PARENTS BRINGING UP A SPOILED GENERATION!

Good for your wife. Lunch menus are shameful here, too, it's something I've been following with interest. (Alice Waters has a really cool program going):

http://www.edibleschoolyard.org

That is very cool, Lord E. Kudos to your wife. When my son first started school, he bought lunch there. After a week, he begged me to pack his lunch and has been bringing his lunch ever since. I got a good look, once, at what they called a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I don't blame the poor kid for not wanting to eat it.

One of the things about setting limits/boundaries is that it's easier done sooner than later. As in, around toddlerhood. Same thing, I think, with good food choices. Kids don't do the grocery shopping so they don't actually get to make food choices until they've had plenty of opportunities to see how their parents make food choices. That's my opinion, anyway. All of the junkfood my kids like -- chocolate pudding, ice cream, pringles -- are a result of things I've introduced to them myself. Had I never brought chocolate pudding in the house, they'd have no desire to eat it. Now they are old enough to see things on tv that they think they want. Sometimes I let them try something so they can see that they don't like it or that it makes them feel gross. Knowing what I know of soz, I'm positive that it is no accident that she has a kid who is very good at finding her own limits.

Lord E, who pissed in your wheaties this mornin'...? You want to nit-pic...then lets do so...lol

Ok...

You disagreed with my post, we agree on that part.


Now....



Yes, I said that.

So...lets tear it down shall we...again.

I never said..."Here Dear, here's a 4 pound block of chocolate, stuff yourself till you puke. And...you don't have to worry about eating supper, because I have filled you the rim with crap to eat....we understand dear, you can eat later...I have icecream for later."

I understood what you said Lord E, I didn't disagree with you, I was simply saying that....

You can feed a child 3 squares a day, at some point, they will not want to eat. You can't force feed them....and don't need too.

My children are fed three..sometimes four times a day.

I encourage them to eat breakfast....whether they are hungry or not. Yes, I'm push at them to eat. But I know that breakfast is an important part of the day, I know its the fuel that keeps them going while in class....

But if they insist that they don't feel like eating, or just not hungry, the option is left open till we leave for school....I keep encouraging them to eat...breakfast.

Lunch is at the mercy of the school.

They come home in the afternoon and they snack. Our snacks around here consist of whole grained cereals, whole milk. We keep granola, baked chips, fruit.....and yes, junk food. But there is a limit on it. They aren't going to sit and eat any damned thing they want....because....why? We are going to eat supper.

We eat as a family.....they are taught their manners...and they are expected to use them at the table. They are encouraged to eat till they are full, there is no cleaning off the plate before you leave. But there is a nudge...to eat.






You betcha! But no where did I mention junk food in my initial posts, or disagree with you on that. What kid wouldn't? Hungry or not?






Yep...agree on that. BUt I didn't say, "Allow a child to do as they damned well pleased."

Like you, there are rules in this house......boundaries...limits....etc...





I never said, "Let a child choose their own sleeping times. And I understood the first time what age range we are speaking of.

My children have bedtimes...and by god, they are going to bed at that time.

I was speaking of naps. Which I stated in the other post....




Disagree all you want Lord E...your wrong. Teaching a child to eat when they are not hungry, teaches them to eat whether they are or not. Apparently you have never had a wieght problem....so don't tell me how it works.



YEP....!

How many children have you witnessed that would sleep till...say ohhhh 9a.m. in the morning. And by noon, you have a mother standing there telling them its nap time, because she feels the need for them to take a nap? Do you honestly believe that the child is tired after three hours of wake? They may have just slept 12 hours...but oh yeah...lets make them take a nap again....

Thats not what I stated Lord E....

Anyone with... any common sense knows a child need their rest.

I never said.."Let the child pick whether they wanted a nap or not?" That would be ludicrous.....




Baitin' me ehhh? I soppose you would say..."No boundaries, no diet restrictions."

I would agree with you on that statement....but there is also this....

Because in today's society we have parents spitting out children and taking no responsiblity on their part. They are absent, and too busy multi-tasking in different areas of their lives, whether it is jobs..or spouses, or boy/girlfriends. They are too wrapped up in their own world to realize they have a responsiblity to someone other than themselves. Its a me world to some.

These children are given no direction in life, except to be pointed to the computer or t.v...or given a cell phone to keep them busy.

Instead of parents picking their lazy asses off the couch when they get home...they should be getting out in the yard, or getting their children involved in sports as a family. But we have those that think otherwise. They need to be setting an example...

Our Juvenile Justice system is wrapped up in children of all ages that have had no home life to some extent. They are neglected...abused, witness to abuse, or emotionally shut out...Basically, no parental involvement.

There is no home structure present to support these children. They are taught no social skills, no respect, no values...and no morals... and to be just like the idiots that gave birth to them, selfish!

Lord Ellpus and I would have had perfect children together.

We would raise them logically and cherish them, until the mother ship came back to pick them up.

If we were still young enough, we would have been issued more pods.

MMS, I love it when the protective Lioness is aroused. It's the sign of a good Mum.

