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Thu 7 Apr, 2005 06:53 pm
I am going to quit masturbating. Sure, laugh all you want, but I can and I WILL.
In fact, I propose we have a contest, much like the one from that infamous Seinfeld episode. We'll all put in a hundred virtual A2K bucks, and the last man or woman standing takes the prize. Of course we will have to use the honor system, much like the Seinfeld episode. But we all know each other...that shouldn't be a problem, right?
So come on, who thinks they can go longer than me without a good diddle? I'll kick your ass!
If you would like to join the contest, just jump on in this thread and let me know. I think we should start the contest tomorrow night sometime. Midnight sounds good. Anyway, if you want in, let me know.
By the way, if you're a woman, you have to give us two weeks as a handicap.
So who is in?
So kicky, how long do you have to wear the cast ?
Are you saying the only way I can do this is if I'm incapacitated? I swear, I am whole and healthy, baby!
One of these days, we all chip in and buy you a hooker
kicky
Why would you want to go without masturbating?
It's all about self-control and discipline. They say that true strength, at it's core, is all about restraint.
So, you want to take the challenge? Huh? You think you have what it takes?
If I attach the end of an industrial-strength vacuum to the end of my weiner and turn the power on, does that count as masturbation?
If it doesn't.... then count me in the contest.
You are in! Tomorrow night at midnight we begin! I knew Gus would have the guts to join me in my test of will.
Okay, now who else wants a piece of this action!?
I think I could out-not-masturbate you easily enough, but again, why?
I understand the power of the chi and kundalini (whatever) and recooping the power of the otherwise spent seed/energy..... I also understand about reserving your seed for maximum potency when wanting to impregnate a woman.... So, are you wanting to become some smelly, hairy, mountain-top dwelling guru? Or, are you trying to get a chick knocked up?
I think I get it.... you guys are thinking that if you make this bet, all the women here on A2K will be trying to seduce you - a position you'd be happy to find yourselves in.
Wow, you're very analytical, aren't you?
I have to admit, you lost me right after the word "I". You see how my brain doesn't quite focus correctly? This is one of the things I hope to correct with this display of self-discipline. Now come on, just say you're in, pony up the dough like Gus did, and we will all be ready to begin tomorrow night!!!!
< Gustav sits cross-legged on the floor and begins deep breathing exercises >
Ooh, Gus is really in the right frame of mind...I was thinking of tossing off about sixteen times before tomorrow's deadline to get ready, but maybe that deep-breathing thing will work better...
not so much gutless as not interested.
Okay then why don't you be my little helper? Once the contest starts, I need you to stop over Gus' place and do a little dance of the seven veils for him...that oughta give me just the edge I need...
Stumble It!
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