Making the First Move? / Neverending Advice & Hints....

extra medium wrote:

Setanta wrote:
If i am not mistaken, i believe that it has been observed in this thread more than once that there is a certain irony in those who stake out the watering hole and complain of the taste of antelope . . .

the hell of it is:

often a meal tastes really good, once or twice or even for a week.

but one only realizes years later that is better to build a diet on vegetables, fruit, grain instead of ice cream and candy

ice cream and candy tastes great for a day or so...

pizza tastes great for 3-4 days

ironic that vegetables taste the worst for one time, but best over months and years...especially if you add a lot of spice

I think our friend has just had a moment of Satori here.

Beautiful.

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X, to catch you up: that was my original question actually:

You know the scene-- that girl in the bookstore smiled at you. You like her looks and vibe. But you're not sure if she just smiled a polite "hi" smile or a "come hither" smile.

We've all been there. I've approached one like that, and her boyfriend walks up a few seconds later and I feel like a jerk. I approach another exactly like that, and we end up in a 5 year relationship.

How do you tell the difference? You're one of the experts. :wink:

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Use the force EM, trust your feelings.

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extra medium wrote:

So getting back to my original question and to try to crystallize it:

I guess there really is no consensus as to how to know for sure if the girl is just smiling "hi" or smiling "come hither" --- just gotta go with it and take a chance if you feel it...is that it?

Yes!

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Great, throw me right back to the cryptics.

Ok, I'll go watch Star Wars, bring a big gun, and I'll be set!

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Nothing ventured, nothing gained . . .

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Eva wrote:

extra medium wrote:
So getting back to my original question and to try to crystallize it:

I guess there really is no consensus as to how to know for sure if the girl is just smiling "hi" or smiling "come hither" --- just gotta go with it and take a chance if you feel it...is that it?

Yes!

Thank Eva. Hey I notice your avatar is smiling at one of us???

But no really, thanks! :wink:

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What've you got to lose?

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I can think of at least 5 different occasions in my life where the woman was basically giving me the "keys to the kingdom" and I was too stupid, or too shy (even worse) to pick up on it.

I thank my lucky stars for my wife every night, but sometimes regret being such a dumbass.

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Nothing really to lose.

Except if its a person you see again and again...really its no biggie then to.

Okay, next girl that smiles at me better watch out and be ready!!! I'm hyped. Razz

"hey baby"

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There is no shame in being turned down by a member of the opposite sex.

(Repeat until it sinks in.)

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LionTamerX wrote:

I can think of at least 5 different occasions in my life where the woman was basically giving me the "keys to the kingdom" and I was too stupid, or too shy (even worse) to pick up on it.

I thank my lucky stars for my wife every night, but sometimes regret being such a dumbass.

I'm right there with you, X.

Well, on the plus note, if you would've got with those other girls, you may not have met your wife...and oh you might be medium happy, you might not be as happy as you are now.

Thats another thing about the whole deal, a whole other Oprah Show: its almost a bit like Las Vegas in that way (flames expected on this comment--please don't disappoint!)

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extra medium wrote:

Nothing really to lose.

Except if its a person you see again and again...really its no biggie then to.

Okay, next girl that smiles at me better watch out and be ready!!! I'm hyped.

"hey baby"

A slightly self depricating charm and sense of humor will take you farther in life than "Hey Baby".

IMHO

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Love? Oh, definitely a crap shoot!

Ya pays yer money, ya takes yer chances...

I've been married (this time) for almost 22 years. If you had told me the night I met my husband that he was the one I'd end up with, I would have died laughing. You never can tell.

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And on that note,

I think we might have driven the truly wise crowd away from this thread.

I blame myself.

Humblest apologies.

(pipped by Eva.)

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thanks for all the advice everyone

actually it was a great cross-section of excellent advice from men & women.

good stuff.

i will read and re-read. really

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Hoping you find happier hunting grounds.

Keep us posted.

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Oh I'm in a weird space on that...

Actually, (and I hope this doesn't sound too bad)--

I meet quite a few females in my day to day life. And some I think are intrested.

I think the deal is I've grown pretty picky...perhaps too picky.

Funny, my friend was talking about this happening to him a few years ago, and I couldn't comprehend what he was talking about.

Now its happened to me.

One thing about being with a really great woman--it spoils you for 98% of the others out there....

Now I realize thats just an attitude adjustment I need to make...

But I do know I've gotten way more picky than I used to be...its good and bad.

Its like you'll go on that Elephant Safari, and before you would get 12 Elephants, now you're like "none of those 12 are worth hunting"...ha ha ha so I need to look at that.

I need to overthink that one... :wink:

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LionTamerX wrote:

There is no shame in being turned down by a member of the opposite sex.

(Repeat until it sinks in.)

Yup. I'm the turned down masta'. But like in sales, you've got to hit your "no" quota before hitting a "yes."

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Hunting metaphors aside.

Best advice I can give you...

Find someone you can stand.

I know it sounds cold.

But...

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Making the First Move? / Neverending Advice & Hints....

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