Let me just post this so that everyone knows what you are trying to say Synonymph. If I am wrong, please tell me so I can correct my post.
Quote: I am a passive agressive and trust me...being so drives me nuts. I see myself acting like an a-hole and there my hubby is, trying to negotiate, trying to "talk me down". He is both a leader and a cherisher but he does tend to lean more toward the leader aspect most of the time. But usually once the scene is over, I will apologize and "come to my senses". I have been actively working on not being a complete crazy and actually have found out that a lot of this behavior is being caused by a medical reason. I don't know if this is something for you former man to look into but lots of times, emotional crap stems from physical crap. Something to think about.
I think what she was trying to point out is the bolded statements (the other parts being supporting evidence). I think her intent was to trap me with my own words. While I appreciate her attempt, I would like to point this out. When I say passive aggressive I meant I am sometimes a little emotionally irrational with my husband. I do not have a Passive Agressive personality disorder. I do not "act out" here, despite what you may think. I have never shirked away when proved wrong. I can admit being wrong. Perhaps you will say that my bluntness is Passive Agressive. Great. I think it's called honesty. When people say they are passive agressive, it usually means that they
sometimes display behaviors that are similar to that of actual PA behaviors. Meaning, they act like children. I can admit that sometimes, I act like a child in arguments with my husband. I am far more emotional with him than I am here. That does not mean that I am always that way.
These are passive agressive traits associated with the disorder. Let's just see if I actually fit the bill....
(1) procrastinates, (I am a planner. I don't procrastinate)
(2) sulks or argues when asked to do something he doesn't want to do, (Nope. In fact, my policy is to get it over with as soon as possible)
(3) works inefficiently on unwanted tasks, (Again, nope. Just got a raise at work for my effeciency)
(4) complains without justification of unreasonable demands, )I can think of more than one person who fits this bill)
(5) "forgets" obligations, (I am usually the one reminding other)
(6) believes he is doing a much better job than others think, (Again, nope. And I have the review to prove it)
(7) resents useful suggestions, (never. I always agree that the better solution is the better solution, no matter who it comes from)
(8) fails to do his share, (I pull my weight and hate those who don't)
(9) unreasonably criticizes authority figures (Again, can we name some people who fit this better than I?)
So, I guess I was mistaken when I said I was a passive agressive. Hm. Well, I guess that just makes me a bitch, huh?