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Thu 24 May, 2007 09:06 am
A man in a dark uniform is sharpening a blade on a stone: "swoosh, swoosh, swoosh, swoosh..."
He launches to cut my throat...
That's when I wake up. It was a bloody bird outside my window, who has made it into my dream as a Khmer Rouge type figure. I wake up feeling nauseous with a severe stomach pain. Tired. But can't sleep anymore either. I've had diarrhea for the last ten days or more.
I usually deal well with stress. It motivates me, makes me productive. This time it's not so good. It might be the added responsibility - it used to be just a deadline for my own stuff that was on the line - but now it's three workshops and one week of fundraising events that I am handling. All coming up within the next 5 weeks. All of my colleagues are somewhere in the world - india, cambodia, california... so I'm here alone before I leave for Europe for the first two workshops and all is falling on my head.
But nevermind that. (Nevermind also the fact that it's corporate stress for nonprofit money). I love my work. I am taking it too personally, too seriously, too everything. I need some strategy of how to deal better with the overwhelming pressure.
I'm going for a run along the river. I also intend to organize my days better (I go to sleep way too late and then am constantly tired). I do know relaxation techniques (the only way how I can even fall asleep these days). But I don't know how to lessen the effects during the day, the overall impact of the pressure.
Any tested strategies up your sleeve? Any Jedi mind tricks? Advice? I'll take anything.
Exercise is #1, you know that.
Lots of fruits and vegetables.
Sunshine. Do you have windows in your office? When I was under heaviest workplace stress I didn't, and spending time in the sun helped.
Organization is huge. Prioritize, prioritize, prioritize.
Laugh. Spend time with good friends, rent funny movies, whatever it takes to get you laughing.
I don't live a stress-free existence now but I don't miss that aspect of my work -- it was often very, VERY stressful.
Re: organization, making lists always helped. Things were pretty much always less desperate than I thought they were, and making lists helped me realize that and also gave me a way to get through things in nice, digestible chunks.
i have lists, soz.
i never have enough time in the day to get through my list for the day though... there's simply more that needs to be done than i can physically do myself in 24 hours each day.
but i don't organize my time well. i get to work usually around noon or one, and stay until midnight or 1am... That suits me timewise, but...dunno. there might be healthier ways.
I do know the feeling. (More that needs to be done than you have time to do it.) That's where prioritizing comes in. Have three categories -- things that MUST be done no matter what, things that really should be done, and things that can wait.
Be realistic -- if experience has shown that you can't do everything on the list, make a list that you know you can do. Then add on stuff if you have time.
The aspect of never doing as much as you think you should be doing adds stress.
(I'm not saying you don't already know all of this, just sharing what worked for me when I was in a similar situation.)
Yoga!
I remember that after my very first class I felt like all the worries of
the world have disappeared and left me free and energized. It's such
a great feeling. There are different types of Yoga classes, and some
are especially helpful for stress candidates.
Dag--
I have a feeling that you have little experience in coping with feelings of being overwhelmed.
You have many responsibilities and long, long lists and the feeling that it is somehow your fault because you can't accomplish superhuman feats more than one or two days a week.
Sozobe and C.J. have excellent advice, but I'll add mine.
Can you make time this afternoon for a self-indulgent time? Don't multi-task in any way. Don't run. Don't make phone calls? Just spend fifteen minutes in the sunshine banishing The Man with the Scythe.
Hold your dominion.
Yikes, Dag, scary dream!
You need to take a break. Even a quick one. Like a walk in the woods.
I did go for a run along the river. That helped tremendously.
Noddy, I AM used to stress and being overwhelmed. That's the story of my life. I actually like deadlines and challenges. But this time it's tougher. I think it's because I have nobody around to help, I feel alone. And my boss being away is directly dependent on what I'll do while he's away. He can't do much from there. I don't feel guilty (just yet), just not in control. Being a control freak, that doesn't help.
Self indulging time with not doing anything for 15 mins? That sounds wise, but I don't think I can handle that right now. Talked to lk and her little nephew for a bit, but that's not doing nothing. I'm planning to watch a movie tonight and go to bed earlier. That should help.
This dream is just one of the many messed up dreams i've had lately.
Dag--
Eventually Atlas Shrugged--and Ayn Rand enslaved him while the world went to hell in a plastic basket.
You've been years and years and years living at a pitch near madness and now you're going a little mad.
Adrenalin junkies have limits, too.
How about boxing? You could ask your sparring partner to wear a mask of whatever monster is giving you so much work.
That would be the mask of Clio, the goddess of history. I think that might be helpful, yes.
Noddy24 wrote:Dag--
Eventually Atlas Shrugged--and Ayn Rand enslaved him while the world went to hell in a plastic basket.
You've been years and years and years living at a pitch near madness and now you're going a little mad.
Adrenalin junkies have limits, too.
Are you sure they had plastic baskets back then?
I guess you're right about the limits. I have troubles with those. Actually, I don't know what they look like.
I think Ayn Rand published in the Age of Plastic.
Atlas Shrugged came out in 1957, predated by vinyl, pvc, polyurethane, saran wrap and styrofoam.
Reading, Dag, because I have been through what you are going through right now.
Oh, I see, Noddy. I thought you were talking about the Atlas himself...you know. From thousands of years ago.
Letty, it ain't fun. But this, too, shall pass.
Doing better - just got off the phone with the Boss. So I did tell him we're not getting applications, and therefore that's no longer choking me. He knows I'm doing all that is humanly possible and I and he both know it's not my fault if we get no replies...
Tried to prioritize...it actually made me laugh. I took a marker and was going to highlight what HAD to be done. I highlighted everything in the end. Boss didn't help on that front either, for they really are all priorities. But he understands that it's too much and is genuinely sorry that it's all on my shoulders right now. It's easier to suck it up when he knows what i'm doing and where we stand with things.
Dag--
Laughing is a start.
The Original Atlas shrugged--and the bigger they are, the harder and longer the fall. Ms. Rand just picked up some of the Titan's overworked osteoporostic bones.
A sense of proportion is an excellent start.
u said you had a pain in your stomach? that sounds familiar i never thought that my stomach pain could be stress-related, even though i go thru more stress, WAY more than i should.
There's no one for her to delegate to.
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