Me too.
Five years? Maybe five years?
I'd totally like to kick the ass of those "parents". That stuff makes me crazy.
And possibly that adoption agency.. or was that a private adoption..
I think it was a state adoption.
They adopted through the foster care system.
That makes me want to start carrying air sick bags in my purse.
<sigh>
I've ranted so long and so hard about adoption law that sometimes I lose my voice and now I fear losing my ability to type.
I will never understand - nor do I want to - how anyone
can abuse a child.
Have they done studies on the foster care system vs.
orphanages?
"I will never understand - nor do I want to - how anyone
can abuse a child."
It's easy.
Unresolved trauma and abuse.
Sigh.
"Have they done studies on the foster care system vs.
orphanages?"
yes.
Foster care would win hands down. Especially if it were properly funded and supported.
Not that it makes any difference, but I do wonder what reason these foster parents gave for doing this?
The reason they gave, if I remember correctly, was that the girl had an eating disorder as a result from her traumatic past.
I'd have to find all the old articles to be sure but I recall that there was some evidence of eating problems at the time of the adoption.
Certainly not the kind of problems that would cause something like this.
I don't believe they had a "reason" that they had withdrawn her from school and never sought medical help.
A neighbor saw the girl and called the cops or.... the neighbor realized that she hadn't seen the girl for quite some time. One way or another it was a neighbor who called the cops and blasted the thing wide open.
dlowan, I am curious to learn how child protective agencies
work in Australia.
Let's say a child is taken from the parents due to abuse,
what are the steps after that?
In California, the child is brought to a state run child center
for a few days until appropriate foster parents are found,
and then placed in foster care until the case is legally
resolved which means the child goes either back to their
parents or will be freed up for adoption. This is done rather
quickly otherwise the child stays too long in foster care
and will be too old to find suitable adoptive parents.
I will write more fully later, but basically you guys seem to move a lot faster, with less evidence of abuse, and to make permanent arrangements waaaaay faster than we do.
We are at the end of a cycle of valuing natural parent's rights (or the paramount importance of the relationship with the natural parents) over almost anything else...at least in my state.
Our welfare people are also pitifully understaffed, under skilled and react, really, only to the most blatant abuse. The foster system is in tatters, kids get finally removed, if at all, after a tortuous process that can last years.
It is shocking.
We are drafting new legislation, but I see no evidence that the system will receive proper funding.
Thank you dlowan! The deeper one digs the worse it gets,
and in the end the children are the ones who suffer the most.
Unfortunately, child protection and social services are
everywhere understaffed - I think basically because the salaries they get paid are not worth the aggravation and
emotional grief they encounter doing this job.
Nah...they just don't fund enough staff...I mean, it is underpaid for what it is, but they would have more people to do it if they funded more jobs without necessarily giving raises.
The parents were sentenced to three years in prison, two years of probation and must pay back $13,000 in state funds that they were given to help care for Kayla.
During sentencing the parents said that they had gotten in over their heads with Kayla -- that she had been abused before and that she had behavior problems. They blame the state for not doing enough to protect Kayla while she lived in their home.
It was an anonymous tip that led to the discovery.
Thanks for that article. I have heard that there has been a rise in abuse in foster homes. It's sad really. As disgusting as that sounds about the state not doing enough, it is true. Social workers are supposed to do visits every month and they are so inundated with cases that they don't do it like they should. Now in this case she was adoptd so they woudln't be so involved. I think they go wrong when they don't do enough of a study into the family. Like I knew of one family that adopted a child who could not move on his own enough to feed himself little less to protect himslef and they put him in this family that I swear to you that you could not be in the same room with this family more than 5 min. and not know that they were crazey. They don't do enough to make sure that a disabled child gets a safe and good home. They only have one thing on their mind and that is to move these kids when they can as it is hard to get them adopted and this is only my opinion as I adopted my daughter through the same place. I think more should be done to protect these kids. It was way easy to adopt her and they trusted me far to fast. I wasn't even licensed before they had put her in my home.
Now I'm not biting the hand that fed me but if they gave her to me that easy many could be given the same way to bad people. Like Kala was. I also think that adoptive new parents should be given some kind of counseling, especialy those that adopt kids with oppositional disorders. I don't know about other places but here it is not offered to the parents only to the child. I think support should be offered to both.
Anyhow on a nicer note grin they calle dme yesteray about the chance to adopt a infant. The mother has to choose us but I have my fingers and anything else that can cross crossed lol I so want this so keep me in your prayers please.
Women hate jellyfish. Tell him it's a sea cucumber.
Wow DB! I didn't know that you were trying to adopt! Good luck. I'm keeping all my everythings crossed for you too. Keep us informed!
I do think they are often desperate to place children and sometimes mistakes are made. When you consider the mistakes that landed the kids in foster care in the first place, though....
It is hard to know.
I worked at a big trade show this weekend and the booth next to mine was a group of doctors and therapist who worked with kids who had ADD/OD/dyslexia and other learning disorders. They use a non-drug approach, neuro-cognition or some such thing.
Being me, I picked their brains all weekend!
I think I surprised them with all my neuro-research that I have done over the years.
Interestingly, most of their clients are kids adopted from foster care or were kids being raised by their grandparents or others like me who just found themselves raising someone else's kid and wondering what the heck is happening!
It was quite interesting.
cjhsa. Did you read this thread before you posted?
I'd really think you were a sweet little numbskull if I didn't know about the whole gun thing....
Just kidding.
I don't think you're a numbskull by a long shot.
(But I intend to stay out of firing range, anyway.)
I haven't seen you around for a while. Where have you been? I hope everything is okay.
I only read the first page, not realizing how long it was. Obviously I'm a little out of sorts.
No one has mentioned that children sometimes abuse their parents. And I'm not just talking about adult children and elder care.
Your sort is welcome on my thread even when you're out of sorts.
In other threads I have certainly mentioned how children can abuse their parents -- and I wasn't talking about elder care either.
It is an interesting topic that is not well addressed.
Kayla is my biological cousin. Our family has been looking for her. When we came across this we were crushed. Granted our family isn't perfect but her mom loves her. DHS took her and her sister out of their moms custody because they were in "danger" and look what happened. She would have been "safer" with our family. this makes me sick, and whats even sicker is they only got 5 years. Kayla is going to have to deal with this for the rest of her life. Kayla if you read this we are looking for you
