How many people is it acceptable to have.....

I heard the expression "village bike" a long time ago and it was used by women. I've never heard it in a song. It's not in We Are the Green Street girls.

Roger's Profanisaurus gives " bike n. A frequently ridden woman........often prefixed by office/factory/London Symphony Orchestra..." and such things.

More than 14 by age 20 when I was that age would have called forth a much stronger expression from the girls. The boys would have used something like "cert" or "a good thing".

Such a reputation tends to scare the timid males and with a signature like Queenie has most of the braver ones too. I tangled with one once myself and she was puissant.

I'm not judging you, Queenie, I merely suggested that you might be having thoughts along the lines of "village bicycle," what with the issues you brought up about guilt, emotionally unfulfilled, self-respect, and getting "to the point where its hard to draw the line..." You've made it abundantly clear that you aren't. I stand corrected.

Sure, the thought of "the village ride" popped into my head out of societal conditioning, just as the issues you've presented, and are mulling, have done the same for you. I gather that your societal conditioning isn't very different from mine.

About mutual respect in a consenting, casual sex relationship, only each individual involved could answer your question about the lack thereof in regard to themselves, but then the question was rhetorical, right?

The line, actually, is from the movie from which Slappy got his avatar. Maybe the line popped into my head because of my pop culture conditioning as well. I'll have to mull that one too.

You might do well to remember that Mr Aldous Huxley envisaged, in Brave New World, that participating in sexual activities two nights running with the same partner was a bit like eating your peas off a knife, three nights running was like playing the accordion in the bath and four nights you were up before the assessment board.

Queenie is a post-modernist I believe. Which is a replay of pre-primitivism. There's nowhere else to go as Picasso discovered. And others.

He also envisaged that everybody would look in their early thirties until they had a funny turn and then it was over quick.

Really? If you're not judging me then why take that sarcastic tone? I'm not here to have a battle of wits InfraBlue, but I want to iron this out.
When I imagine a village bicycle I imagine an unintelligent girl who thinks she's gaining popularity with the village residents by sleeping with them all, when really she's getting laughed at by a bunch of village idiots who don't like her at all but are happy to use her as an alternative to masturbation... Is that the stereotype of any woman whose slept with more than more than a few partners?
I may feel guilty, but I don't feel used, thats different.
I don't feel like a village bike, I feel like people are telling me I should feel like a village bike.
If it was a man posting this then would you ask him if he felt like casanova?

I suppose I feel like I've been playing a game of going out and seeing how good I can get for a year now, and the game has got boring. Maybe I should just do as shewolf says and up the difficulty, less people my own age, a string of lawyers or some crap.

Ive got a bike, you can ride it if you like----- Syd Barret "Bike" 1968

, roger mellie the man from the telly

love viz

the "village bike" imagery assumes the assumption of the male point of view, everything is about what they are doing, what they expect, what they are getting out of it. This all goes away if you are centered in yourself, what you are doing and what you are getting. Then it is not guys using you, it is you using the guys.

The problem for you is that if word gets around that you are a slut you will pay a social price from the females, guys will generally not take you seriously intellectually, and guys will attempt to use you. For this reason it is in your interest to keep the slut life a secret one. If you do manage that then there is a whole lot to be gained from that kind of life. The current boredom most certainly comes from the sex not being particularly good, or has been pointed out you are getting low quality guys. These are connected, because the best guys can take you places sexually that you have never imagined. It would take twenty years of good sex for you to have experienced enough for good sex to become ho-hum .

That's unfair Queenie. You can't go imagining your own definitions.

I did cite a source giving the London Symphony Orchestra bike, When I see a concert I often try to spot which one it is.

There is almost sure to be aircraft carrier bikes.

A Duchess once confessed on TV that her only regret was not having had the Edinburgh rugby team when she had had the chance.

And also, if this helps your bicycle shaped opinion of me Infrablue, I've felt guilty about sex since I've started having it, even inside a relationship.
In fact, when I had just got out of my last relationship and was thinking about starting to sleep with other people I posted on here about 'feeling vulgar' about the idea of having sex.

Yeah but they're not bikes, spendy. They're just women getting what they want, surely?

I'm going to leave this thread now and come back in a bit when I'm less angry.

My position here is taking Queenie seriously intellectually. You are speaking of guys who only think of themselves as intellectuals. Which is not the same as being an intellectual.

Are you suggesting hawk that she needs a more mature and experienced man?

