting entertainment' theory doesn't wash with me

The most common teenage female sexual fantasy ? While they are lying in bed masturbating a faceless stranger comes in through the bedroom window and finishes it for them and leaves before they have to introduce him to mummy. This is a rape based fantasy.

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@aidan,

Quote:

Or perhaps because they're seen as easier targets, more vulnerable, not having learned yet what steps to take to protect themselves and what situations not to put themselves into.

Wrong. Rape is not a crime of violence, it is a sex crime that is why so many women are not killed after being raped.

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I'm almost afraid to post this - now I'll probably get labeled a 'man/penis hater'

You expressed yourself very well. You wont get criticism in that area from me.

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But I'm not gonna act like rape doesn't happen - it does.

Your security is your responsibility and I can not criticise any choices you make in that area. Your cautioning your child is understandable to anyone who has kids.

Do you really believe there are no women who enjoy male power ? Who do not want to be roughed up a little ? Who whilst enjoying sex fantasise about being raped ? If you do believe there are some then all we have to agree on is how much of that is in the average woman. People are not totally different...they all have the same things, just to varying degrees.

1 Reply

@spidergal,

Quote:

You can make it two down, but I'd be highly skeptical of someone's viewpoint on sexual assault if they believe, to begin with, that rape could be exciting.

I use exciting in the physiological sense of adrenalin and stimulation of the mind.....but it can also be sexually exciting. Some rape victims go on to beat themselves around because the one thing that is never talked about and they are totally unprepared for is that there body, separate of their mind, actually enjoys it. The negativity of rape is amplified by preconditioning as to what rape is for a woman. This cultural preconception causes as many problems as the rape itself. Women can not only feel devastated by the rape, but also by their reasonable attitude to it afterwards and horror that their body enjoyed it.

1 Reply

@firefly,

Quote:

They really aren't meant to entrap anyone.

For most of our history in all cultures 14 was an acceptable age for a girl to marry. Womens lib comes along, and a boy of just 18 can be charged with rape of his girlfriend 17 when they were having consensual sex. In Australia it is 16 for a girl. In Japan it is 14. Are you sure there is no entrapment ? Think about the militant libbies and the bullshit they spread about men...they drove the politics for all these changes that now make a farce of a woman who is bashed and raped whilst going about her normal business. Not getting pissed with a bikie gang, not walking the streets alone at night, not giving the come-one to a man and then changing her mind after he has penetrated, not changing her mind the day after when her friends find out and go "oh yuck" but just going about her ordinary day. How the hell are they all the same ?

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@Ionus,

Ionus:

You're going to have to tell us where you're getting the stuff about women enjoying the act of rape and teens fantasizing about it from?

In my teenage, I did not ever fantasize about a stranger barging into my bedroom and forcing me into having sex with him. I will however admit to daydreaming about men I have been attracted to getting intimate to me. There's a difference, you see?

How many women you've associated with have admitted to having erotic fantasies about getting raped? How are you so sure in your assertion of it? Prove your deftness in female sexuality, please?

1 Reply

@aidan,

Quote:

how does she know not to do that unless someone teaches her not to?

Dont teach your children mistrust and paranoia...just point out the danger as minimal but to be careful anyway.

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Hey, Can A Woman "Ask To Get Raped"?

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