One thing I didn't take into account, was that you did not have the benefit of having seen the speech before you made that post.
I came in from a different angle. My wife has to put up with one hell of a lot of uneccesary crap from unbelievably unruly teenagers, backed by their equally unruly parents.
I saw this thread, and the initial posts where people were putting down the idea of actually placing boundaries and restrictions on children.

Looking back, I reacted to your "pre-link" post in haste, and should have waited until you came back and commented. For that, MMS, I apologize unreservedly.

Had you made that post AFTER my extra info on the subject, however, I would still be acting as if someone had urinated on my wheaties, whatever they are.

I thought it was "Who pissed in your Cheerios?" Oh well. Different strokes for different folks.

Lord E, Thank you very much.

I kept thinking...you weren't getting what I was saying...and it was flustering me.

I do believe in boundaries...many of them. I believe in children having responsiblities bestowed upon them, along with punishment for not following the rules, and restitution if necessary. They need to be taught that there is a penalty to their actions.




I soppose I missed that....




Bless her heart! I know she does, I have witnessed it in our local school. I have even threatened to pull my children from our school and have them sent to another one. It would put me into a major bind, but if its beneficial to my children, then ohh well.

If schools were run the way they were when I was in school, strict! We wouldn't have those brats running the school, and their children tending classes.




ROTF....Wheaties are the cereal of champions. Whole grain...sugarless! LOL

That's definitely a big part of this whole discussion. Badboy didn't give a link, or even indicate that there was a link to some specific thing. He titled this "PARENTS BRINGING UP A SPOILED GENERATION!" (which sounds rather more general than 5% of the British population) and then went on to complain about parents buying their kids computers and letting their children eat when they want.

That's broad and silly.

What you linked to seems quite reasonable -- but doesn't have a whole lot to do with Badboy's summary (? if that's what it was) and of course, this being Badboy's thread and all, it was his summary/ initial post that was being reacted to.

POSTSCRIPT .

Earlier today, I had spent an hour on the phone to my wife, talking her down from an exhausting day at an appeals tribunal, where she was grilled mercilessly by a lawyer working on behalf of the parents of a 15 year old boy who had been permanently expelled from her school.

My wife works as a Head Teacher of a school over 120 miles away, and stays in a little place we rent up there during the week. My car is in for servicing at this present time, otherwise I would have driven up there to be with her, she was that upset.

The boy had initiated a fight, for no reason, with another lad in the playground. There was full CCTV fottage of him making a lunge at the victim as he passed, hitting him several times, and then proceeding to stamp on his head while he lay on the ground.
The perp had a long record of bad behaviour, stretching back several years, and had been the subject of temporary exclusions from school in the past.

My wife made the decision to expell him (permanently exclude) and all hell broke loose from the parents of said thug. They launched an appeal, and hired a lawyer who is famous for his bulldog tactics.

As a result, she has had to spend approx. twenty hours of her time, preparing the case, several sleepless nights worrying about it, and a whole day out of school today, having to endure the usual dirty tricks that cross questioning layers get up to.

She won the case, and the parents now have to take Master Thug elsewhere to finish his education.

There has already been an anonymous threat that my wife's car will be "dealt with".

She has another appeal hearing regarding another case next week, and yet another the week after that. It is an inner city school in a very deprived area. This, apparently, is the norm.

At this moment in time, we are both very tempted to pack the whole work thing in, and f*ck off down to our farmhouse in France, in order to grow tomatoes for the next twenty or so years.

Oof.

That sounds just awful.

(Er, everything before France and tomatoes, that is, France and tomatoes sounds rather nice...)

IMO it is impossible to spoil a child.

It is entirely possible to raise a poorly-behaved child.

I guessed that, Soz. (smiley inserted here).

It IS very tempting. We have been mulling over the idea for about six months now. We could afford to do it (just), but hmmmm.

Maybe I'll start a poll thread, and get a vote on it, as we can't make our minds up. We'll let the power of A2K decide. What do you think?

I vote this way:

Avez-vous une salle pour les Atookaians qui veulent vous rendre visite?






(I'll even get out my proper French grammar books if you say "oui")

Oui, ebeth....naturellement.


C'est une ferme dans la Borgogne. Beaucoup du vin, est les voissins sont les vaches Charollais.

As you can see, I need to brush up on my french.

And given your answer to ehBeth, I need to, too! :-D

Merci bien!



[will they understand my Joual accent?]

It can't be any worse than my sister in law, who originates from the Jura (mountain region, near Switzerland).

It's very "sing song", and any other French person listening would be able to pinpoint her place of birth pretty much straight away.

We were in a McDonalds once (in Geneva...everywhere else was closed) and were served by a Canadian guy who spoke French to my s-i-l. She couldn't understand him, so he turned to me and asked for the order in English.

Her brain was still working in French, and so she was totally confused when she realised that I understood what he was saying. I didn't help matters by answering his question in French (I always try to speak French only, when I'm there, for the practise more than anything).

I have never seen her look so baffled. It's a funny old world, really.

Do it, LordE! Move to France!

Then invite me to visit every year.

I know how to grow tomatoes.

You'll need me.