Apparently you've skipped my link to an old post, Pentacle, or entirely dismissed it. Or someone who agreed with your exploration some time ago bores you.

I know you're philosophically/intellectually inclined.
I'm not sure I get InfraBlue, I might, but at least suspect he isn't the ogre he seemed at first glance.
My only real suggestion is to just be. Learn to walk by yourself and be contained by yourself. Screaming at banshees or parents or the disapproving people on the internet is a trip to nowhere. Achieve calm with yourself. Many people have difficult parents, and many parents have difficult children.
I'm not suggesting other people's resorts for doing this calming, some methodology.

One doesn't really hop between sex as exploration and some engagement (or not) and an intimate relationship. In contrast to many, I see no difficulty with that jump except that I insist time must pass for reacquaintance of you with yourself, aside from lovers or parents or peers.

Yes I know. I didn't use that term. I was discussing its usage. You do have to take account of what others think. Whether they are right or wrong.

hawk advised keeping it a secret. If you remember way back I advised the same. Tell every chap you fancy you are a virgin who has done a bit of horse-riding. Three years ago maybe. And not to get pregnant until such time as suits you.

no matter what the facts are, or even with no facts known, the assumption from both women and men will be that the men used you and you are a victim. They will try to convince you that this is so, will never stop trying in fact. Sexual truth telling is highly punishable in modern society if the truth as you see it is other that what has been judged acceptable. There are sex positive feminists who have rightly concluded that this assumption of Male's being abusers and women their victims is a yoke around women as much as the men, those such as the author of "the ethical slut" are trying to throw off the chains, but they have far to go.

this is the nature of the herd that you must live amongst.

I don't mean to battle you, Queenie. My first post was an attempt at empathy for the ideas that you posited in your first posts from a lucid, brutally self-aware, attached point of view. I was expressing irony, not sarcasm, albeit not particularly effectively, apparently, because I had forgotten the detachment with which postmodernists approach their thoughts and feelings, or rather, thoughts about thoughts and feelings. I was completely off base, as it were.

The character in the comedy to whom the term was applied which your post reminded me of was no peasant girl. She was a cosmopolitan jet-setter who, it was obvious, liked to have sex. I thought about such a woman actually thinking those thoughts, and feeling those feelings.

I also thought about an ex-girlfriend's sister who had gone in for a gang bang with, like, five guys. She was kind of wild, to say the least. She had expressed great joy about her experience, but then also great disgust with herself. No doubt a result of the conflict between her independent spirit and her societal conditioning.


So, unless people are actually telling you to, why is it that you feel like people are telling you to feel like a village bike? Or is it some internal conflict within yourself, or, pardon me, some postmodern thought about conflict within yourself? (Heh, sorry, just can't resist.)

To speak of men in general, sure, men have thoughts and feelings (the postmodern ones have thoughts about thoughts and feelings. [ok, i'll stop now] ) about guilt, emotional fulfillment, regret, not knowing where to draw the line, but men tend to be expendable, it's what societal norms dictate, "women and children first," and all that. You never answered Rockhead's question, by the way, did you hurt any of your conquests? Do you even know? (Reading back,it seems Rock took your posts as self-judgement also.) But men tend to approach things from a different perspective, about waist high, to be precise. I venture that most of the guys that banged you didn't bang you because of your intelligence/artiness/postmodernism. You'd be a conquest to brag about, and believe me they're bragging.

Maybe following shewolf's advice about a string of a higher level of lays crap isn't a very good idea either, especially if that's your take on it.




HOO WEE! And I am supposed to be the ogre here!?! What's more, Queenie likes you!

You're at your best in these threads, Spendy, not in the science threads.

That's a matter of opinion. But I do have a soft spot for Queenie and I try to give her advice based on long experience. She needn't take it of course.

From a non-Christian point of view she has done nothing to be in the least ashamed of. It is only the obvious practical dangers that are in play.

And her female observers will be jealous and indulge themselves with snidey remarks. And not only of her success. Her nerve too.

"Camp groundsheet" is another expression I have heard. ( A miltary usage.)

It's a fine sign that she keeps count don't you think? Compared to Sarah Bernhardt she has some catching up to do.

A bit back I asked "What's sex?"

was sarah bernhardt generous with her sexual favors before the age of 20?

People have different definitions for sex. During the Clinton years many people argued that oral sex is not sex. Others claimed that simple hand jobs were sex. While many maintained that sex is restricted to the penis entering the vagina. For me, it's all good!