I think my gf might be pregnant. Please help.

Perhaps we should stick to playing basketball and leave the hanky panky until we have developed more common sense.

Pre cum can contain sperm cells, so you do not even have to ejaculate in order to impregnate. Unprotected intercourse always carries a risk of pregnancy and STDs. The way you describe the act makes me wonder about your standards of personal hygiene (but I guess that is beside the point).

Andrew, one of the hardest parts about first loves is moving forward when it's over. I agree, somewhat, with your sentiment about not loving anyone else in the same way. First loves are fabulous, but they are also the most painful. You've seen joy and thought it would never end. Now you can't sleep because you can't imagine life without her. Someday, you will love again. You will love deeply again, but there will always be a special place in your heart for your first love.

One of the harsh realities of love is the realization that you only get to determine your own feelings. You can't control hers, you can't make her love you and want to be with you. She has a new boyfriend and you have to accept that. Waiting for the day that you are back together is not the best way to focus your energies.

I'm about to start talking this other girl that I really like. I think she is interested in me because we talked a long time before, and she seemed interested. But, I don't think she likes or would date me.

Then be friends with this other girl.

One thing I found when I was a teenager is that, when I was in a relationship, friendships could sometimes suffer because my attentions were focused only in one place. So be friends. This is a good thing. If things happen, they happen. If not, they don't -- but it's not a horrible thing because you don't have as much depth of feeling invested.

Didn't Andrew say he was 19 sometime earlier in the thread?

Well, advice still holds.

Andrew sounds to me very much interested in having a long time loving relationship as soon as he can get it. My own view is some people mature together with another person as mate forever, but many, perhaps most, do not.

When a person has been emotionally involved with another, and that has ended painfully, the counsel usually is to step back, regain your sense of self - really, this is a start of a growth period for you, Andrew, in getting to know yourself as a maturing young man. I mentioned "resting" before. Trying to be in love again soon is a little counterproductive. It might happen, and people often call that "rebound"... it is often from a need to love and be loved more than any 'right fit' between individuals. Trying to go back to this relationship that was not a complete one.. is also counterproductive. Part of maturing is to learn to be alone and strong, and then you can be together with another and love.

It is hitting me hard today, because it's been a week today since we've been broke up. I really miss her, and love her so much!!!!!! I am really depressed today. I am going to talk to this other girl, but ONLY as a friend for now. I'm not ready to start another relationship. If things happen, then they will but I highly doubt I'll ever love anyone like I did once before.

Andrew, this too will pass and I swear on a stack of Ben & Jerry's
Cherry Garcia ice cream that you will love again- and with as much or more intensity than this past relationship. It's normal to feel depressed when a relationship ends, it's like a little death, but the more we love the better we get at it and every new realtionship will be helped by what you learned from the last. Just remind youself that you are very young and have many years ahead of you for all kinds of experiences. I promise, you are just at the door where things start getting really interesting.

I just got off work, and I'm going and having some fun with a friend of mine. Were going to go to the mall and I'm going to see if that girl is working because I really like her, but I'm just going to talk to her now and only that But if things happen, then they will. But, I just hope I can get over this.

I'm starting to feel like this is just a phase were going through, and she will realise she really loved me. I had a co-worker tell me that he saw her come in, and she had a really thinking look on her face. I believe she is starting to realise that she really loved me. I honestly am starting to feel we will be getting back together.

Or, she could have been thinking about what she was going to have for lunch.

Sorry if that sounds harsh, but I well recall the teenaged (and slightly older) years of scrutinizing every nuanced shrug and inflection as if it were the Zapruder film or the Shroud of Turin.

You need to step away from this for a while. If you are meant to get back together -- and you might want to think long and hard about the ramifications of that, seeing as how she treated you -- you are going to have to give her space and not push it, plus it will help save your sanity if you occupy yourself with other thoughts and don't obsess about it.

As hard as it is going to be, I'm going to try and let her go, and and try to get over her. I don't know how I am going to do it, but it will be hard. The other night, I called her to see what she has been doing. Well, she told me her grandma was on the other line, and she would call me back. She never did so that was there proves she don't want anything to do with me. I'm going to try and just let her go. As much as I don't want to, I'm going to have to try. But, I'm always going to love her, and I will miss her.

Alright, I'm finally going to let her go. She is now dating my ex-best friend. Gosh this is so awful!!!!

Honestly, now I feel better, and I don't have feelings her for anymore now. There is another girl I like now, and she is ALOT better then what she was to me.

I have finally found someone who really loves me, and I'm happier now then I ever was!!!!

Andrew, you know I've been on your side, right? But honestly! Look back at the dates on your last four posts.

Do it.

Yes, right now.

You're telling us that in less than one week, you've fallen out of love with one girl, and into love with another? Huh?

Whatever you're feeling, dear Andrew, it isn't love. Love doesn't work that way. You're either rebounding (do you understand how that works?)or you don't understand the difference yet between attraction and love. Attraction can be instantaneous. Love has to build up.

I wish you the best of luck, as always, with this new relationship. But for heaven's sake, S-L-O-W---D-O-W-N!!!

Ah..... young love!

You've posted what I was going to say, Eva, but I already said it in part some time earlier, about a rest, a time for re-equilibration with yourself.

Seems to me that you are in love with being in love. Being in love has a lot to do with infatuation. Long term love keeps some aspects of that, but is deeper. What is your rush? You seem to be very uncomfortable to be by yourself. You are quite dramatic about your experience, but I read it as at infatuation level. Staying with one person for many years has to have more basis than immediate needs. Love is a result of caring from both of you over time.

But you have to know about who you are... as well as care for them.

Yep, I'm picking up on that too, osso.

I have the distinct feeling andrew is just jerking us around now, and has been for quite some time.

No, I havent fallen in love with another girl yet. I'm still not ready, but when we get together it's just really awesome.