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Nervous and Excited... Take the risk??

 
 
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:01 am
Ok, well I have had this "crush" on a guy that works right down the street from where I work... I see him almost everyday I work and he flirts alot... Laughing ... And now that I have been single for almost a month I want to get back into the world of meeting new people....

The only thing is, I don't know if he flirts with just me or everyone! I have seen him when other girls come in and he didn't seem to acknowledge them like he does me... I come in and get a smile and a "Hi Christine.. blah blah blah".... but he always flirts...

So anywho, I have had this "crush" on him for a few months now... and I want to give him my phone number.... Do I take the risk?? I know there is always the chance of rejection and all.... and i know he works near me... but I could always change where I eat, lol...

Should I?? I am all antsy, I feel like a little kid waiting for Christmas! Laughing Laughing
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Green Witch
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:23 am
I think it's hard to make that first phone call. It's the 21st century - Why not just ask him out? Just say "hey you want to meet for coffee after work on Thursday?" or "I was going to see suchandsuch movie this weekend, want to come along?" - Be friendly and casual. If he likes you he will find a way to say "yes" - either by accepting your offer or making one of his own.
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:24 am
Hmmm... what if I said I was going to the pool hall with a few people 2nite and gave my number and told him he should come or something along that line... Should I do a group thing or a just me and him thing?
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Green Witch
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:31 am
I think just the two of you on a simple date. Other people will put more preassure on him. I really think you have to be the one in control of the offer which would require a simple "yes" or "no thanks" from him.
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:32 am
My biggest fear is rejection... but if I never do it then I never will know.... Everyone gets rejected from time to time... I am just gonna put my head on the chopping block, shut my eyes and Pray
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Green Witch
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:37 am
Go for it. The more rejection you get the more resilient you become. Rejection is not fatal and the other possibilities are great.

I once asked a guy in High School to go to a dance with me. He flat out in no uncertain terms told me to go away. I was really hurt, but I went ahead and asked another guy who said yes. We ended up dating our senior year and are still friends to this day.
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Crazielady420
 
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Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:42 am
Thanks GW... That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger!!!

I'd like some MALE OPINIONS also please... I am trying to look at it from a guys perspective, would it be to intimidating if the woman made the first move?
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material girl
 
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Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:47 am
I like the idea of casually asking him to a group thing.It implies no pressure on either sides, give him your number so he can call if he cant make it, asks exactly where it is etc but he could use it to call you for a date before the communal gathering!!
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 07:54 am
Well my original plan was to give him my number and say we should go out sometime this weekend, each bring a friend or two and shoot some pool... then his friends and my friends would be there and we would feel comfortable... and then I could so or we could go get a bite to eat... leave him with the choice of being with me alone or with a group

But I don't know if he has a girlfriend either! I am also guessing his age, he seems right around my age, maybe a year or so older
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material girl
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 08:01 am
Always best to have a group, if your friends like him then half the work is done.

Age doesnt matter.Just go for it, in one way or the other.

Just realised how inexperienced and unhelpful Ive been.
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 08:07 am
material girl wrote:
Always best to have a group, if your friends like him then half the work is done.

Age doesnt matter.Just go for it, in one way or the other.

Just realised how inexperienced and unhelpful Ive been.


You have been very helpful thank you!! Laughing
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 08:30 am
Can I get an opinion from any of the men on the forum?? I need a guys point of view!! Puh-Puh-Puh PLEASE
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squinney
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 08:38 am
Re: Nervous and Excited... Take the risk??
Crazielady420 wrote:
I feel like a little kid waiting for Christmas! Laughing Laughing


Nice package, huh? Laughing

Let me ask you this... Do you hesitate to let your friends and family know what you want for Christmas?

This is kinda the same thing. Let him know what you want.

(Then hope he he asks you to sit on his lap.) Very Happy

Boy, I'm on a roll!

I'd hunt down Bear and ask him what he thinks, but we all know he'd say "Go for it!"
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 08:40 am
No I am usually not shy at all, if I like a guy I will straight out tell him... but because we work right next to each other, that is why I am all choked up about it.. but I am not afraid to speak my mind, but I also know when not to speak it too much!!

Nice Package indeed :-)
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 09:25 am
Ok, well I go to lunch in an hour and a half and I am hoping he is working... I am soooo nervous, but I can do this!!

I will let you know how it goes when I get back.....

I can do this, breathe, I can do this.... I better not chicken out!
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littlek
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 09:26 am
Do let us know........
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Crazielady420
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 09:51 am
will do.. right now I am trying to concentrate on work, but I am so nervous and I am so worried that I won't go throught with it, even though I know that it is what I want to do!!!
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ehBeth
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 10:23 am
Go for it - I'm with GreenWitch on not mixing other people into the first coffee/whatever. Too much pressure.
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Crazielady420
 
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Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 10:30 am
I am thinking about it too much now, I shouldn't be this nervous, I feel like I am a little shy girl again. and I am not... ok I am just gonna keep writing to take my mind off of it... lalalala..lalala... Ok, I can do it... I can deal with rejection... what is the place is jam packed with people and I don't even get to talk to him, oh no!! Ok, think positive.. he flirts alot with you, it can't hurt anything, maybe he likes you too and he is just to shy, or maybe he is just a flirt in general...ok ok ok ok... hmmm.. oh well
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Chai
 
  1  
Reply Fri 9 Sep, 2005 10:52 am
Do you have a business card?

If so, you could casually give him one and just say something non-threatening like....

I thought perhaps you'd like my card, in case you'd like to go to a movie sometime.

Then, don't continue that conversation....as a matter of fact, do it as you are leaving.....that way, he's all impressed that a woman thought that much about him, but if he's not interested, he's saved face, it just won't come up again.

Why not make up some cards of your own?
Blank ones are are office depot....you create your own message....

something classy like

Hot Babe Looking for Good Times.

really though, you can do it in a classy way.....it works, I've done it.
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