From a proud Californian. c.i.
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These are wacky times in California........
"Yesterday, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he would run for governor of California. The announcement was good news for Florida residents
who now live in the second flakiest state in the country."
---Conan O'Brien
"Here's how bad California looks to the rest of the country. People in Florida are laughing at us."
---Jay Leno
"Apparently Arnold was inspired by President Bush, who proved you can be a successful politician in this country even if English is your second language."
---Conan O'Brien
"The big political news, Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor of California, and already, people are chanting, 'Four more vowels, four more vowels.'"
---Craig Kilborn
"They're saying Arnold will get 95% of the vote. At least according to his brother, Jeb Schwarzenegger."
---Craig Kilborn
"If Arnold is elected, you know who I'd feel sorry for? The people on death row. Imagine, you're about to be executed, the governor calls, you think it's your reprieve, and you hear 'Hasta la vista, baby.'"
---Jay Leno
"Yesterday Jerry Springer bowed out of the Ohio Senate race. He said, 'If I can't run the most embarrassing campaign in America, then I'm out
of here.'"
---Craig Kilborn
"It's official, Arnold said he will enter the race for governor. At least that's what everybody thinks he said."
---David Letterman
"President Bush has been silent on Schwarzenegger. Of course, he can't pronounce Schwarzenegger."
----David Letterman
"Critics have noted Schwarzenegger's only previous government experience was serving under President Bush senior as Chairman of the
Council of Physical Fitness, a largely symbolic office, where Schwarzenegger's only responsibility was doing hundreds of jumping jacks he was going to do anyway."
---Jon Stewart
"Schwarzenegger said last night on the show he expects his opponents to throw all kinds of dirt at him. And you know, it's started already.
Today, they released the one thing that could really hurt Arnold. Turns out he once starred in a movie with Tom Arnold."
---Jay Leno
"Finally, a candidate who can explain the Bush administration's positions on civil liberties in the original German."
---Bill Maher, on Arnold Schwarzenegger
"I went to see the Terminator movie the other night. Every time Arnold Schwarzenegger came on the screen this guy in front of me went 'Booo!
Booo!' and was throwing stuff. I had to say 'Governor Davis just shut up and sit down!'"
---Jay Leno
"Gray Davis got some good news this week: the Clintons are out here in California campaigning for him. Actually, Hillary is campaigning for Davis, Bill is out here for Larry Flynt."
---Jay Leno
"Hustler magazine publisher Larry Flint is also running for governor. I don't know, on election day, do you really want supporters of Larry Flint going into a curtained booth by themselves?"
---Jay Leno
"You know who should run for governor of California? Mike Tyson. He's built like Schwarzenegger, he spends like Davis, and he sounds like Barbara Boxer."
---Jay Leno
"Governor Gray Davis has asked the California state Supreme Court to delay the October recall vote because he says that's not enough time to put on a fair election. Hey, let me tell you something. If we didn't need a fair election to pick the president of the United States, we don't need a fair election to pick the governor of California."
---Jay Leno
cicerone imposter wrote:"They're saying Arnold will get 95% of the vote. At least according to his brother, Jeb Schwarzenegger."
---Craig Kilborn
Hard to believe that Musclehead is more obscene than Larry Flynt and a bigger joke than Gallagher.
Any word on where Arianna and Uebberoth are polling?
Craven, you're a Californian, aren't you? What's your take?
"Finally, a candidate who can explain the Bush administration's positions on civil liberties in the original German."
---Bill Maher, on Arnold Schwarzenegger
My favourite.
PDid, Those two are also rans. They don't have a chance in hell, and we're now living there.
c.i.
And those of us here in the Lone Star State gratefully pass the crown of High Ridiculousness to Miss California.
(applause)
Of course, Rick Perry could call another special session at any moment...
You know, our son is in the LSS. hmmm....... what might be the possibilities?
I don't know, if this was already posted (and feel awfully sorry for the double post in that case :wink: ):
the 1977 interview, when the then actor spoke of orgies, drugs, and homosexuality:
Schwarzenegger's Sex Talk
Yup, Walter, it's on the previous page, but no harm done to anyone except Musclehead (hopefully).
I'm just wondering why someone was looking at a Oui from '77.
Bill Maher's quip is a classic. "...in the original German."
PDiddie wrote:
I'm just wondering why someone was looking at a Oui from '77.
Perhaps someone stored it, remembering the days, when 'Oui' was the only "sexy" magazine to be bought openly? :wink:
Do we need to consider the source on this one? Kinda seems overboard to be looking back 25 years in a sex mag to soil a candidate's name - me thinks. c.i.
Kind of backs up my impression that far too many Americans are amazingly immature about sex, and they spend their lives thinking, giggling or complaining about other folks' sex lives, sexual pleasure.
Someone might have done a search on his name....
The John and Ken talk radio show in LA (KFI-AM640), which has been greatly instrumental in promoting the recall is now on a major rant about this:
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,95871,00.html
Well, one thing, thanks to Arnold's political aspirations, I now know things I never desired to know. (Yes, another poster discovered the oui quotes. Hey, I got there from TNR through the American Prospect. It's not like I went looking for it. <grins>). Still - you'd have to admit, if you were forced by gunpoint to say something nice about Arnold, that the quote at least shows him an honest, no-nonsense kinda guy. <giggles>
Quote:When Manso asked, "Is your cock disproportionate to the rest of you?" Schwarzenegger replied, "Well, that depends on what you mean by disproportionate. The cock isn't a muscle, so it doesn't grow in relation to the shoulders, say, or the pectorals. You can't make it bigger through exercise, that's for sure." He added that "women have told me they're curious about its size--you know, outgoing chicks who're just trying to be outrageous or horny. I hear all kind of lines, including 'Oh, you're hurting me; you're so big.' But it means nothing. Bodybuilders' cocks are the same size as everyone else's."
Now Arnold's candidature may reconfirm stereotypes about Californian fruitiness, but c.i.'s list of "comic" quips definitely confirms that American comedians must be the lamest and stalest in the world (barring the Germans, of course). You guys
really need to import some English zest and sharp-wittedness.
Only one that made me LOL was Bill Maher's ""Finally, a candidate who can explain the Bush administration's positions on civil liberties in the original German". Arnold's own "I believe gay marriage should be between a man and a woman" was pretty funny, too. I needed a laff.
Correct me if I'm wrong. Isn't the Maher line a pretty direct slap/reference to the holocaust? 'Civil liberties' in the original German...' And, if it is, does he insult Germany more than he does Arnold?
I'd be interested to hear how it strikes Walter, or other Germans.
No offense to those who found it funny, but this is one of those comments I think is just wrong. Could be my sense of humor is lacking....
Sofia, Sometimes we need to give jokes a little freedom; but where that line is is very difficult to determine, because everybody has their own ideas about where that is. I think, at this point, we've told more jokes about GWBush than any other individual or group that's probably more offensive than the jokes I included above. c.i.
As far as the meaning of the joke, it's referring to another time frame and I don't believe would bother someone like Walter in the least. This is HBO and Maher is going to be politically incorrect for sure. It's obviously the slam of the present administration that is funny.
Right, c.i., and I've done it on these pages. Remember the butt plug?
LW, Who ya vot'n for - if I may be so bold to ask? c.i.
