On the edge and toppling off....

Izzie, I'm with you, kid.

I have an assignment from my art therapist--draw a picture of rage. She told me to tape the paper down because once you get into it, the paper can fly. I also release anger by pounding chicken thin, thin, thin. It's a physical release of anger, and it feels good.

You wanna try the drawing? It may help you. It may not. But it can't hoit.

Wish I could do more. Wish I could be there with you. Give those suckers one of my looks. I'm giving them one now.

Whatever happens, however you get through this (and you will get through this), I'm with you.

Please breathe--in both directions. (I understand that sometimes you forget to breathe out when you're tense.)

I don't know how to fight this system

I've read and highlighted everything... how he can't budget, how he can't communicate, how he won't engage with SocS, how he can't change a fuse, how he doesn't know basic first aid, how he can't do interviews or knows how to address people.... how he can't do this, how he can't do that, how he needs constant support and reassurance from the keyworkers but he's good at rap! On both Pathway Plans...

Question: Work needs to be done with the young person to increase their chances of employment? Answer: YES
Details:
R will need to be able to communicate his feelings in a more constructive manner.
Question: The young person has job seeking skills, for example applying for and being interviewed for a job?
Answer: No.


it says - the final box...

Contingency plan
What is the contingency plan if any of the planned arrangements fall through or cannot be financed?


Answer: R WILL HAVE TO FIND A FULL TIME JOB



They have his address as living with me with the telephone number of Links Tor... each time they answered NO to a question it leads with the next question... What/when/how will this happen, who was notified, were the parents/carers informed...... BLANKS.... nothing filled in..... BLANKS




How do you fight a system when they say he can't do all of these things... and then say he has to get a full time job.

He's a kid. I don't care what is chronological age is, chronological age should not be needs related.

I don't know how to do this, I cannot get a point across when they won't listen. How, how do I do this?

I am looking thru so much stuff and it's so overwhelming and frustrating - this system can't be argued with, it can't be trusted... it's been years of the same, over and over - to where he walks out of care before he's 18 and... job done!

I need to think. I can't think straight right now. I don't know how to do this...

The Manager and Keyworker will advocate for R tomorrow re MrP... I will have to restrain myself when I see him - it's making me feel sick just thinking about being in the same room as him. If that's how I feel, I can only imagine how R feels about him - being told "it's your fault R, you need to engage"

if it were that easy, would he be where he is now............ no

mental health is cruel cruel cruel cruel cruel cruel



Consultation: Report / plan discussed with child / young person
answer: Refused discussion

R would not talk to Social Worker.... therefore ............... NO PLAN! There has to be a plan.

All questions relating to disability : NO DISABILITY, NO LEARNING DISABILITY

Going to vacuum the house. Gonna suck up some dirt.


thanku

sorry

tears

angry

(((Izzie))) So glad you will have your lawyer with you. Hope his presence will help put the fear of God into that lot. Mr. P sounds like he needs a good kick to his tender bits to get his attention. Self-protecting little prick.

MrP is the past.

Do not engage in any discussion with SocS re the past.
You want their commitment to future planning.

In terms of the past, your comment could simply be to outline the time period he has been in their care. Current status of R is their doing - how are they going to be moving forward.

~~~~~~~~~~

R has been in your care from Day X to the present. The purpose of today's meeting is for you to confirm how you will assist R in being successful in his transition out of your care.

Please set your minds to this as the focus of our agenda. The agenda for this meeting is future planning.

MrP is welcome to remain in the room, however it must be clear that he is to have no future involvement with R or R's plan.

<now you're going to simply read the agenda items to them>

<then go over the agenda items 1 by 1)

Item 1. corrections to details of (whatever the document you got that is incorrect). I am providing you with a list of corrections (address/phone etc) today (hand it over to their lead). A copy has already been forwarded to you by mail/email (some trackable delivery).

Item 2. ...

at the end

We have covered Items 1 through X of our agenda. I will be providing you with a summary of the matters you have committed to completing/answering/delivering by email and certified mail. If I do not receive a written response to the summary within 14 days, it will be assumed that you have agreed with my summary. A copy of the summary will be delivered to my solicitor at the same time.

Thank you for attending.


<if all the items aren't covered, I'd suggest that part of the ending is you letting them know that you want detailed responses to the items in the same 14 day time frame>

Reading your latest posts & feeling for you, Iz.

It's a tough call but we know you'll give it your very best shot. (I'm glad you'll have your lawyer there, too. )

Some very good advice here from ehBeth. Nodding my head vigorously in agreement.

Just remember, Iz, you are cool, collected & thoroughly unflappable! :





Good luck to you, Iz. You've prepared your case very thoroughly. You've done the very best you can. That's all one good person can do.

Sending you my very best wishes & comforting thoughts as you vacuum your carpet within an inch of it's life!

Thinking of you, Iz.

Thank you - yep, Beth, wrote that up... and some

tired now, joints are complaining, desperately need sleep... spoke to carers and Pam (Ryan hates me... but I knw that)

hope i don't screw anything up for him tomorrow...

must sleep


thank you all.... bed
x

No, you absolutely will not stuff things up for him, Iz.
You are the only one knocking yourself out to help him.
And you will do your very best, you know that.
Please stop being so hard on yourself.

And now sleep, lots & lots of sleep!
That's what you need, my girl.
You'll feel much better after it. Trust me.

Night night, Iz.

100% what MsO says.

Think of your inner ice blonde.

You love your son. You have always done the very best you can for him.

You're not gonna screw up anything. You're gonna unscrew stuff. Trust yourself.

Hoping for something good to happen.

email this morning from SocS - clever

"We will be able to provide a summary of the meeting but I am not able to provide a professional minute taker."

That's it.. all it says.


I can't write - my hands don't work. Phoned the town SocS and asked them, they said no, have phoned my brother - he works for SocS in the place we are going to ba having the meeting... he's trying to find out if there is anyone there who can take minutes.

Will get my lawyer to ask on each point for everything to be recorded.

System stinks.

Sorry to arrive in this discussion so late, but I understand what you are going thru. That 16 - 17 year old stage is a real "limbo" in the SS area. When a "child" turns 18, it changes everything.

I am in the US, and here, at 18 the young man would have had a diagnosis given by a Dr. (Mental Health code - whether that is learning disabled, autistic, personality disorder, etc. and then would be certified to receive SS Disability. It ain't much, but then could qualify for low income housing and other benefits like food stamps and Medicaid.)

In any case, he MUST learn to work with the authorities, even if he doesn't like them. They really do have immense control over what will happen and if they think he is non-compliant or abusive, he is not going to get the help he needs.

Does he have problems with other male authorities? See if you can get another male SS worker to take this case thru.

pulling in a chair to sit with you today.


(((Izzie)))

leaving now... shaking...

thanku x

Good luck, possum.
You're going to be terrific! I know it!

I'm here too dear. Thoughts and prayers.

I'm here. Sending strong strong powerful thoughts toward you and R and S.

Beaming positive thoughts.

You are one of the strongest people I know, Izzie. I hope the situation improves.

Behind you 1000%, Iz-! Knock 'em dead. Where is the cheerleader emoticon?!...

Go, Izzie, go! Love you bunches, you super mom you! (and you are!)